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the benefit of dating slow


jpmartin

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from my own experience, dating slow helps me to maintain my emotional stability, continuing other things in life, using brain to get to know the person and it helps same pace of both emotional and physical progress... also, not involved too soon both emotionally and physically helps to meet, compare new people too...

 

well actually I got too attached too soon but he wants to go slow(both physical and emotional), since I like him a lot, so I think I'm going to adjust myself, and I did. I'm just wondering whether the chemistry will disappear or we won't ever know each other well if we go too slow (say meeting once a week, no communication in between?)

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i'm not a slow dater. i mean, i don't want to get to know everything about them right off the bat, but i'd like to know their personality so i can tell if we are compatible. opportunity walks by every day. i'd rather not waste too much time if it isn't going to work. everyone has their own pace though.

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I don't know about not communicating in between dates. You could loose interest I would. That seems to slow if you aren't even talking other than on date night. There is slow and then there is dying. Try to at least talk once during the week and you should be fine. What is wrong with a phone call once a week, or just a "hey how are you?" text message just to touch base?

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I don't know about not communicating in between dates. You could loose interest I would. That seems to slow if you aren't even talking other than on date night. There is slow and then there is dying. Try to at least talk once during the week and you should be fine. What is wrong with a phone call once a week, or just a "hey how are you?" text message just to touch base?

 

Taking is important, so I definitely agree with the above. If you are only meeting once a week for an "in person date" maybe you could add a "phone date" in as well where you spend a half-hour talking or so on another day of the week. Could also add on the getting-to-know-you phase.

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Taking is important, so I definitely agree with the above. If you are only meeting once a week for an "in person date" maybe you could add a "phone date" in as well where you spend a half-hour talking or so on another day of the week. Could also add on the getting-to-know-you phase.

 

phone date?

 

no way. IMO

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i dont like to rush things too much but at the same time i dont like to take too much time either getting to know the person. i will usually know within the first month of dating or seeing someone if i want to continue getting to know them. There were a couple people last year that wanted to take it slow and it ended up being a total waste of time. Dont go to slow or intrest may be lost.

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I disagree. IMO, if a man is only calling me once a week, he's not that interested.

 

Just my 2cents worth.......

 

How often would you like a new guy to call you in the beginning stages of dating?

 

(just curious)

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thanks for the input. I'm not a slow dater either, so when I start going out with this guy, I think he's either not that into me or has other things going on in his life, he just shows me enough interest to keep me hang in there.it's not fair and I was frustrated

 

but after we slowly getting to know each other, I find dating slow actually make sense. firstly, I'd respect a guy who makes effort to get to know me instead of jumping into bed; secondly, to myself, I'm emotionally attached but it does take time for me to feel emotionally stable and safe with him.my ex called me every day, appeared very responsible but bailed out by disappearing on me.

 

yeah, I think interest can be lost if going to slow. esp. you both don't communicate well.

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