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New GF just lost close sibling to tragedy...

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I've been dating woman a for month or so. She just lost younger sister to terrible, sudden tragedy a few days ago. I'm deeply sad for her...seeing her in pain is unbearable.


I care for her and really falling for her, although I was very nervous about moving fast with her before loss. She had a tough divorce a couple years back, and it seems like she needs to get settled in her life before a serious relationship. However, this is much worse than the divorce. Her little sister was a like a child to her.


I really see a serious relationship with her at some point. What worries me is that she won't deal with this before a healthy relationship. All of a sudden she acts like she is deeply in love with me.


Should I tell her its not a good time to get deep into relationship?

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It's natural especially when she can rely on someone that needs deep emotional support. If you love this woman, do what you can to help her and of course cherish her sister's memory with time.


My g/f had to go through the same thing losing her younger sister (24) to an accident. As strong as she is, she still has her days after a year and I don't blame her at all. If I lost my younger sister I'd be in a complete wreck. I cannot imagine what she's going through.


Listen to her and give her lots of hugs...

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I'm so sorry. But it's great of you to come here and ask about it before running from it! That makes you much more man than the boyfriend I had when my father died. He was sweet until it happened, and then he had to party all weekend the weekend I came back from the funeral and couldn't be bothered to even see me. She just really needs support like everyone else said. It doesn't mean you have to be any more serious than you were before it happened- it just means be there for her as yourself, as you have been before this happened! I don't think she will latch onto you, she's just looking for what you must already have provided. This is when people need support the most, but it doesn't mean it will get too serious real fast all of a sudden, don't worry.

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tragedy loss and trauma tend to make people express their feelings stronger then usual. just support her right now and be there for her...it will take time for her to heal. dont worry too much about what she says...she is finding something to cling to for strength, and you are that support for her right now. You appear strong to her, when she is extremely weak. when things get back to "normal' (using that term very loosely!) she will get back to a normal stride in the relationship. Be there for her now, be gentle and tender, and extremely strong. even if the relationship goes nowhere, she will respect you for your actions and behavior at this time.

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