The back and forth

[EQD]

So i am reading henry rollins' book "Smile youre traveling"

and i actually really like it. At one point or another and even at my current point i completely understand and share almost all of his thoughts on life. As a matter of fact i cant remember one time i didnt.

 

Having plans and making them happen.

 

He wrote about this, and while he was talking about it in reference to seeing a certain country on the map and going there, or thinking of a song and making it... i can relate to his feelings of accomplishment, and the high he can get on life.

 

Right now as i see it i'm not going to be a rock star, i'm not that into music, it doesnt move me. Very few things do.

And i'm a minimalist. I dont need alot of anything, and i dont really want it. I'm happiest when i have 'just enough' and i dont strive for 'a little more'

 

There are things i want, and i always end up getting them. I thank my planning and determination for that.

Meanwhile there are things that i have given up too.

 

The biggest difference is i am a minimalist who is ok with mediocrity. Henry Rollins smashes mediocrity with a meat cleaver. He damns it.

 

My life seems to follow the same hazy pattern, up dog, down dog. I want to go out and be wild, go to extremes. I plan it out.. and i... fade out.

 

I havent found my niche, all hobbies are taken up and slowly dissolve into happy, content.. mediocrity.

 

I desire nothing right now. I am intense about nothing. And i feel blank and at peace with myself and with the world around me.

The fire never burns for too long.

 

How bad is it not to burn with a solid identifiable passion?

[SapphireNoir10]

Im like this.

 

I have so many great plans, to travel the world, learn to drive, but Im just not doing what I think I will.

 

I can write...but I cant write a book or anything productive. I cant sing, I cant do anything really special.

 

Its a horrible feeeling. I guess were in the 'finding what it is we want to do, be' stage.

[Jeremiah Johnson]

 

My life seems to follow the same hazy pattern, up dog, down dog. I want to go out and be wild, go to extremes. I plan it out.. and i... fade out.

 

I havent found my niche, all hobbies are taken up and slowly dissolve into happy, content.. mediocrity.

 

I desire nothing right now. I am intense about nothing. And i feel blank and at peace with myself and with the world around me.

The fire never burns for too long.

 

How bad is it not to burn with a solid identifiable passion?

 

One thing I've found is if people purposely go out and *try* to be amazing and reach great heights, then they'll usually fail. Because that obsession causes them to dismiss many opportunities that would have actually led to great things. I believe a person just has to do what they love, and if they don't know what that is, they have to never give up looking. Sometimes the most amazing people take the longest time to find their path.

 

Also, regarding your niche, that's probably a good sign. Not being able to find your niche means you're destined for great things because you'll have to carve out your own.

[EQD]

I wouldnt really say its horrible.

i think its better to be this way.. i can imagine if i did have a talent.. a really good one.. and have no desire to enjoy it.

if i could sing really well.. yet have no desire to be a singer... that to me would be worse.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

Perhaps what you have is a passion for constant variety.

 

You get bored once you have experienced something and 'figured it out'... And you need high stimulation or you lose interest.

 

There are certain personality types who need lots of stimulation, so they need careers that are really exciting and suck them in and keep them engaged. They are bored by routine, and need challenges. Many like that become EMTs, ER nurses, firefighters or jobs that are periods of calm where nothing is happening, followed by intense periods of high and very stimulating/engaging activity.

 

They also need to change and progress in their careers rather than a routine job doing the same thing over and over again. Mental stimulation is key.

 

Have you ever taken any of those online career tests/inventories? They ask you a lot of questions, some seemingly odd, that test not only what you think you are interested in, but your personality type, then they suggest professions. For example, the might ask a question like, 'if you are at a party, are you the center of attention in a large group of people, someone who finds one person and talks to them a long time, or someone who stands in a corner and watches?'

[EQD]

yeah. i will probably check that out.

but when i am not doing anything or otherwise stagnant i feel content. it may be a mind trick but i truly think that.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

It requires a lot of energy to throw yourself into a new passion.

 

Creative/high stimulation people tend to run in cycles, where they have intense periods of creativity followed by periods of sloth (lol, i mean inactivity).

 

They need down time in order to recharge their batteries before they have the next go at something demanding.

[EQD]

hm. never thought of it that way.

Do these types of people ever settle? or do they just 'cycle' all their lives?

[BeStrongBeHappy]

Most people who need lots of stimulation re-invent themselves all the time.

 

They might find a career that is really interesting, or do one career for 10 years, then switch. Or have an 'easy' career and lots of outside interests that constantly change.

 

There's nothing wrong with being this way unless it makes you unhappy or prevents you from doing things you want to do.

[LBP]

Obvious suggestion: why not travel?

[EQD]

i have a horse. i cant go anywhere for long.