I think I'm in love...and I feel MISERABLE

[Traveler27]

I think I love the man I've been seeing recently, and it's making me feel so ill. I guess I should mention that it's a long-distance relationship, so perhaps I should post this there, but I just wanted to know if other people feel like they are coming apart when they've been in love.

 

I spent 5 1/2 years with someone who I didn't feel this strongly about, so to finally have this overwhelming feeling is quite foreign to me. I think I have all the tell-tale signs of lovesickness. I can't stop thinking about him (and us together), every minute is occupied with thoughts of him, I feel lethargic and tired, low appetite and overall very melancholic.

 

I can't believe I've lost control of my emotions like this. I don't like this feeling and I'm not even sure if this guy loves me back. Have no idea what will happen with this relationship since we are separated by such a huge distance. What have others felt like in the early stages of being in love?

[jettison]

The fact that you're not sure of his love is heavily adding to your lovesick feeling. And even if he were to tell you, you may not be apt to believe him, and you're likely to stay sick.

 

And oh yes, I know the feeling so well. I fell for my new girlfriend, hard, hard, hard, and I remember telling her on many occasions, "I am sick with you. I've got the sickness so bad." And I remember her saying, "God, I've got the flu, and I'm just so ill. You need to make it feel better."

 

Ok, I'm suddenly missing that girlfriend again.

[AuthenticAuthor]

Well Traveler27, that pretty much sum up what I've been feeling too for a long while. To make things worse, I've been searching for a job for 8 months now with no luck; it seems as if many employers I meet think I'm "overqualified". I may be a little schizoid, but it sucks to be treated like an outsider...AGAIN.

 

I don't know what else to say other than I hope you focus your thoughts elsewhere and not be afraid to rethink your priorities. For me I try to remind myself that there are things much greater and more important than her alone, that which are eternal and closer to my heart. If she shares my dreams, my path, I'll rejoice. If not, then I'll wish her peace.

[Traveler27]

Well Traveler27, that pretty much sum up what I've been feeling too for a long while. To make things worse, I've been searching for a job for 8 months now with no luck; it seems as if many employers I meet think I'm "overqualified". I may be a little schizoid, but it sucks to be treated like an outsider...AGAIN.

 

I don't know what else to say other than I hope you focus your thoughts elsewhere and not be afraid to rethink your priorities. For me I try to remind myself that there are things much greater and more important than her alone, that which are eternal and closer to my heart. If she shares my dreams, my path, I'll rejoice. If not, then I'll wish her peace.

 

Thanks for your response AunthenticAuthor. Would you believe that I am out of work as well, and have also had virtually no luck with my job search. I think being out of work and not having a schedule makes thinking about them even easier, since there is nothing else to distract the mind from these feelings.

 

I wish I had a job so my mind could at least be preoccupied during the day. Sitting around at home is just intensifying these feelings of longing for him. Hope everything works out for you and good luck in your job search.

[AuthenticAuthor]

Thanks traveler27

 

I've been self-educating myself on economics for a long time now, and I just got done discussing with my mother the importance of savings. People don't just store stuff because they don't ever want to use it; they store it (or invest it) so that the future may be made easier for them or someone else. Save a little, and you may be able to afford a car eventually instead of relying on a bike, or afford that emergency surgery, etc. Without savings, the economy would deteriorate because the future is not considered. In fact, it would retrograde in so many ways...forever...ironically.

 

Right now with the economy and all, it's important for me and certainly for you to save...to forgo the opportunities of the moment for the sake of building the future. I'm spending more time learning than job-searching these days, and less time thinking about her, because of this and I plan to eventually start a home-based business once I figure out some market niche I can fill. If you can save yourself more time thinking of him and invest it on other constructive things, it would definitely help. I'm not suggesting that you eliminate your feelings for your SO; just tone them down a little so that the next time you meet circumstances would be much easier for the both of you because of your wise investment of kung-fu, "Time and Energy".

[guitars]

Oh yeah, that's a real familiar story to me. When I fell for the (so-far) big love of my life, I spent weeks in agony, just feeling really really sick. It's a strange phenomenon. My friends were asking me if I needed to see a doctor!