Jump to content

Nearly 5 months now


confused_255

Recommended Posts

as the title says im 1 week shy of 5 months in NC since my ex gf and first love broke it off with me. i was extremely messed up and considering suicide after i realized what a hole my life had become.

 

to sum it up real quick for you guys, i was arrest on many charges drugs/weapon/assault related back in july of last year, i was a heavy drug user, and even though all of this i doubt the reason she broke up with me was because of that, i think she was just immature (not saying i wasn't, just in a different way). i found out i could be going to jail for a total of up to 9 years in a federal prison. We were very much in love with each other and then her old best friend came back into the picture and everything changed.

 

After hitting rock bottom, losing everything, money, my love, my family (most of them), my friends, my self-respect and pride, and my integrity, i realized that to gain some of it back. I accepted God into my life and i realized that if i wanted any control over my own life back had to go into No contact, this was the hardest thing i ever did, i stared at her pictures for hours crying, luckily my mother gave me a job after all this happened who i am still working for currently, i would not show up i would just be sitting on my couch for days crying and listening to music and staring at her picture.

 

well 5 months has gone by and i rarely think of her, i have my old self back now, the one before her and before drugs, the one i liked, i still love her but now its so much esaier to moved on, i needed no contact to step back and look at the picture of how i was treated in the relationship and how i treated her and things i need to change and apply differently to the next relationship.

 

i am happy to tell you all that my court case is on march24 of this year, and i will not be seeing any jail time, due to my lawyer being great, all the time i spent volunteering since then and proving to the community that i wnt to change. before all this i was a paramedic, but i will never be able to do that again, i regret that but since i have shown a vast improvement i am going to get house arrest. I am happy again and i have had many offers with new women as they can see my spirits have picked up i appreciate all of your guys help since i ve been on the site and i want to tell you all that if you stick with no contact the person who was crying nonstop and thought you could never make it and you didn;t want to let them go, can turn into someone who is ready to take on the world head on.

 

im putting myself back on the market and i think im ready to try again !

 

thank you again all and the way i have turned my life around i owe primarily to the help i have received simply about my lovelife from this forum. Thank you for bringing me out of my hole when i thought i could never beat the rockshower falling upon me.

 

edit: im not sure that this post clarifies the gratitude i have for the help i have received here and i hoipe you all percieve the fact that i have done everything i can to change my life and make a difference, and the happiness level i have no then before just because of no contact allowing me to forget everything related to her, which was a large part of my drug dealing/using etc. i am very happy now and i work a regular job, well not regular haha i work a ridiculous amount and hvae time for nothing else but it keeps me out of trouble

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thank you muchly, it hasn't been an easy journey but im feeling that the worst is nearly over. Just keep your head up and dont get discouraged when things are rough and you will make it through, and remember when something goes wrong, its only one chapter in your life, make the next one count.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Confused

 

Nice one fella - sounds like you are really getting your life back together. Never go back to those crappy days eh? Keep off the mind altering stuff cos that will screw you good and proper - you know this.

 

Just try and be the real you because you sound deep down like a really decent bloke.

 

I know you miss her but keep on this path because it is the right one. If you are taking solace in your god and that is helping then carry on with that - anything that helps you is good.

 

Keep it up mate.

 

Mark

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Confused

 

Nice one fella - sounds like you are really getting your life back together. Never go back to those crappy days eh? Keep off the mind altering stuff cos that will screw you good and proper - you know this.

 

Just try and be the real you because you sound deep down like a really decent bloke.

 

I know you miss her but keep on this path because it is the right one. If you are taking solace in your god and that is helping then carry on with that - anything that helps you is good.

 

Keep it up mate.

 

Mark

 

thanks for your post man, its still rough sometimes i think about her but the feelings are not nearly as intense and im hoping to have a girl over at my place tomorrow night

Link to comment
Share on other sites

..

How did it go? Do you like her?

 

it went well, lol she was way to get-up-and-go for me though i mean considering i am gonna be on house arrest i cant do anything, so i need someone who just wants to relax and watch movies lol

 

i still thought of my ex after i met up with the new girl though which kind of ticked me off because i want to be over her completely. We're going to see each other this weekend again so we will see

Link to comment
Share on other sites

How to leave an abusive relationshi...
How to leave an abusive relationship and why it's so hard

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...