tinydancer81 Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 I have been reading 'Why Men Love * * * * * es doormat to Dreamgirl' and my god....what a wake up call! It is by no means telling you act like a b***h but to hold your own in a relationship, and to be honest some of the advice given i kinda knew already but i was always unsure of whether it worked or not. But seriously read this and your confidence will rocket! Im not suggesting you go out there and treat men badly at all because that is just immature and stupid. Im suggesting you hold back a little, dont give up the whole candy shop in one go, make him work for it, leave something to the imagination and for gods sake live your life....dont wait around for him to call, go out and do something, see a friend, go to a movie, go shopping or paragliding but for gods sake do something. Since reading this book i have wanted to grab several girlfriends when they come to me with dating/relationship drama and say 'stop stressing!!!! why are YOU winding yourself up about this?' 'so he hasn't called in 2 days, leave it....if he's interested he'll call and you know what dont give him a hard time be happy that he called and go with the flow!' So this is my advice to you ladies, if you dont own this book get out there and buy it NOW!!!! and to all you guys, im not bashing you in anyway at all, in fact by us following this advice we make dating more fun for you and you get to date confident fun women!
D_Lish Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 I havn't read it....but it's all about not being a doormat I figure....which is basic common sense really.
dani_katze Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 tinydancer, thank you I just read some pages on amazon and it seems very interesting... and so true about so many mistakes I have done with men... Well, never is too late...
real_life_101 Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 I read though this book, what a bunch of crap. They tell you, if a guys says he wants a relationship he is only out for sex. What kind of crap is that. What you dont understand is these so called date doctors are making huge amounts of cash off of people. Trust me When you are with the right guy he will not walk all over you. However if is is doing something that is bothering you. you should let him know at that point not 2 days, 2weeks or 2 months down the road.
cruzer Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 I read though this book, what a bunch of crap. They tell you, if a guys says he wants a relationship he is only out for sex. What kind of crap is that. What you dont understand is these so called date doctors are making huge amounts of cash off of people. Trust me When you are with the right guy he will not walk all over you. However if is is doing something that is bothering you. you should let him know at that point not 2 days, 2weeks or 2 months down the road. This is very true. however this does not rule out that SOME guys might say they want a relationship, only to have sex. i really think that people in a relationship should be honest when something is bothering them. if u wait months then bring it up, and u end up breaking up over it, u just wasted months and more hurt with that person. if u wait weeks to tell them and they fix whatever it was almost instantly, u put up with it longer than u needed to.
tinydancer81 Posted February 3, 2009 Author Posted February 3, 2009 Yes it is all about common sense - thank you DLish - and its not a bunch of crap -as someone else pointed out - but you would b startled to realise how many women fail to realise half the advice given out in this book. When a woman is nuts about a guy she isn't thinking straight and i think if you read through the majority of the posts on this site you'll see that this book has some very good points. This book is just a helper thats all.
parlae Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 that's true about men too, though. a man who is a 'doormat' is not attractive at all. in my opinion..
Perfect Dark Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 that's true about men too, though. a man who is a 'doormat' is not attractive at all. in my opinion.. I agree. I'll have a look at this book and let you know my opinion. Dang that's 2 books to my list of reading haha!
purpleduckie Posted February 8, 2009 Posted February 8, 2009 this is my favorite "self-help" book. it's the only one i've read haaha... but i love it. whenever i feel down, i just read it... and it's an amazing pick me up. my attitude about guys are completely different. i know that it's "common sense", but common sense sometimes isn't so common. hah. the main theme in this book isn't about how you should treat men. it's about valuing yourself, having your own lives. and most girls just don't have that. it's sad but true.
laisla Posted February 8, 2009 Posted February 8, 2009 i think i knew that ever since i was a little girl...lol
liquer Posted February 8, 2009 Posted February 8, 2009 I hate the term self-help book, I mean, if you are reading a book for help, then it's not self-help is it? How many of them actually work? To me, they seem to want to trap you in this role of the victim.
purpleduckie Posted February 8, 2009 Posted February 8, 2009 i think i knew that ever since i was a little girl...lol lol well then you are just very smart seriously though... 99% of girls i know need to read this book and realize.. "OH i'm being an IDIOT!". even the ones who think they got it down pat. most of them let guys walk allll over them and don't even realize it.
laisla Posted February 8, 2009 Posted February 8, 2009 lol well then you are just very smart i attribute it to the good female role models in my life...for example my mother. not saying that she is a b-word...of course not...but she does know how to keep her husband happy! also i think being a b-word doesn't mean you are rude and disrespectful, you can still be a very nice person, i think it just means that you should know who you are and what you want.
purpleduckie Posted February 8, 2009 Posted February 8, 2009 i attribute it to the good female role models in my life...for example my mother. not saying that she is a b-word...of course not...but she does know how to keep her husband happy! also i think being a b-word doesn't mean you are rude and disrespectful, you can still be a very nice person, i think it just means that you should know who you are and what you want. ya, i have great female role models as well... it's just nice to be reminded of the power you have in your hand. life can wear you down, i guess!
purpleduckie Posted February 8, 2009 Posted February 8, 2009 I hate the term self-help book, I mean, if you are reading a book for help, then it's not self-help is it? How many of them actually work? To me, they seem to want to trap you in this role of the victim. contrary, actually. this book reminds you of how much power you truly have. it's empowering.
Radίaηce Posted February 15, 2009 Posted February 15, 2009 just bought it at B&N since you recommended it, i was curious. I haven't slept all night! lol...read it and finished it in 10 hours. Well, now that i have read it...I ALREADY KNEW THAT. I am guilty of some of the "nice girl" traits, and i really hate to refer myself as a "B" but i would translate the nice girl as insecure, and the B to have self confidence, high respect for herself AND others. The book is in no way saying be a nasty B to men because that's what they love. It is simply summing up the following: 1) Put yourself first (always) 2) Have your OWN life 3) Don't wait around (don't cancel plans) 4) Don't be his mama! 5) Praise him (so that he feels manly and needed) 6) And once again...HAVE YOUR OWN LIFE. This book can really work both ways. They could also call it "Why women love A holes" because honestly, would you really want some insecure man clinging on to you for dear life, dropping everything to please you, never has a mind of his own, etc. etc. etc? I think not. I would highly recommend this book to insecure and needy people. I'm not sure how easily those two traits can change, but everything starts with YOU and the way you treat yourself. IF you don't treat yourself like a queen or a king, well no body else will want to, and if they do...they'll lose interest the second you are TOO needy.
Radίaηce Posted February 15, 2009 Posted February 15, 2009 I'm still not really comfortable/agreeable with the term...but apparently a woman that knows what she wants and doesn't want is a "B."
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