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feel down...How to adjust myself?


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I'm not feeling down recently. the reasons are:

 

1. I don't like my job, I don't feel I'm learning anything from it, not respected but with the current economy, I've to stay.

2. work is slow and drying out, if I lose my job then I can't stay here legally. and it's so hard to find a new job now.

3. I'm almost 29, I don't have a bf. the guy I'm dating is acting hot and cold, he can go one week without contacting me.

4. I don't have a lot of friends here. some close friends moved away, some have families, some are too far away. also I don't go out with coworkers often, I don't understand their jokes, and seldom feel at ease with them.

5. I'm worrying about a lot of things.

 

I think I'm a happy person, but I'm feeling down recently for the above reasons which I can't change or control. how do you adjust yourself? thank you.

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JP,

 

You've made a good first step, opening up and realizing how you feel. Many people aren't able to verbalize to the extent you have. That's good. Very healthy.

 

It seems everyone has episodes of the same feelings. I know I certainly do. I wish I had a magic formula to share or some magic tools or tips. Unfortunately, talking ourselves out of the doldrums seems to be one of life's mysteries. Yet, some people do indeed know how.

 

I think one of the secrets is learning to talk to yourself. Are you in the habit of speaking negatively to yourself, vocalizing your worries and doubts? If so, try just the opposite. Find some good things in your life (everyone has them...you have to look! LOL) and begin to talk to yourself about them. Perhaps you are pretty; learn to say to yourself, "I am blessed with my looks." While that may sound arrogant, remember you are talking to YOURSELF. I wouldn't recommend doing this in front of others. Soon, you'll discover a whole long list of things that are good to say.

 

Next, learn to compartmentalize those negative things. Altogether, they look ominous; but, taken one at a time, they can be rationalized away pretty easily. For instance, you still have a job so that's really not a concern right now. Once you quit worrying about that, the issue of staying in the country also goes away. So work on just one worry at a time. Many people advocate taking one worry and following it to its worst possible outcome. E.g., "I lose my job. I go back to my original country. I get a job there. etc." Often, seeing things at their logical "worst end" helps us see that wouldn't be so bad afterall.

 

Finally, don't sit and ponder too long on all this. Instead, get up and do something for yourself or a friend. Nothing helps us feel better like doing something for someone else. Take small steps toward small goals and soon you'll feel yourself moving ahead.

 

You can do this. It's normal, it's common, and it's beatable. Hang in there.

 

All the best.

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thanks, Will. now I feel better. I think in general, I feel down just because life gets bored and there's nothing I can do to get it to be what I want exactly. maybe if life is perfect, it becomes imperfect.... thanks for the great advices, I think I sure can come up with a long list of things I'm proud of or happy about and small steps I can take. and sometimes after a few years, looking back, you'll find the petty things you were so obssessed with were actually not important at all.... so I'll learn to chill on the things I'm obsessed or worried about now.

 

thanks again and my best wishes to you!

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50+ Best Feeling Down Quotes
50+ Best Feeling Down Quotes

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