Basic: What should i do

[TenYearsGone]

So i've been faced with a problem. A while ago this girl and i had a thing for one another. It didnt work out really and we became friends. But it didnt stop there and we pretty much became best friends over a two year period. Now both of us are coming out of failed attempts at a relationship with some other people and i've come to a sort of realization that shes the one for me. And ive been picking up many things that make it seem like she feels the same way about me. Of course im not sure but along with this it seems like every time she does something that points towards her having feelings for me, something of the opposite will come up. Im gonna be leaving at the end of the year and i want to be with her but im afraid if she doesnt have feelings for me then things will get awkward between us and we'll both involuntarily drift away. Which of course i dont want to happen.

[Cognitive_Canine]

You both got out of relationships, that's probably why she is giving you mixed signals.

 

You are both in the proccess of healing and you are leaving soon. Why get into something and ruin a friendship?

[waltwhit]

Well, what caused things to not work out in the first place? What makes you think those things will not re-surface if you get back together? If you are leaving in a year, why do you want to start a relationship? Wouldn't it be better to just remain good friends while you are away and if/when you ever come back you could give it another try?

 

I think, though, if this is really bothering you and you REALLY want to start a relationship that will turn into LD, then you simply need to sit down and talk with her. Tell her you have had a lot on your mind, and you want to tell her what's been going on in your head. See if she feels the same way. You will either find out that she does, in which case you two can discuss the pros and cons of starting a relationship when you are going to be leaving or you will find out that she doesn't feel the same way. Though this may hurt, at least you will know and hopefully you two can remain friends. If your friendship is strong enough, it shouldn't be a problem. Although, many times when you tell someone that you are into them when you are in a friendship relationship, and they are not into you in that way, it puts things on an un-even keel. So, in that vain, perhaps it would just be best to play things out and see how they go for the next year, and at the end of that year, you may have your answer.

[ghost69]

it's a chance you take. you win some and you lose some. you put yourself out there and if the other person declines, you can lose a friendship. is it worth the risk?