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My X girlfriend and I broke up 5 months ago after having dated 3 years. I was the one to end it with her because of trust issues I always seemed to have. She never cheated on me, that i know of, but she did lie to me a few times about where she was and I found myself not trusting in her at all that she was telling me the truth.

 

The 3 months after we broke if off were great for me. Had a ton of friends and found myself doing a ton of drinking. I got it out of her one morning that was seeing another guy and it was at that moment i realized just how in love I was with this girl. I did everything i could to try to get her back.

 

The first few weeks she was cheating on her boyfriend with me but at the end of the day she would end up going back to him telling me she is confused and doesn't have a clue of what she wants. A couple of times she has been a * * * * * to me when she is around him but when he is at work she usually calls me and says things things like "I love you" or "I miss you" Etc. Anytime we do see each other lately everything is great but after awhile we both become bitter and bring up all the things that have upset us since the breakup which usually turns into an argument. For the past couple of weeks I have been waking up sick to my stomach in the early morning with the thought of those two together. A big part of me does feel like i deserve it because of the roller coaster of emotions I put that girl through. She tells me she still wants to be good friends because I am everything to her but it has come with a huge price. What do you think i should do. I can't stop thinking about her.

 

Do any of you think she is going to open her eyes and realize she would rather get back together with me then lose me forever? If we do get back together I am scared to think we could not go back to how things used to be because of all the heartache we put each other through. If any of you have experienced anything like this can you please tell me how everything did or did not work out. I just need to know weather or not I am a fool for allowing myself to open my heart to her time and time again knowing I am going to be hurt. Is any of this worth it?

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In my opinion, I don't think that it is worth all the heartache of trying to work things out with her. As you can see, if she has already cheated on her boyfriend to be with you, and then turning around and stating that she is confused, more or so likely she will continue leaving you confused. She is just having her cake and eating it too, and unfortunately you're allowing her to treat you this way. Why would you want to feel as though you have to work for her affection? Hypothetically speaking, you guys did get back together, would you really let it go that she was going out with someone and yet cheating on him to be with you? Can you honestly state that you won't wonder if she would be doing the same to you? Sure, I know you're hurt right now and you miss her, but in reality, if you continue doing what you're doing I guarantee you will just be hurting a lot more than you are doing now. If there wasn't any trust to begin with, why would you think that there will be in the long run if you guys did get back together? Just my two cents. Please think about it before you allow yourself to fall any deeper. Good luck.

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From my own personal experience, no, I do not think it's worth it. You've already come this far, why go back? You said it yourself, things have been great for you.

 

She cheated on her boyfriend with you. What does that show you about her? Just because it was with you doesn't justify it. Cheating is cheating.

 

I'd save yourself the heartache qne I'd continue to live a great life.

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Thanks for the advice. Its going to be hard to try and move on but you both are right. How could I possibly trust a girl who had no problem hooking up with me then going back to her b/f. She continues to play these mind games with me and i do allow her too. I hate having someone in control of me. Love is defiantly the greatest feeling to have toward someone but it also hurts the worse.

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