Jump to content

Attractive GF and other Guys' Stupid Comments


MrGrinch
TikTok Advice For Relationships Suc...
TikTok Advice For Relationships Sucks

Recommended Posts

This has happened a few times to me now and looking for some advice. My GF is beautiful - 10 out of 10 knockout in my books. Today on a date she looked particularly stunning and as we walked down the street passed a group of ~8 adult men. A couple of them started shouting out remarks as we passed like "nice a**" and "wow you are built". I am not insecure... but found the remarks offensive.

 

My question is should I have confronted them about their inapproriate remarks? My GF was not dressed scantily and this was not warranted. She wasn't looking for attention... she was wearing a business suit and is just that beautiful. If I would have confronted them it may have resulted in an altercation... and a situation that I probably would have regretted being outnumbered 8 to 1. On the other hand if I don't say something is it a sign of weakness and/or disrespect to not "stick up" for your GF...? It's kind of embarrasing being put in that situation...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Confronting 8 guys who are boorish enough to make those kind of comments to HER in YOUR presence sounds like a bad idea. I think you did exactly the right thing. Assure her next time that they are indeed right, she is stunning, but that they are being crude with their remarks (thereby illustrating by contrast what a gentleman YOU are by reserving those comments to your own private moments!).

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I usually send withering looks in the direction of men like that and handle it myself with selective commentary on their lack of class. Mostly I ignore it, and I suspect she does as well, probably used to it.

 

Now if they were approaching her or being aggressive, that's a whole other thing.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

just completely ignore them. when guys hit on me, i just don't look at them or their general direction. i would prefer it if my company does the same. there's no point making a fuss over it. if i were you, i'd just continue the conversation like nothing happened.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It's probably a much better idea that you ignored it. Unfortunately, I am not that level-headed and probably would have at least snapped back at them as acidly as possible.

 

But with morons of that caliber it very well could have escalated into violence so good on you.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thanks for the responses, folks... just ignoring it and carrying on the conversation was exactly what I did. Just felt like it was really lose-lose... say nothing and you are a wimp for not sticking up for your GF... say something and potentially get your block knocked off.

 

For the record, I can hold my own in a scuffle. I am 6'0" and 205 lbs, weight lift 5 times a week, and scrap in hockey every now and then... but I'm smart enough to know that mouthing back to 8 guys (who BTW were roadies sitting outside a concert hall) would probably be pushing my luck.

 

Glad I posted this thread since it reinforces my thinking too.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Wait a minute...how is saying something "sticking up for your gf"? What were you supposed to say? They were not insulting her. Now if they said "look at that fat whale", that is a totally different story.

 

And yes, at least you were smart enough not to say something stupid. I dont care if you lift 9 days a week...8 dudes would have destroyed you.

 

BTW...guys are guys. I have friends that will say something to the ugliest women, just to say something.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If those remarks bother your gf, then you can approach the guys. However if they dont bother her, then leave it and say something kinky to her when someone comments on her beauty

However if thoe comments bother you, then u can also aproach the guys, but then you might come accross overprotective.

I myself dont mind remarks like that, they are def ego-boosting, so i think its up to ur gf.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It is offensive to her, it is disrespectful, trangresses her boundaries, and can be intimidating. This is, I hope, what concerns you, and more so than your male ego (did I look insecure? did I look weak for not confronting them?...).

 

the fact that your gf was dressed appropriatelly doesn't surprise me. those under-educated, inappropriate and intimidating men act that way because they are that way, not because she provoked it. (tho I think some women do enjoy the attention and do dress inappropriatelly, but that's a whole other story...)

 

I think you did the right thing for not confronting them. You are right, they could have hurt you or at least made you see that you were outnumbered and that they could hurt you and that would be humiliating, to you and to your ego in front of the gf you love (and let's face it, you want her to know that you could protect her should she need it). I think the important thing is to let your gf know that you respect her, that YOU view her as a respect worthy, beautiful person, and NOT as a piece of meat as those guys do. I think that is what counts. Those men know they are intimidating, they know they are degrading her and that you cannot do anything (you are outnumbered, in a public place - so the whole situation is embarassing,...) they know it and their little male ego is getting a kick out of it.

 

It happenned with my now ex, same type of situation, on a busy street, the workers were above us, we were walking, (and I don't dress like a scank either), and then when my bf said something back, the man said "ya, she's a * * * * * ..." ... I felt so degraded... it's a catch 22. If you say something and stand up for her, you risk assault (because if you take the woman's side you are a p*ssy or something ... that's how they think) and it will make matters not better, but if you don't say something, you feel small and insecure for not "protecting" her. So try to feel strong from within and ignore them, and talk to her and tell her how you feel and how much she really means to you. that you do not see her as they do. and that she doesn't deserve that. Explain to her why you think it is better that you just ignore them. does that make sense?

 

those guys feel weak and are just looking for an ego boost. screw them.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If those remarks bother your gf, then you can approach the guys. However if they dont bother her, then leave it and say something kinky to her when someone comments on her beauty

However if thoe comments bother you, then u can also aproach the guys, but then you might come accross overprotective.

I myself dont mind remarks like that, they are def ego-boosting, so i think its up to ur gf.

 

what do you find ego boosting in "nice ass"? it's disrespectful, isn't it?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

what do you find ego boosting in "nice ass"? it's disrespectful, isn't it?

 

"Nice ass" is a compliment in any way you look at it. Would you say "nice eyes" is disrespectful? Probably not.

 

Either way, if she wasn't upset about the remarks crack a joke. Give her ass a smack and say, "yep, indeed nice ass". Or something like that. If that were to happen to me it shows that my bf is proud to have me and albeit the comments a little much,he sort of likes knowing that his gf is hot even to other men.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I usually never say anything in that situation, its just pointless. They are looking for you to confront them so you look like an idiot in front of your girl. Now if they came up and started hitting on her right in front of me that would be a whole different ball game and I wouldn't think twice about standing up to all 8.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"Nice ass" is a compliment in any way you look at it. Would you say "nice eyes" is disrespectful? Probably not.

 

oh sorry, stupid me... I should know there's only one wayt o look at things and that mine is wrong... I'm so dumb. Guess I shuold rely on my nice ass more.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"Nice ass" is a compliment in any way you look at it. Would you say "nice eyes" is disrespectful? Probably not.

 

Either way, if she wasn't upset about the remarks crack a joke. Give her ass a smack and say, "yep, indeed nice ass". Or something like that. If that were to happen to me it shows that my bf is proud to have me and albeit the comments a little much,he sort of likes knowing that his gf is hot even to other men.

 

Man, I would find that SO offensive, from the workers and more so from my BF. I'd get a cab and go home alone. Sorry, I have a whole lot more self-respect than to tolerate being treated as you describe.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

For what it is worth, I think you did the right thing.

 

However, you should have this discussion with your girlfriend and discuss with her the appropriate way to handle that kind of behavior from other men. If she is a really good looking girl, she is probably used to the comments.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

oh sorry, stupid me... I should know there's only one wayt o look at things and that mine is wrong... I'm so dumb. Guess I shuold rely on my nice ass more.

 

Easy with the attitude, I'm not allowed to express the other way to look at things? "Sorry, stupid me".

 

Sure, it's not the nicest way to express that your rear end looks good, but looking good is looking good. How should my boyfriend express his love for my ass? "Excuse me love, your rear end is really wonderful looking?" or "nice ass baby". Thanks, I'll take the latter.

 

It has nothing to do with "self respect". I respect my self and my temple plenty. How is my boyfriend smacking my ass getting treated with disrespect? He's my boyfriend, he's allowed to touch my ass!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"Nice ass" is a compliment in any way you look at it. Would you say "nice eyes" is disrespectful? Probably not.

 

Either way, if she wasn't upset about the remarks crack a joke. Give her ass a smack and say, "yep, indeed nice ass". Or something like that. If that were to happen to me it shows that my bf is proud to have me and albeit the comments a little much,he sort of likes knowing that his gf is hot even to other men.

 

the comment came from unknown men on the street, to which you suggest her bf should do what is quoted above. ya I do find that disrespectful and I think that the attitude come from you in the first place because you come accross like it's your way of seieng things or nothing.

 

so anyway I disagree with you either way, we just see things differently.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Oh, man, was that you? Small world...LOL. Just kidding, of course.

 

LOL... trust me... you would not have wanted to be or look like any of these characters!!

 

Thanks again for the responses everyone. Yes, I am sure she is used to these comments so she hopefully has thick skin. Whenever we go out all the guys gawk at her which I really loathe. Again, not insecure!! Just really bugs me to know that so many guys are undressing her with their eyes going from head to toe, then back up from toe to head with their wife standing right next to them... I am kinda chuckling with the visual as I type this... but it really does bug me!! #-o

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"Nice ass" is a compliment in any way you look at it. Would you say "nice eyes" is disrespectful? Probably not.

 

Either way, if she wasn't upset about the remarks crack a joke. Give her ass a smack and say, "yep, indeed nice ass". Or something like that. If that were to happen to me it shows that my bf is proud to have me and albeit the comments a little much,he sort of likes knowing that his gf is hot even to other men.

 

i'd slap my guy upside his head if he ever smacked my ass and said that when other strange men are cat-calling. it's really disrespectful and low-class. it's like being treated like a piece of meat.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ok, as a woman I would find remarks such as nice ass to be ego boosting but demeaning, I am not a prostitute, porn star or a glamour model. Some men need lessons in how to respect an actual women, just because they picked up their manners from reading common lads magazines doesn't mean that respectful people should have to put up with it(I am not saying porn is bad btw, I like porn. It's just not something a respectable person does really.)

 

I very much believe these men could never hope to pick up a woman with any substance. Shame for them, a real woman knows how to be good in the kitchen but very very bad(in a good way) in bed lol.

 

I think the OP did the right thing. It would be less impressive trying to start a fight with eight men than it would be taking the higher ground and behaving like he has more than peanuts, fhm magazines and air between his ears.

 

My boyfriend puts his arm around me and holds me close when men look at me/ have the balls to say anything. I like that more than a boarish man who starts fights on a whim. He's protective of me and showing his desire to show others that I am his girlfriend It's sweet and shows that he cares.

 

MyNameIsBear .

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Whenever we go out all the guys gawk at her which I really loathe. Again, not insecure!! Just really bugs me to know that so many guys are undressing her with their eyes going from head to toe, then back up from toe to head with their wife standing right next to them... I am kinda chuckling with the visual as I type this... but it really does bug me!! #-o

 

Just know that they are all jealous of what you have! And even though they might be undressing her with their eyes, just remember that you're the only one that gets to literally undress her... So you're definitely the winner in this situation lol

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
×
×
  • Create New...