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Ex fiance wants to go on a vacation with me...


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Is this a good sign? I want her back so much and I'm doing everything in my power to accomplish that. We have been talking a lot more and getting along and spending time with one another. Then this morning she said we should take a vacation somewhere like Mexico or someplace nice with a beach. I was kind of surprised by this. She mentioned something about it possibly being good for us. I never really heard of anything like this, but is this a good sign? If she didn't want to reconcile, why would she suggest we go on vacation together to someplace like Mexico? Thoughts?

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without knowing much else to me it sounds like shes trying to get a free trip i think if u go through with it u decide on somewhere YOU want to go independent of her wants and let her know that she can come with you or you find a beach and tell her youll cover the plane tickets and she can cover the hotel or something so its simply not just a free ride.

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Bad idea. You should have complete and total reconciliation first before considering going on a trip with her. Right now you don't know how honourable her motive is for this trip...is it really to re-connect with you or is she looking for a free trip. Even if she were to pay her own way completely..airfare, hotel, meals, taxis etc, it is still possible she is asking you because she wants to go away and has nobody to go with. I would not entertain the notion of going away with her. I would tell her that you are not comfortable doing that at this point in time and that if you two are working your way to reconciliation you would rather wait on the trip and do it at a later date. If she walks away from you after that then you know that she was just in it for the free trip or having someone to go with. If she truly wants to reconcile it won't hinge on your decision not to go away with her.

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It is risky but it sounds like she is reaching out to you and probably wants to reconcile. You have to weigh the pros and cons and decide whether or not you think the vacation will help or hinder your chances of working things out. I think she is right in that it could bring you closer together because it could give you some space to spend quality time together away from everything. On the other hand, you can't be sure what her motives are. She may just want to go on a trip and may be fine with the idea of you being there...I have to say though, I would not go on a trip with an ex I was not interested in getting back together with just for a trip...to much potential for a lot of unwanted things...to me a free trip is not worth the stress. But that's just me.

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Well if this means anything, she mentioned last night that we should look into couples counseling. So that has to mean she is interested in getting back together and working on the relationship right? I also confronted her and asked her if she was just looking for a free trip and she said no, she thought of it as a way to possibly help our relationship and spend time together. Besides the trip though, I think the fact that she mentioned counseling is a huge step in the right direction!

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Going on an exotic vacation is a cliché regarding repairing a relationship in trouble. It is the fantasy. Yes, you will have long walks on the beach, romantic dinners, great sex and all this lovey dovey stuff...but what happens when you get back home...the problems which split you apart will still be there and still need to be worked on. A romantic get-a-way does not fix what is broken, it just sweeps it under the rug. The true issues need to be fixed first...counseling is a good first step but why not commit to counseling first before actually going away on a trip. It is one thing to TALK about going to counseling, but quite another matter to follow through with counseling, continue going and work hard at fixing the problems. Why not postpone the romantic vacation until you are both in a better place regarding the relationship...in other words, wait and see if there is actually long-term follow-through with re-building the relationshp and working through the problems. If you can then re-connect on a deeper level after sorting through the problems, imagine how much more romantic and loving this deferred vacation will end up being. It will end up being the reward for a job well done rather than simply a fantasy and escape from reality.

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I suggest you two put the trip on hold, just for the time being, research counseling options, start counseling and then go on the trip sometime down the line. I think for now, you should take her at her word, but also ask her for concrete action and you yourself also should meet her halfway with concrete action.

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All words so far, tell her you are open to and enthusiastic about counselling and see how it plays out. Look for actions going forward, don't be totally passive, but also don't hop right into the driver's seat. Once you two agree on a counselor and actually go to some sessions, it's square one, until then, it's just talk, and you don't really know her motives.

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Learn English Via Listening | Begin...
Learn English Via Listening | Beginner Level | Lesson 11| Summer Vacation

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