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sexually frustrated!


zeegrrL

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Hi everyone. So here's my situation. I have a pretty high sex drive and I am always in the mood, while my boyfriend is content in having sex 0-1 times a day. In the beginning it was great...he wanted it as much as I did.. but of course that slowly died. We're only in our 8th month and I feel like we're a married couple slipping into a sexless life. And what's worse is he is content with doing it one time which lasts 5-10 minutes. He turned into a one-minute man just a few months ago but he improved after I finally talked to him about it. He is NEVER up for a second round unless I ask for it, or if he's in the mood (hardly happens) or if he's in the mood to make me cum. I can't orgasm when having normal sex. He has to try extra hard.. which makes me feel bad. I get the impression that it's a chore for him. I try to hint to him about how foreplay would help.. but he's never into it. Which may have been my fault because when he did try in the beginning, I shyed away from it.

 

I have talked to him about not being able to orgasm or how he's never in the mood when I am.. and granted, his performance does improve but after a few days, he'll forget about it. I'm 24 and he's a year younger. I don't have much sexual experience or knowledge.. and I always wondered (if you guys can answer this for me) what is the average length that couples have sex? I would hear from my girlfriends or others that sex would last all night/for hours. How often and how true is this ? And how often should couples have sex?

 

Sometimes I question whether my bf is being selfish or maybe that I am not communicating my needs properly. I need advice on how I can bring this up to him. I have to say though that my bf is great person. He is a true gentlemen, always considerate and caring. He's very affectionate and ALWAYS caters to me.. EXCEPT in bed!! lol.

 

I appreciate any advice ..especially on how I can properly approach the problem to him and what I should say. Thanx~

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To much sex to soon. You guys are burning out or at least he is. I know me and most of my buddies can only have sex a couple of times a week, not that we cant have it more then that haha. I know that the less I have it, the more I am going to want it, thus keeping me attracted to my girlfriend. More less I get bored because we have done everything there is to be done in such a short period of time. Enjoy doing other things together and limit sex to a couple times a week, and watch your relationship grow. Just make sure when you have sex once or twice a week that it is quality. Remember quality is always better then quanity. Dont feel bad that he has to please you he probably enjoys it. Slowwww it down a bit, get to know each other on an emotional level to match your physical level.

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To much sex to soon. You guys are burning out or at least he is...I know that the less I have it, the more I am going to want it, thus keeping me attracted to my girlfriend. More less I get bored because we have done everything there is to be done in such a short period of time...

 

Totally disagree...the more I have sex with my gf (ex now), the more I wanted it...after a year, it seemed to start to fade, but if we did it two or three nights in a row, i was practically begging for it. If we went a week without, I basically forgot to try for it after that long.

 

I think she used sex as a weapon...i.e, if she wanted something, she would withold it to get what she wanted...i don't recommend that, it just makes the other person resent you.

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Recent study I read said the average couple has sex 2-3 times per week, and the average duration is about 15 minutes of penetrative intercourse.

 

The frequency linearly decreases with age (for men at least), down to slightly under 1.5 times per week in their 50s (study I read didn't go higher than 50s). It didn't say how the duration changed with age.

 

FYI, my wife and I have basically always had sex 2-3 times a week too, unchanged for pretty much the 9 years we've been having sex. During is about 15-20 mins of penetration, although sometimes she wants quickies which is significantly less. It's reasonable to say duration was less when I was younger.

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Totally disagree...the more I have sex with my gf (ex now), the more I wanted it...after a year, it seemed to start to fade, but if we did it two or three nights in a row, i was practically begging for it. If we went a week without, I basically forgot to try for it after that long.

 

I think she used sex as a weapon...i.e, if she wanted something, she would withold it to get what she wanted...i don't recommend that, it just makes the other person resent you.

 

 

That's because she got bored with you sexually.

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That's because she got bored with you sexually.

 

she would be the first...besides, whenever we did get intimate again, it was usually initiated by her, so obviously she wasn't "bored"....but thanks for sharing your wisdom. i'm sure in 52 years your knowledge of sex far outweighs anything i could possibly know...tool

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