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"Smell" is big for her... need clarification!


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Greetings ENA,

 

I'm posting to try and get some third party input on what she means when she says "Smell is a big thing for me as to whether or not I will be attracted to them!".

 

Now, before you assume the obvious and say get washing, brush your teeth, wear deoderant, and put some cologne on - I've asked and thats not what she means. She calls it a 'natural smell' irrespective of all these things. I'm super confused, and nervous to meet up with this woman because I'm afraid she's got some weird super natural sniffer that is going to eliminate me on the spot.

 

She's assured me 99% of people smell 'fine', but I'm still unsure what this all means and would like some feedback or experience with what she may be meaning. Can it be sexual pheremones (sp?)? I thought that was something only you can sense once you're intimate - not when you casually meet someone at a cafe.

 

Thanks in advance for your support!

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There is natural pheromones; so ppl just come off as 'attractive' to others as well as 'aggressive/hostile' to some...it's just there, we can't do anything about it other than CONSTANTLY masking it with sweat (which changes it slightly) or artificially...

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Interesting. I find this topic somewhat humorous but intend to research it some more. Do *most* people come off attractive or aggressive? I've never approached someone and based these kinds of things off anything other than how they talked or acted - so its hard for me to try and conceptualize this whole concept.

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I kinda know where is this girl is coming from... even before i started my now boyfriend there was just something about the way he smelled that i loved and it really made me even more attracted him. even when he's all sweaty and gross, he still manages to smell good and it's a huge turn-on!

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The pheromones interact with each individual differently so you can't judge a person's smell by them being *mostly* liked/disliked by others...I believe most ppl are 'neutral' to others...I must say though, I have felt like hating someone for no reason whatsoever, just prefer to not be in the same room =)

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I kinda know where is this girl is coming from... even before i started my now boyfriend there was just something about the way he smelled that i loved and it really made me even more attracted him. even when he's all sweaty and gross, he still manages to smell good and it's a huge turn-on!

 

Is this because of the smell, or because you love him and regardless of how he actually smelled, you'd still crave him?

 

I suppose I'm trying to rationalize in my own mind, where these 'smells' come into the grand scheme of things. If you're emotionally attached to someone and connect with them, but then somehow find their 'smell' not 100% desirable, do you overlook this and move on? Or do you break it off and wait for the right smell to walk your way?

 

(I don't mean to sound patronizing or offensive, I'm genuinely interested in getting the perspective here!

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Is this because of the smell, or because you love him and regardless of how he actually smelled, you'd still crave him?

 

I suppose I'm trying to rationalize in my own mind, where these 'smells' come into the grand scheme of things. If you're emotionally attached to someone and connect with them, but then somehow find their 'smell' not 100% desirable, do you overlook this and move on? Or do you break it off and wait for the right smell to walk your way?

 

(I don't mean to sound patronizing or offensive, I'm genuinely interested in getting the perspective here!

 

 

Way before we even started dating when we were just coworkers I had to borrow one of his shirts (we work at an indoor soccer place so we all just wear tshirts) and the first thing i noticed was how good it smelled. obviously at this point i wasn'tin love with him, I just thought he smelled realllly good.

 

Fast forward to today, and we've been dating for over a year so obviously Im gonna love him no matter what he smells like, its just a plus that he smells good. and if somehow his smell changed i would still love him but initially it was his smell that i noticed and was attracted to.

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The fact that this conversation is even occurring I find bizarre.

 

Who doesn't notice the natural scent of another person?

 

I don't want to sound all wolf man or anything like that, but there are alot of people I decided right away whether or not I liked them based entirely on how they smelled to me.

 

Maybe smell isn't that important of a scent to you or to other here suggesting is a mix of cologne and washer detergent.

 

There probably is not a whole lot you can do to affect how this girl will interpret your scent other than try to make a good impression on her in every other department and hope she grows fond of your natural odor.

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i've had plenty of exs that said they liked my natural smell even after the gym. i could wake up hung over, feelin like crap, i think i smell, and an ex would say i smell great. just natural body odor. if you are meeting her for the first time, she might not catch a whiff of your naturalness.

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Recent studies have convincingly demonstrated that a male's scent carries a set of markers that indicate the man's ability to resist a wide variety of diseases (if I recall correctly, these markers numbered in the hundreds), and that women detect the markers in a man's scent subconsciously to select men whose resistances complement their own rather than duplicating them, thereby producing stronger offspring. This is why women often can't explain why they prefer one man's scent over that of another man ... its because their biology is helping them choose the better mate.

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I have had this experience. My most important relationship was with a man who smelled completely neutrally to me. His breath never smelled bad to me, either, even in the morning. We were just completely scent-compatible somehow. Whereas with others, it's not that the person smelled bad- it was just "off" somehow. I believe very strongly in the idea that smell can influence attraction.

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