Jump to content

Compounding Debt & Hitting Rock Bottom, Advice?


brokenshoes

Recommended Posts

This will come off as a, odd, question but, well I'm looking for advice on what I can do and whether this is the right/logical thing to do in my situation. I'll explain this from the beginning and for the whole.

 

I'm a first-year student in university. I'm looking at another 4 years in school going my undergrad, and probably another 2 on top of that doing my Master's, because well, an undergrad doesn't get you anywhere these days anymore, especially in science. I, at the moment, have $18 000 of debt through a student loan, and it's on the lowest interest rate possible with my bank. I owe another thousand on my credit card, and have about $5200 through gov't financial aid through my province (I'm Canadian).

 

I go to school out of province, in Québec. I have a trust fund from my parents that will cover my tuition for the first two years of school (if all works out, I'm be in school for 5 years doing my undergrad and finish with either a B.Sc in Neuroscience or a B.Eng in Chemical Engineering). After that, I'm on my own for tuition. My books are covered by a trust find my grandparents set up for all 4 years.

 

The problem comes with money to live on. My line of credit stops at $20 000. My parents won't put it any higher (they co-signed it with me). So that leaves me with $2000 to live on for the rest of my university career. Obviously, I need a part-time job. I have no issues with that, I've been working since I was 14. The problem comes with making enough to live on. And the fact that I can't get a job here, they all want fully bilingual people. I speak a moderate amount of French, but it's not the same. I have no money to take courses. So basically, my job choices are deal drugs or escorting (bartender also has the ability to bring in $200+ a night but you have to be pretty and work in fast-paced clubs to do that, which are hard to get into). Because I don't have any friends here, just moved in August and live off campus, escorting seems the more likely of the two, and I avert the chance of getting arrested and charged, although the city I live in is pretty lax when it comes to soft-core drug laws.

 

I can easily make $500+ a week doing escorting, it solves my money issues and I wouldn't have to work much so it wouldn't interfere with me doing my school work (6 courses a semester). I have no hardcore drug habits, I don't drink excessively but at the rate I'm going, I'll starve before I finish school (no parents can't help, they could barely afford to feed my the 4 of us plus my brother's exchange student last year) and still end in $50 000+ debt if I finish school.

 

To me this makes entire logical sense, escorting. It's a victimless crime in my sense, I have no significant other, no friends that could find out. My parents and family live 9 hours away in a different province and I live here in the summer as well. My friends and family don't come visit because, well it's 9 hours away to drive (well drive like my parents do) and because all of Canada hates Québec and never really want to visit. I have a roommate, but I keep weird hours anyways so he wouldn't notice anyways. And yet, a part of me can't convince myself to do it?

 

Seems better to ask for advice on this, although I think I've exhausted any other ideas. Thoughts, oh, incase it wasn't clear from anything above, I am female. Sorry for the long-winded explanation but it makes more sense to explain where this is all coming from than just throwing it out there.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Not necessarily. It's based more on what the client is asking for, escorts deal more in the GFE area than the straight, 'pick a girl from a line-up and go into a room' area.

 

Explain that then. Unless told how are they supposed to know unless they a) do a background check or b) are told. In a city of 3.3 million, it's not likely I'll be found out. Especially since I intend to move to Germany after school.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

First of all, I don't understand how you managed to stack a loan of $18,000 already because this is your first year.

 

People can take out ~$4000-$4500 per semester if they're living by themselves. 3 semester means $12,000. A place to live is approx $400-$500 per month. That's $4800-$6000 per year. Using the amount your parents gave you, you have more than enough. Just take out maximal amount possible for now and repay it back after you're out of school. That's what student loan is for.

 

Perhaps I'm in a completely different world and couldn't comprehend your standpoint, but I don't understand your extreme talk about drug dealing and escorting.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi...sounds like youre i a spot. Have you considered an internet business? Use your brain...so you wont have to use your body..You sound pretty intelligent to me..

I wont judge you but I think you can do a healthier job...Get your brain ticking...what do you like?What can you do?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm not asking for you're judgments on me or my lifestyle, I'm asking your view on what else could be done in my situation. I'm currently living on less than $20 a day, so keep your tone down. I'm well aware of how a loan works and what my costs are. Can you not read?! What exactly isn't clear? I already have $18 000 debt that are immediate problems, so I have $2000 to live on for 4 years... how am I not clear about stating that. I'm not talking anything extreme, are you blind or can you not read? I referenced the drugs because 99% of working girls do it because they are addicted to drugs, or are being forced into it by a SO. I was simply scratching that off the board by saying that's not why I'm doing it.

 

Lots of girls make it that way. Pretty common in today's world of ridiculous expenses. If these older folk have a problem with it maybe they should pay attention to some of the problems pushing women into the industry. Such as ; ridiculous tuition (it is a joke here too) and very high costs of living. Eight years ago I could rent a room in a house for $60.. student wages since then have arguably gone down with the introduction of work choices abolishing penalty rates for many workers combined with other negative economic factors pushing down the demand for workers in areas students can work.

 

Particularly hard for males because we cannot work in a lot of the retail/hospitality jobs that tend to employ students. But that is a different rant, typically they will work in full time jobs and save for a couple of years. Just letting you know working full time and going to college a few years latter is a viable option. I mean some people might hold it against you that you are older, but you can save a lot of personal distress and debt to the extent it might actually be worth it. Depends on your capabilities too. If you are sure you can reach the top - stick with it - if you are like me and know it is never likely to happen that way. A few years or 5 working won't hurt you all that much in the long run. I mean is there any real reason you can't become a waitress or a coffee maker or bartender or something ? I hear in the USA and Canada they can make absurd amounts of money because of the tipping system. Not bad for a job that is University friendly and offers the hours you want.

 

My advice. Go for the bartender thing, you never know. Point is if you would make a good escort you would also have what it takes to probably be a good bartender. If not, you can still work as an escort. I advise that you try and do both because you will want work experience on your resume.

 

Is prostitution legal in Canada ? If not try to work somewhere that it is because under the legal system you will make a lot of money. Countries where it is illegal you tend to get raped, beaten and murdered. Unless you feel you can escort safely you are probably better off just getting a normal job to save up for college. I am sorry to say. The other thing about prostitution is that it could age you pretty badly and prostitutes tend to get bad breath and teeth after a while. If you feel you need to go down that path all the more power to you. But I'd try to find a different way to get through unless that is what you really want to do.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The other thing you need to look at is that a degree is just a piece of paper, at the end of the day it is not make or break of your entire world. You seem to be putting yourself through a lot and into a situation you would not normally find yourself. I also question your level of maturity. Who would spend $9000 to travel when there were more pressing expenses ? Again, not to judge you as that is not my intention. But rather to point out that it may be better for you to make this huge investment in your life, and future at a time when you are a more mature person. You've suggesting escorting very early on which suggests that is probably what you wanted to do anyway, however I think this whole situation reeks of 'unnecessary' and is a person who seems intent to sort of write herself into her own tragedy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think if you do this, you'll just be digging your hole deeper hon. It'll get worse - not better.

 

The right-in-your-face problem at the mo' is not having enough cash, but that's not why you are in this situation and more cash won't solve it if you don't look into how you got here in the first place.

 

Honestly, I agree with Cap in that it seems like you are intent on writing your own tragedy. And getting into the escort business would really be a tragedy, IMO.

 

You have so much. Family backing you, trust fund was all set up. A good brain and a good healthy body.

 

And ok - well I had to laugh at your comment about Quebec. lol. That was just funny. I personally LOVE love Quebec - and find it to be a pretty cheap place to live actually. Especially if you are living on the Quebec side and not the Ottawa/Ontario side to go to uni.

 

There is the option of busting your butt off in the bars doing barkeeping, serving and picking up tips. Maybe even cutting down your course load to take on more work - hey, people do what they have to do. You can't keep this up being in spots like this for long.

 

Or you could always transfer Uni and go back home. Probably you don't like that, but you DO have that option.

 

If you ask me, both of these options are better than having to live on the sly and starting off doing something that gives you a bad feeling in your gut.

 

good luck.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Personally, I wouldn't find it acceptable to sell my body for an education. There are other ways to educate myself, like studying on my own and taking certification tests to prove my knowledge to future employers. Sometimes they even prefer people without a degree because they don't have to pay them as much.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't think it is helpful to the OP to be discussing our personal views on the morality of prostitution. She has obviously made up her mind. Secondly it would not make her situation worse, her situation would improve due to an increased cash flow. What is important is that she make the right decision given her situation. My opinion is that prostitution is valid decision if the person wants to do the job and has a sound mind when making that decision. I merely question the OP because a lot of the story makes me thing she is very young and has not looked at other prospects first. I think it is very easy to tell a person to simply get a job but most of us are not trying to support ourselves and get through college right now. Even here in good old Australia - things are a LOT more expensive than they used to by while the typical wage has not budged.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It's hard to have a neutral talk on prostitution. It's one of those subjects people get really impassioned about.

 

Personally, I don't think it would be the best way to make money. You could probably make a lot of money that way, but at what cost (sounds like I got that from an after school special).

 

How would you explain to your parents your second line of income? They will probably notice that you are working, are you comfortable lying to them?

 

Maybe check out some sites on prostitution and escorts.

 

Have you tried looking for a job on-campus? When I went to University I worked at the Call Centre, and they had such a high turn-over rate I would be surprised if they turned anyone away.

 

Have you considered switching schools? Not to hate on Quebec, but I have known a few people who have gone to Quebec and they had the same struggle with finding a job because of language barriers. Switching to another area might make it easier to find work.

 

Here is a link to an Escorts Blog, link removed

Link to comment
Share on other sites

to another poster... I don't know too many places where you can live for 400 - 500 per month!

 

in many places in Canada, you would be paying more than that to share , before you think about utlities or eating.

 

Certainly not here. I know many people who have to work multiple jobs just to barely stay afloat.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think were I in your position, I'd cut back on course load and work more. What you are trying to accomplish is impressive, and yes, it will take a while to get there, but I think you're better off reaching your goal a little later if it means you're safe and don't run the risk of having to check off that box on your job app that says "have you ever been arrested?" (soft laws or not, I don't think it's ever good to assume that means your odds of getting caught are in your favor)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Risk vs Rewards.

 

Is it worth it?

Well if you going through that path, I can share with you a real story.

This one girl from my college was very infamous because she was a porn star. I happen to live with her best friend and she told me that she resorted to porn business because she was dead broke and couldn't pay for school. had to get surgery that she coudln't pay for. BTW porn industry is a recession proof business so if you can maximize your potentials more power to you and you can be as successful of a business women as tara patrick who also got a bachelor degree in science (biochemistry). Think about the pyramid. tara is at the top of the pyramid but the rest are on the bottom suffering...

 

So going back to the girl from school, she ended up flunking out of school and getting fired at where she used to work because she wasnt performing right and started doing coke and heroine. a sad ending.

 

but you should use escorting as a last resort. because you will be opening up a pandora's box if you enter it.

 

Successful people surrounds themselves with successful people and clearly college is a great place to meet influencial people who will shape your future. what kind of people will you be associating yourself with if you escort? Unless you can buy into the "pretty woman" syndrome and can strike up with a rich hedgefund manager. great for you

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sorry for the dum answer.answer that don't really help. stuff tha you already knew about risks and rewards.

 

1) don't dig even deeper. You might think right now you are in deep sheit. but if you don't stop now it will be deeper and it would be harder to recover later.

2) If you have a boyfriend, temporarily make him pay for stuff and live with him.

3) Look for the short and long term goal. you can escort as long as you have a sound long term goal. a means to an end.

4) don't do drugs with obvious consequences.

5) join the army or other organization like peace corps that helps you rid of your debts.

6) There are other ways to sell your body to science besides your eggs. clinicaltrials.gov

7) i say wait tables, and bartend

8) use the internet to your advantage.

9) you have loving parents, find ways to make them agree with you and don't burn bridge with your parents. parents will bail you out. they jsut showing tough love.

10) you can rob a bank just kidding

Link to comment
Share on other sites

She would be selling herself for money.. How could it not make things worse? Yes she may be having more money coming in but her self worth would go right out the window.

 

All I am saying is that for some people prostitution is a perfectly valid choice. Selling yourself is subjective terminology. You are having sex with someone for money. You either think that is a big deal or you do not. A matter of opinion and neither has the right to enforce on the other.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Selling yourself isn't subjective terminology. When you have sex for money you ARE selling yourself for money/drugs or alcohol whether you enjoy it or not.

 

On what bounds are you defining selling yourself, what part of yourself ? Plumbers sell themselves. Or do waitresses and women who are hired for their looks sell themselves too ? The trade is sex for money whether that acceptable or not is up to the people involved. There is nothing wrong with selling sex to finance an education or to improve your financial future. Women do it all the time only in a more covert way. In my opinion, $18,000 in debt is good reason enough.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On what bounds are you defining selling yourself, what part of yourself ? Plumbers sell themselves. Or do waitresses and women who are hired for their looks sell themselves too ? The trade is sex for money whether that acceptable or not is up to the people involved. There is nothing wrong with selling sex to finance an education or to improve your financial future. Women do it all the time only in a more covert way. In my opinion, $18,000 in debt is good reason enough.

 

 

 

Plumbers and waitresses don't have sex or sucking off some random guy and lose their self respect in the process while doing their 'job'.

 

My self respect is far more important to me than debt. I can eventually pay the debt off, I can't ever get my self respect back.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...