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Is it normal for a girlfriend to talk to me this much?


Iwantittoend

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Been going out with this girl for 2 months now. Things were rocky for awhile but they've gotten better after I called her out on her issues. We'll see how long that lasts...but anyways...

 

She texts me ALL day about what she's doing, what she wants to do, etc. Whenever I get a break in my day she calls me. The problem is I never have anything to say to her because of this. We talk TOO much. Then at the end of the day or when she does call, there's nothing and there's silence. It also gets kind of annoying having my phone vibrating all damn day.

 

Is this normal in a relationship to talk so much? I can't stand it. It's almost to the point where I want to break up with her because of it. I want my alone time but I don't know how to convey this to her without hurting her feelings.

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Have you told her this as explicitly as you wrote it here?

 

I can imagine that she is a bit insecure and needs constant reassurance. But if you explain to her that you need to focus on your daily work/ school and it has nothing to do with not being committed to her, she might understand.

 

If you were able to talk about her other issues I am sure you can talk as well about this.

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Yea, you're right...that's way too much.

 

I think you just need to come out and tell her what you said here...that you want to look forward to talking with her to tell her about your day and hear about hers, but there's no reason to talk morning, noon, and night.

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Have you told her this as explicitly as you wrote it here?

 

No, I haven't yet. But anytime I do tell her that I need to get off the phone or go work she gets pissy with me. I even remember one time I was driving over to her house and was like, "So I'm gonna get off. I'll be there soon," and she got angry saying that I must not want to talk to her because I always do that!!

 

I just don't see the point in talking on the phone with each other when you're going to see them within 10 minutes.

 

I hate phones. I could do without them to be honest.

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Instead of telling her when you are on the phone with her, have a chat with her in person when you are both in a relaxed mood and speak about this calmly that you need to do other things during your day as well and that you don't have time to be texting and on the phone all day.

 

Often the delivery makes a huge difference. If you tell her while you are on the phone, she might get insecure because she doesn't understand why you need to have to get off the phone while you will be too impatient in this moment to explain it in a calm way, so you both end up being annoyed with each other.

 

If you tell her in person she can see for herself that you are not trying to limit the time between you and you are telling her in advance what your needs are.

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Tell her you can't afford a huge texting plan and your boss is getting mad that he sees you texting all day, so now you can only do it on your breaks. And space out your responses. Send one text in the morning, one at lunch, one in the afternoon. She'll get used to it.

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You want to break up with her for everything she's done. Frankly, I think you shoudl, not just b/c you're always too annoyed with her but also b/c she's always got an attitude with you. you haven't said one good thing about her since you started dating her! it's all too much for such a short relationship. You still don't need to be so unhappy in such a short relationship. End it!

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I like the idea of telling her you do not have a texting plan and the texts are really adding up. Some people by nature are avid texters, callers or emailers, sounds like she is all of the above. YOu have to find a commonground with your communication styles. Just ask her or tell her your texting plan is limited and it is costing you a mint to continue this. I am sure she will understand if she respects your opinion.

 

I agree with those who said this thing at two months being so rocky is a sign of incompatibilty.

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