rivercitystein Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 After much discussion my boyfriend & I have decided to have a threesome with another female. I have never been with another female before so this is new to me. The idea of a woman pleasuring me is exciting but I'm not exactly comfortable going below the waist on her. Has anyone else had these inhibitions? How did you handle it. Any suggestions or advise would be appreciated! Please only respond if you have experience with MFF. I understand many do not agree with threesomes but that really isn't what this post is about. Thanks. Link to comment
Sparkly Eyes Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 Did he talk you into it? I feel like you don't know what you want to get yourself through. I might be wrong, but if you dont have real desires for it, dont do it for him, it will just ruin your relationship. I dont know how to go down on a girl and god it is the only thing I dont ever wanna know!! Link to comment
doyathink Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 I wouldn't like it. Yuk. If my guy wants a 3some...then he can have it...after I leave him. I'm not at all about sleeping with another woman. I don't find women attractive. Are you doing this just for him? Link to comment
rivercitystein Posted March 12, 2009 Author Share Posted March 12, 2009 No, he did not talk me into this. This is something we both want to experience together. I believe there is a difference between making love and having sex just as a form of adult play. We've been together for over 11 yrs so this is not something we are just jumping into. This post is just another way for us to get additional info. Link to comment
uofagirl Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 Eww. Forget it. I agree with DYT, he can after his 3some after I leave! Link to comment
knightingale Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 I suggest drinking before you do it. A lot. Kind of kidding, but honestly it will relax you and lower your inhibitions. This isn't really my thing, nor will it ever be, but that's the only advice I have with something like this. Link to comment
FloatingAnchor Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 If you're not comfortable going down on the other woman, then you should bring this up and ask her what her expectations are. I think it's important to establish beforehand the actions that are allowed and not allowed by each person. Link to comment
knightingale Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 If you're not comfortable going down on the other woman, then you should bring this up and ask her what her expectations are. I think it's important to establish beforehand the actions that are allowed and not allowed by each person. This too. Make sure all of you know the guidelines. You don't HAVE to go down on her. You don't HAVE to do anything! Just do what you're comfortable with, otherwise it won't be a good experience. Are you doing this with a mutual friend? Finding someone via a networking site? Who the person is has a lot to do with the comfort level. Link to comment
anbreeuh Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 Never, ever, ever do anything you're uncomfortable with in the bedroom, even if it is to please a partner. It can stir up a lot of mixed (and usually negative) emotions that can lead to resentment, feelings of awkwardness, etc, that can put a strain on other aspects of your life and relationship. If you're not 100% into the idea, speak up before you're subjected to a situation you're not comfortable with. The worst he could do is get angry with you, and in that case, it may be time to reevaluate your relationship. Do what's right for you! Link to comment
rivercitystein Posted March 12, 2009 Author Share Posted March 12, 2009 Are you doing this with a mutual friend? Finding someone via a networking site? Who the person is has a lot to do with the comfort level. We are going to use a networking site. We haven't actually arranged anything yet. We will discuss the rules with her so we're all on the same page. Link to comment
knightingale Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 We are going to use a networking site. We haven't actually arranged anything yet. We will discuss the rules with her so we're all on the same page. Hmmm, okay. It's good that you'll discuss the rules beforehand, that's very important. I would also probably go with someone who has done it before, even if just one other time. I say this because it will be easier if you can follow someone's lead, you know? I'm just saying how I would do it, though. But seriously, have a couple of drinks. Good luck! I hope it goes well for you. Link to comment
TheSmilingTurnip Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 Hmmm...I think there is a poster on this site, rosephase, who might have some information for you. I believe she's done threesomes and might by polyamorous (different from what you're going through) but she might have some tips for you. Might want to PM her and see if she does. I may have the screen name wrong. Link to comment
doyathink Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 Hmmm...I think there is a poster on this site, rosephase, who might have some information for you. I believe she's done threesomes and might by polyamorous (different from what you're going through) but she might have some tips for you. Might want to PM her and see if she does. I may have the screen name wrong. Yeah, I thought about her too...but didn't remember what went after Rose. lol Link to comment
Moz Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 I did get offered a MFF 3 sum, but turned it down. I mean, I've never been able to satisfy one woman, what chance would I have with 2? Link to comment
girl68 Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 Why don't you just not do that? I assume theres plenty of other things you can do with the extra lady in bed. makeout, fondle her boobs, finger her, watch while your bf has sex with her and touch yourself. Who says anything about you having to go down on her? If you don't want to or can't bring youself to- who cares there's so many other things you can do! Link to comment
bubbleblue Posted March 29, 2009 Share Posted March 29, 2009 Having tried this, but a man, man, woman, I can only say how akward it was. They were both friends of mine and they pressured me for months, so we tried it. I have to say it was not a great experience, I guess really because I could not get over the fact that it was his wife? I would suggest getting a room in a hotel, one that has a really BIG bath, big enough for three. Go to a comedy show, have a few drinks, come back to the hotel, have a few more drinks, run a bath, LOTS AND LOTS of bubbles, and a bottle of wine. Start by taking a bath and see where it goes. And agree before hand that it does not have to be an all or nothing thing, relax, enjoy it and have fun! Link to comment
BrunetteBarbie Posted March 29, 2009 Share Posted March 29, 2009 I dont understand why some posters here are so grumpy about it,saying eww dont do it or I would never do that....Thats not rly helpful and thats not what the thread is about! >=( rivercitystein - That is cool you have decided that.... I had a 3some, it was fun. Its not everyones taste, but for me it was extremely hot.. (It was MFF too ) You dont have to go down on her if you dont like,but whos to say you shouldnt try it?? Before I had sex with a girl, I also thought ewwwh... After I did it for the 1st time, I cant get enough of it But if you really really dont wanna try... you can also do other stuff on her. Or she can go down on you. Its alll up to you. ANd thats cool you are talking about the "rules".... thats makes some things easier and it will prevent awkward situations. Hope it goes well for u (Im sure it will!!) and have lots of fun Link to comment
rivercitystein Posted March 29, 2009 Author Share Posted March 29, 2009 Thank you, a helpful post! Link to comment
TheSmilingTurnip Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 awww come on. mine was helpful! Link to comment
blue69 Posted March 30, 2009 Share Posted March 30, 2009 The wife and I have tried this type of 3sum before. (as well as MFM). She was "curious" about being with another woman. Definitely communicate with your partner but also make sure you fully communicate with the woman. Try to figure out what you appreciate in a woman. Does the idea of kissing, light touching, caressing, turn you on? Is is the pleasure your partner will receive by "watching". Will he be involved, touching, sex, oral? What are the basic boundaries you are establishing? Once you have established your boundaries it will be much better. But then just go with the flow. Enjoy. My wife initially didn't want me to have intercourse with the woman. I was cool with that. We kissed, touched, licked, it was very nice. Eventually she realized she was much more comfortable than she expected and encouraged us to have sex. Just realize as with any sexual activity, you can only progress as fast as the most hesitant individual. Enjoy and good luck. (Also be realistic, that it is sometimes difficult to find a single woman to join you. It is a very common fantasy of many couples) Link to comment
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