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Were we meant to be together?


jxl
All I Ever Wanted Was to Love You
All I Ever Wanted Was to Love You

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So, I thought I’d just put this out there to see what people have to say.

 

We are all on this part of the forum because we have some troubles in relationships, with our ex’s, problems communicating or things we are worried about, however this got me thinking. I’m of the opinion that every human being on the planet is unique and thereforee we are all different so by two people being in a relationship our very differences is what will create our issues and it will mean that communication between the two parties will be the key to a healthy relationship.

 

I’m not saying that opposites attract or that two people that are the same will attract because in the end we are all different and this is what makes for the great highs but also the great lows in a relationship.

 

I’m just wondering thereforee if difficulties are just part of being in a relationship or do you believe there is someone out there that everything will be perfect with. No arguments, troubles or upsets. Also, how come some people are willing to work on a relationship and some people see any slight rumble as a reason that you’re not meant to be and thereforee run away.

 

I’m sorry if these seem like deep questions, as if I’m looking for answers to age old questions but I’m in a pretty thoughtful mood.

 

My stance is that relationships take constant work if you are to keep them healthy/long and bad times will actually just make you stronger (of course within reason). However is it my view that is making me stay in relationships which maybe other people would have left which is why I am always the one who is left wanting more. Should I be more discerning at the beginning of a relationship as to who I choose. I’m not saying I’d enter a relationship with anyone, I’m actually quite fussy but when I find someone who I think is awesome and I’m attracted to I perhaps am blinkered to issues about there personality which might cause me problems later down the line…..

 

Any thoughts, insight would be interesting……..thanks

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I believe that it is important for those two people in a relationship to want similar things out of the relationship. Also, I also feel that couples should work on their relationships, the issues that might break their relationship or cause it to turn sour.

 

It is one thing to be attracted to someone. Being in a relationship takes much more work, and you will never stop working on a relationship til the day you die. It's not enough to just be in love. I don't have the answers but a lot comes to play when we're in a relationship: Commitment, compromise, sacrifice..things like these.

 

Bad times will test the strength of any relationship. It will make or break you. Anyone can be good company during the good times. But only those worthy of your affection will stick with you through the bad.

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Hi jxl. I commend you on your commitment to relationships. Call me old-fashioned but I completely agree with your stance. There is no doubt about it communication is the key. I read a great book once that suggested that the reason why so many marriages in our times are failing is because people are led by a misconception that the perfect marriage should be effortless until death. This is in fact not quite realistic - in my experience when things are easy, then you never really test your partners love and commitment to the relationship. You want to be with someone that wants to stick it out and work through issues no matter how messy they are at times (and they can and will come up). I guess we are all prisoners of our expectations. At the same time, having bumps along the way can really nurture the relationship as it has with mine.

I think you shouldn't jump the gun too much when meeting others but at the same time ask them about their values. I've found that this is the only commonality that needs to exist for two people to have a successful marriage.

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