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atmosphere88
Starting Over In a Relationship - B...
Starting Over In a Relationship - Beginners Guide

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Hi...heres my story..

 

My gf and i were in a long distance relationship for 4 months and it all ended yesterday...We normally see each other once a week as we live 120miles apart and we both go to different universities..Over Xmas holidays we seen each other abit more, and we would spend like 3 days together at a time...

 

I went down to her last sunday and she ended up asking could we talk..She expressed how she loves being with me but is having doubts about us...She feels so crap during the week when were apart and her mood changes so much then..i told her how i felt the same during the week sometimes but that we can work on that..She said she doesnt get as excited as she did at the start of the relationship when we are due to meet up, but i said this happens in all relationships,u get used to the person...I asked does she still love me and she basically said that shes gotten so used to telling me that she does love me that shes not sure about the word...She said she loves spending time with me and wudnt change it for the world...

 

We (she) decided to take a break then and she was in tears when i left for home on monday..I mean even after that talk we were all lovey-dovey with each other, like everythin was as normal..she called me tuesday and said she didnt know where her head was at-college pressure,difficulties when were apart etc..She rang me the next day and called it all off,but when id ask her is she sure she wasnt 100% and she was so confused...She said she wudnt hav been able to break up face-face and i said maybe u dont want to break up etc..she said if i was there shed wanna be with me,so i replied by saying then maybe we shud not break up?!

 

I still love her so much,wev never had a fight or anythin and it just feels like shes confused and has rushed into this, like the break only lasted 3 days..she has alotta college pressures this week in particular and i think thats takin a toll....?!It doesnt feel right at all..

 

I think she'll be thinking alot about it all and maybe time away from me is what she needs for a while to clear her head and work out what she really wants...?

 

What do you guys think?Any advice?

Thanks...

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There are two types of LDR.

 

The ones that are tough as hell and end up failing...

 

And the ones that are tough as hell and succeed.

 

Perhaps it was a good idea. If she couldn't last 4 months on seeing each other once every week then it's a good thing she ended it now... I think you'll get over it a little faster than you might think.

 

I go 4 months without even seeing my girlfriend..

 

If you really love her then I'd say go try and get her back, but an early break up is usually a sign that it may not work in the future.

 

Good luck If you both work on it... you can do it

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Some people just can't do distance and need physical closeness constantly..

I myself am thinking of calling off a relationship and because of the distance and the fact I aint seeing him that often. It's not that I don't love him....I just think it aint gonna work and because of the distance between us. I feel that the 'physical' closeness, is an important aspect of a relationship and a relationship cannot thrive without it. If you don't have that regularly, then you end up drifting apart eventually....and I'd rather end it before that happens.

I also have a fear that he's gonna meet someone closer to home if I was to be honest....and I'd rather get out, than have him just disappear on me/or have to hear the words 'I've met someone else'...would be too painful.

 

Maybe shes also thinking along the same lines I am...??

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