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Why why why am I still thinking about it??

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Seriously.... my ex hurt me, I didn't say xmas to him, didn't say happy birthday to him, didn't say new year to him..... cut all strings, nothing null....


why am I still thinking about him and the stuff that happened and the past!!!


WHY WHY WHY, i am tired of thinking about it and having my emotions stirred up.... it's been almost 4 weeks of no contact and broken up for about 6 months now!!!


Is it because I am unhappy in my own life, unstable living situation and job and friends? that is why I am still thinking of him? cos he was my happiness for some time?




Tell me what is it that I am not doing... nc, moving on, doing my own things....

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Takes time.


4 months broken up and 2 months of NC. Still think about her everyday. I've done everything possible, I mean humanly possible without substance abuse or anything self destructive.


Just gotta work through it and accept that your ex will stick with you for awhile. You've experienced a loss, an important one. Of course it's going to take time and effort. You can't just expect it to wash away so quickly. My loss is monumental, it still hurts, but I'm not beating myself over it. I'm only human and so are you.

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I really dont know either why people still think about their ex. I think for me as being hurt by my ex that the pain is really what i want to get away from. It still sometimes takes all my energy away to where im depressed the whole day. It basically stops me from having anything that you would consider a normal life. I hope to find a reason to be able to keep on going but for the most part i come up blank. I guess i can only see the other alternative and thats either be miserable forever or keep trying to tell myself that they will come back and things will be different. Its just i know that its either not a good idea, not realistic, or just not how i want to live my life.


I wish i had more to say even for myself but all i can do is just hope that its like what people say it is and that it does get better. Ive also tried to learn to be ok with things not being ok and not being able to really do anything that can change it. Its kinda like a no win situation where im gonna be alone and be this way or that i could go back to why i was miserable in the first place. Its just not being with the person at least gives me a chance to make things better where me goin backwards in life would just have made everything worse than it was before because nothing was gonna get better.

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Sounds so cliche but it's true, time heals all wounds. Look at it as a new opportunity to expand your horizons. Explore new places, read inspiring books, watch a great movie, get outside and breathe fresh air (if it's available). Do the things you didn't have time to do when you were in the relationship. It's difficult when you were the one getting hurt, obviously you had a different outlook than your partner. Knowing that you should feel a sense of relief that you found out now rather than a few more years down the road.

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I think you answered your own question already.


When your life is full of inconsistency & trouble with work, school, family, friends, it helps to turn to something stable.


I believe, especially in your case, you depended on him to feel grounded & stable. Now that he's not around, you've lost yourself.


There's not really much you can do to fight the feelings, but you can help yourself cope with the break-up & accept the fact that someone else will come along eventually. He obviously wasn't the one.


Have you even tried to move on? After I broke up with my ex, if took a few months before I was able to get over the whole thing. It helped a lot to alter myself. I changed my hair, went shopping often, took care of my body, pampered myself...made it about me. That's what I recommend you try doing. It really boosts up your confidence & makes you realize that life goes on & you're what's important.

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