Change of person

[S agapo]

What turns them into someone so spiteful, who ones was caring towards you?

 

They want to dig at you and make you feel really cold.

 

What is about them that changes their charactor towards You when you know you were a good decent girlfriend to them?

 

I really dont want to get replies telling to 'why does it matter' 'your not together, forget about him' I know all this.

 

But I am wondering why do they become so spiteful when they dump you to begin with, or lied, or pretended or weren't sure but carried on with you, and make you feel that you did wrong at the end?!

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Their own insecurity, unhappiness with their life, self-loathing.

[S agapo]

Their own insecurity, unhappiness with their life, self-loathing.

 

 

Thats what i think they go through. I want to feel sorry for him, but then again don't cos he made his decision and made his bed.

 

Its just sad that they want to make you feel unpleasant and want to have a dig at you.

 

Guess I am trying and wanting to understand what they (dumpers) may be going through on a Psychological / deeper level to why they act like this

[Dosed]

I think the main one, that I have been able to work out when I've taken a step back from past situations is that it all comes down to the ego.

 

Lots of people get an overinflated sense of self when they end a relationship with someone and quite often they take on an alternate persona that is quite arrogant. I think that's why you see quite alot of people on here saying that their ex isn't the person they knew/loved.

 

For me personally, I view this type of act with a benign grin on my face because it actually shows quite a sad and immature person.

 

Trust me on this, you don't want to be wrapped up in someone who acts this way post break-up. You are far better than that.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

I think the main one, that I have been able to work out when I've taken a step back from past situations is that it all comes down to the ego.

 

Lots of people get an overinflated sense of self when they end a relationship with someone and quite often they take on an alternate persona that is quite arrogant. I think that's why you see quite alot of people on here saying that their ex isn't the person they knew/loved.

 

For me personally, I view this type of act with a benign grin on my face because it actually shows quite a sad and immature person.

 

Trust me on this, you don't want to be wrapped up in someone who acts this way post break-up. You are far better than that.

 

That really sums it up quite nicely.

[keenan]

I think the main one, that I have been able to work out when I've taken a step back from past situations is that it all comes down to the ego.

 

Lots of people get an overinflated sense of self when they end a relationship with someone and quite often they take on an alternate persona that is quite arrogant. I think that's why you see quite alot of people on here saying that their ex isn't the person they knew/loved.

 

For me personally, I view this type of act with a benign grin on my face because it actually shows quite a sad and immature person.

 

Trust me on this, you don't want to be wrapped up in someone who acts this way post break-up. You are far better than that.

 

So true! This is ONE good thing about guys who stay on good terms with their ex-girlfriends. It's obviously NOT great that there are ex-girlfriends who periodically show up and say hi (although hopefully it's with their husbands and kids in tow), but it is pretty cool to be with a guy who is such a down-to-earth gentleman during the break-up process that his ex-girlfriends (the dumpees) still regard him, fundamentally, as a good, sound, caring person. In other words, to be with somebody who doesn't completely lose himself in that cold, arrogant, post-breakup personality transplant bubble is reassuring and speaks in favor of his character and strong sense of self (as one piece of evidence in a much larger mountain of evidence, of course).