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How do you avoid the friend zone?


The_Wanderer

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I have recently been talking a good amount with a girl I am interested in. We met through our mutual friends, who live in the same dorm with her. We see each other frequently at parties, and talk a good amount as we get to know each other better.

 

How do I avoid being shifted to the "friend zone?" We haven't known each other very long at all, and I want to make sure it doesn't happen.

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its better than being an unresponsive person, that really irritates people as ive found out with my friends lol.

 

i understand the not messaging her part. i'm wondering where you got that he is doing this. i was under the impression that he calls her or texts her. and if so, he needs to limit the texting and do more dating and asking her out. if he is IMing her, i agree, it needs to stop. if he is IMing her, blocking her would not help. some communication needs to happen.

 

OP, if you are IMing this girl and it's all you got, get her number.

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I don't IM her, and I don't have her number, yet. She lives next to my friends and comes to all the parties we throw, so I basically see her every weekend.

 

I guess I'm just too insecure to ask her out in like a formal, dating capacity? Is there any more casual way to show interest during the weekly parties we are together at? I guess it also seems to me that in my social circle (sophomores and juniors in college) formal asking-out doesn't really happen that much and would seem like too much too soon. Aah, I don't know!

 

Also, if it means anything, two of her best friends and her roommate know I am interested in her because I told them (I really hope that wasn't a foul up...) They all gave good responses and encouraged me.

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i think you're thinking too much into it and freezing up. don't think. just do it. its not really a "formal" thing to ask a girl out.

 

just say something like hey can i take you out to dinner or something..or (if u dont wanna pay cuz i realize that implies that you will be) do you wanna go grab dinner with me on thursday or something, whatever you wanna do be it dinner, movie, both, wine tasting lol whatever. true, girls and guys who are friends go out for the occasional dinner, but as you said you dont know each other all that well, so i think you asking her out to do anything is pretty much understood as a date-type thing.

 

and yeah, you can always show interest by seriously flirting and whatnot, but if you dont really act on it by asking her out then sooner or later she's just going to throw you into the friend zone.

 

and hey if her best friends are encourgaging you, go for it!! haha.

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