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When you love someone do you fear losing them?


scared and alone

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i think this happens in a relationship that we dont feel is balanced...girls do it with insecurity and guys end up doing it by over supplication and sometimes insecurity as well. It really has to do with you dear and you need to work on improving yourself either outwardly or inwardly so that you know you are deserving of him.

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Sounds like you don't trust them.

 

How long have you been together? Has he done something in the past to take away that trust? If not him, did another person cheat on you or leave you for someone else?

 

 

if you have lost trust in a SO, do you think you can ever trust them again? if so, how? i've lost trust. he betrayed me by lying and jerking me around... can you ever just get past that once the trust is gone?

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An occasional thought that you would really miss him or her if they were suddenly gone is likely normal, but if you have a lot of doubts pestering you that he might leave you then either his actions cause you insecurity, or you are insecure by nature. I couldn't say which as I dont' know your relationship dynamic.

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if you have lost trust in a SO, do you think you can ever trust them again? if so, how? i've lost trust. he betrayed me by lying and jerking me around... can you ever just get past that once the trust is gone?

 

Well you just answered the question in my last post. If he betrayed you, then yes, your fears are not unfounded. The only way to get thru this, and even then it will be a hard road, is if he changes his actions and is truthful and honest with you. By lying and jerking you around, do you mean he cheated on you?

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It's normal, even I get that fear sometimes even though it's totally needless as not only does my boyfriend love me, he is not the type who cheats, he didn't even cheat on his ex when he had been wanting to break up with her for months. As long as you don't start trying to stop him from going out without you or start accusing him of cheating or wanting to cheat then it's ok. You're normal.

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You shouldn't, it's self fulfilling. But your life should be in such a way your happiness does not depend on keeping someone in your life that you don't trust to stay in it...

 

you're getting me wrong. I don't mean it like that. I DO trust him to stay in it, I just don't like the thought of ever losing him simply because I love him and I dont want to lose him. It has nothing to do with it will actually happen, its just because I don't want it to happen.

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No, haven't felt that way in a long time.

But that feeling of security took a while in the making. In the early stages of the relationship, it was a fear, that he would find someone else. Real early stages.

 

But there's been nothing but trust, faith and security built that I have no reason to think it.

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you're getting me wrong. I don't mean it like that. I DO trust him to stay in it, I just don't like the thought of ever losing him simply because I love him and I dont want to lose him. It has nothing to do with it will actually happen, its just because I don't want it to happen.

 

I think that's different.

 

Losing someone..to death..is a little different than your lover ditching you for someone else.

 

Anyone fears their partner's death. But there's a difference between your partner leaving you for someone else and them passing away. The fear of them leaving you is built on insecurity, the fear of them dying is a normal every day fear of life.

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I think that's different.

 

Losing someone..to death..is a little different than your lover ditching you for someone else.

 

Anyone fears their partner's death. But there's a difference between your partner leaving you for someone else and them passing away. The fear of them leaving you is built on insecurity, the fear of them dying is a normal every day fear of life.

 

oops.. I obviously read the initial message wrong..

 

I don't fear losing him to another person. He can trust me not to leave him for someone else - ergo - I can trust him for the same. I realise that doesnt logically follow but its perfectly logical to my heart

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