A Calling: To seek or to deny?

[ConfusedKitty]

I have a question. If you feel a strong calling to embrace a culture that is not your own, do you go for it or deny it?

 

Ever since I was young, I have really loved anything Asian, more specifically: Japanese and Chinese art. It evolved into something more, and I found my way over to learning the ways of Japanese language, and more recently Chinese philosophy. Now, just by reading some works of the Tao, I have made a change in my life that is amazing, I'm calmer, happier, and man does it feel awesome.

 

Problem is, I'm embracing a culture that is not my own. Not even remotely close to my own. For a long time I was fine with this and didn't even think about it, but some inner demon that seems to not want to go away is making me wonder, what the heck am I doing?

 

Inner demon says if I get too far into enjoying myself I'll want to visit. Then, I'll get there and everyone will stare, laugh, hate. Even here, if I fully embrace that culture like I want, people will stare and laugh at this heavy set black chick walking around speaking Japanese and taking Tai Chi.

 

Sure I don't know if that will happen but, it's definitely a fear. I don't know what to do, part of me really really wants to just be happy studying what I like and doing the things I like doing but the fear is overwhelming me.

 

I think at this point I just need someone to say it's okay and to just go have fun :sad:

[shikashika]

For some reason, I knew this was going to be about Japan before I even opened the thread.

 

 

I lived in Japan for a few years and there are a lot of Japanophiles who go over there as well.

 

why not move there for a bit and try it out?

 

Have you been there?

 

You may like the image that Japan projects but would be completely different if you were living there and working in a Japanese company.

 

What are your qualifications?

[Beautiful Nightmare]

It is okay and you should have fun. If it makes you happy then you should do it. Life is too short to fill it with regrets.

[Binoo]

I don't think there's anything wrong with what you're doing.

If someone from another country were to embrace my culture, I would be flattered and I would love to help them learn all they could.

I do understand that there are people who don't feel this way but you're certainly not making a mockery of their culture. You've been researching it for a long time and it makes you happy. Nothing wrong with that at all.

[quirky]

I'm surprised you even THINK it's wrong! I wonder why the fear is there...need for belonging? Clearly it makes you feel good, do not predict future disasters, I actually think you might be able to inspire others. As for what people say you'll never be able to please everyone, NEVER. I dress unusually and write unusual music and think unusually (as my user name indicates!) I always knew I wouldn't be part of the majority, of a crowd. It's made me so happy to follow my own path and not be told what I SHOULD be, you meet the right people along the way and you WILL inspire others as well

[ConfusedKitty]

I'm surprised you even THINK it's wrong! I wonder why the fear is there...need for belonging? Clearly it makes you feel good, do not predict future disasters, I actually think you might be able to inspire others. As for what people say you'll never be able to please everyone, NEVER. I dress unusually and write unusual music and think unusually (as my user name indicates!) I always knew I wouldn't be part of the majority, of a crowd. It's made me so happy to follow my own path and not be told what I SHOULD be, you meet the right people along the way and you WILL inspire others as well

 

Hmm, the need for belonging. That could possibly be it. I know on my journey I have to deal with that, and this could possibly be a part of it. I decided yesterday that nothing is going to keep me from being happy, regardless of how odd I may look to someone else. And it came to me also this:

 

I don't think Lao Tzu who began the teachings of the Tao Te Ching, or Buddha, or the creators of the Zen sect of Buddhism, would ever refuse anyone who wishes to learn the way of the universe or discover who they are inside. I honestly can't see one of them saying, "you there, with your different looks and different backgrounds, go away, my knowledge is not for you!". I just can't see it. Who would refuse someone knowledge if they were truly out to help others? I am going to hold on to that and just do what I feel is truly natural.

 

So thanks you guys for answering my question, I just really needed to have someone else understand