ljoy74 Posted March 1, 2009 Share Posted March 1, 2009 So this guy and I have been "talking." He was out of state visiting friends and family for a week so a few days after he got back I texted him to ask how his trip was. He replied a few minutes later, asking if I wanted to hang out. I couldn't leave my house at that moment so he came over and we had a great time playing around for a few hours (yes playing, not fooling). He admitted to me the next day in a text message that he chickened out on kissing me. We had a convo about it, just being honest with each other about liking one another. So that was 4 days ago... I haven't heard anything from him since. He doesn't work weekends so I'm sure he has been up to to much. He also hasn't lived in the area long so he doesn't know very many people. Did he lose interest? Is he playing some kind of game? BLAH. I thought he was really interested and now this... I don't chase boys so maybe that is what he's waiting for. So please, some sort of insight on boys and games and what not would be much appreciated! Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted March 1, 2009 Share Posted March 1, 2009 I would contact him. He probably is wondering the same thing. Link to comment
cruzer Posted March 1, 2009 Share Posted March 1, 2009 u could just text him hey whats up or something, see if that gets him talking to you one day. but if u dont chase boys... then dont text him, dont see what could happen and dont be happy. your call Link to comment
VerdeShimmer Posted March 1, 2009 Share Posted March 1, 2009 My advice is to call him not text to see if he wants to do something with you this weekend. Also yes boys do play games see: Link to comment
JeckyllNHyde Posted March 1, 2009 Share Posted March 1, 2009 I see no harm in sending a "hi, how are you?" You don't have to always text first but once in a while doesn't hurt. Oh and like she^^^ said, yes they play games. Girls do too lol. Me and my bf had a game going on, and he purposely didn't kiss me until I made the move. We both openly showed we where interested yet everytime he wouldn't kiss me. However, the rest of his actions showed me he was very much interested and he didn't play games in ALL aspects, which is important I feel. (He'd text me first alot of times. And when I'd text first he'd openly show he was happy to see that, etc.) Link to comment
xxNPxx Posted March 1, 2009 Share Posted March 1, 2009 Most guys I know, including myself, don't play silly games unless it's to figure out something like if your seeing somebody or if you like them. But that may just be me. With just about all guys, there is hardly any game playing going on. In the situation of the OP, I say give the guy a call and explicitly state that you had fun and would like to be with him more. Even if it's in the text. Maybe he got the impression that you didn't like him. I would too. Especially if I didn't get any messages, I would assume that you weren't interested in being together more. Link to comment
redreine Posted March 2, 2009 Share Posted March 2, 2009 I don't get the point in playing games. Also, I don't understand why people say things like "He/She hasn't txtd or called me in (insert a few days here) days, what's going on?" Maybe he's thinking the same thing. Maybe he's sitting around going "Man, I thought she really liked me, and then I haven't heard from her in (insert amount of days here)days!" Also, there is a difference between chasing someone, and common courtesy. If you had a nice time with him, imo, it's disrespectful not to tell him so and ask to hang out again. You won't sound desperate, or needy, or like you're chasing him. You'll sound interested, and that will ease his mind if he's interested, too. If he isn't, then move on to the next. You haven't lost anything, because you never had it to begin with. Link to comment
ljoy74 Posted March 2, 2009 Author Share Posted March 2, 2009 So I called him and it didn't ring... it went to straight silence and started counting seconds, like it does on my phone when a call is connected. I'm thinking he's having phone issues like he has had in the past. And I did text him Friday night, some of my friends wanted me to invite him to dinner with us. I texted him once yesterday to, to invited him to my university's homecoming B-ball game because he's a b-ball fanatic. So his loss I guess... I made 3 moves, the ball is in his court now. My other thought is that this is him being distant. When we first became friends we had a convo about how we are in relationships and how he said he's never had a good girlfriend. He says his relationship's never last past a month because for those first couple weeks he's distant (I think it's b/c he's so nervous about messing things up). It would be a shame to lose him even as a friend... He's so much fun. I always enjoy his company. Link to comment
redreine Posted March 2, 2009 Share Posted March 2, 2009 I'd say his loss, definitely. And he needs to take a look at himself. All of his relationships have failed due to bad girlfriends? I think he needs to recognize the common denominator in his relationships. Link to comment
ljoy74 Posted March 2, 2009 Author Share Posted March 2, 2009 I don't know that that's why they have all failed. But he told me just to be honest that for the first month of relationships he always seems to be withdrawn and distant. And no, he and I aren't dating. Just "talking" I guess, even though I despise that term. But any ways, the ball is really in his court now. I may leave a Facebook message (there's no guarantee he got either text or the phone call) but that's it. No more. If he's interested he knows where to find me. And my birthday is in 2 days so I figure that would be the legit sign... Link to comment
ljoy74 Posted March 2, 2009 Author Share Posted March 2, 2009 MAJOR MISCOMMUNICATION! So he thought he told me he got a new phone number but he didn't. (He finally calledme Sunday) So he spent the whole weekend thinking he'd freaked me out by telling me he got to nervous to kiss me... And I spent the whole weekend thinking he'd lost interest. Wow. Link to comment
redreine Posted March 2, 2009 Share Posted March 2, 2009 See? This is why you must start out always giving people the benefit of the doubt. Link to comment
ljoy74 Posted March 3, 2009 Author Share Posted March 3, 2009 I should have known when my best friend, little sister and a guy friend were all totally boggled by the rapid change in behavior. Yikes. He's taking me out for my birthday on Thursday I will know give people the benefit of the doubt, permanently. Link to comment
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