I Messed Up BIG time..

[KJ2008]

I had a very good friend that happened to be a girl, and I've been very attracted to her before I met my current g/f. This girl and I have talked and gone through spurts of being around each other for many years, and I recently, I think I lost her friendship for good!

 

What happened was I gave her a few complements on Facebook about her looks, and she told me that I shouldn't do it, because I have a g/f, which is obviously reasonable. But I guess I got carried away and went on to tell her how much she actually meant to me and she replied with a "I dont think we should talk anymore" message.. I happen to have an AIM logger and was just reading the talks we used to have and this girl is just great, and just all around a better person than my current g/f and I'd probably say that I'd end my current relationship just to have this other girl as a friend again..

 

Do you think this girl will ever want to be my friend again? Its so confusing because she sent me signals plenty of times when we hung out before, but she also doesn't know what she wants. I hope everything works out ok. I tried apologizing but she never responded..I just miss my friend..

[Radίaηce]

ahem...i think you like your friend if you are willing to leave your current girlfriend, you must REALLY like her. I think you should 1- break up with your current girl, just beacause after reading this text it honestly doesnt sound like you like her enough to be with her 2-break up with her because it's the right thing to do. Don't strand someone along just because of loneliness. 3-Take some time for yourself. It looks like you could use it. To sort things out. Give it at least a month...to figure out what you want. If you still want your "friend" then initiate contact with her and let her know how you feel. It's not right to play with peoples feelings, and it's not right to deny your own.

[Grace]

Oh your poor girlfriend, I agree I think your first priority is to be upfront with your girlfriend about how you feel, it's in no way fair to string her along. I would find it quite disrespectful if my boyfriend frequently complimented another girl on in a public venue, particularly if he had feelings for her.

 

If I were your friend I would be wary of entering a relationship, lest in the future you found a girl who you thought was even more great and an even all around better person, and handled the situation similarly...

[addictedblue]

I know this wasn't the purpose for your thread, but I'm just saying that it does not seem like you care about your girlfriend at all. Secondly, the "friend" probably won't date you because she knows that you compliment other girls' looks while you're already in a relationship. She doesn't want you doing that to her. I say you should just stay single for a while. If you still want the "friend" then try and get with her then.

[KJ2008]

its not really even about dating my friend..she was pretty much my best friend, and I think I screwed it up. She was one to help me through tough times with my current relationship sometimes and was someone I could talk to more openly than my girlfriend. Im just wondering if anyone thinks us being friends again is possible.

[Radίaηce]

Anything is possible...but i just re-read my comment earlier and i would take my own advice once again...

[lost1607307474]

She probably feels bad because you have a girlfriend and she doesn't want to get in the middle of a relationship... if a guy with a girlfriend started telling me that he had deep feelings for me then I would probably back away as well because I wouldn't want to be the cause of a messy situation.

 

I think you need to tell this girl EXACTLY how you feel - that you would even be willing to leave your current relationship for her. Then, see what her response is to that. And work things out from there.