orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 ......................................... Link to comment
Kalika Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 I guess it's only bad if you can't handle being rejected after opening up like that. Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 I'm already rejected. For me its just about him knowing. Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 oh well................. Link to comment
centrino345 Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 oranget There's nothing wrong with what u typed there. But do realize what u wrote down is sexual in nature, so if he does decide to come back there will be a chancethat he'll just be using you for sex. Question u should ask urself is if ure ok with that. That's just my two cents didnt mean to offend in any way Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 I know what you are saying, but i guess you would have called us lovers in the true sense of the word, more than a serious relationship. I would call him my ex lover. Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 By reading that, it sounds like you only have physical attraction towards him. You need more than that to sustain a relationship, and I hope you're not willing to settle for that. Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 at the moment, what i said is what im feeling, and i hope im not being judged for it not being a full on relationship. Link to comment
browneyedgirl36 Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 No one's judging you for not being in a full-on relationship; I guess what people are commenting on is that what you said you missed was the sexual part -- you didn't mention any actual feelings -- so it seems that you're telling him you miss him only in a sexual way. If this is true, and you're only interested in a sexual relationship with him, then maybe when he sorts his life out he'll want that again. But...if you're looking for more than that, focusing only on the physical in your e-mail to him sends the message that you're OK with just sex. Are you? If I remember your previous thread on this, you really aren't -- or at least you weren't when you wrote your other thread. If you're OK with it, then the e-mail you sent conveys that message. If you're not..welll..you'll have to think about what it is you want and whether or not you can -- should -- keep in contact with him if he doesn't want that. Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 Well we both said that we werent wanting casual anymore. I said I wanted a relationship and he said that he cant have anything right now. He knows of my feelings for him, and because he knows of my feelings, he knows that what I say here extends beyond sexual, but sexual is all we explored, and thats why its all I'm referring to. Its a bit hard to explain and i guess it doesnt make sense. Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 i feel so desperate to see him Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 oh god someone help me Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 at this point im happy for anyone to say anything Link to comment
waveseer Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 Being here on ena really helped me get over my ex. The previous two and a half years without ena didn't do it, but 10-12 weeks with ena did. If I could heal, anyone can. Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 i feel like i am never going to heal he is a man of few words when it comes to email, and no matter what he thinks of what i wrote, he is unlikely to respond Link to comment
waveseer Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 Then that's all the answer you need. Let go of that last shred of hope you're hanging onto and let yourself begin living again. Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 i dont even know where to start with healing I know he wont even read it tomorrow morning, and when he doesnt respond i am going to feel worse, even though he's not the best responder anyway Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 Then that's all the answer you need. Let go of that last shred of hope you're hanging onto and let yourself begin living again. what i mean is, him not responding is like him anyway. I still wont know how he feels. Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 and stupid me told him im not checking my email for a while, so he wont respnd anyway Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 its unbearable Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 maybe people think its insignificant because it wasnt a relationship, all i know is maybe its better if i never get involved with anyone again, maybe this should be my last hurt, because i cant stand going through this. Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 help.................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................. Link to comment
Adge Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 orange. You are not alone. I am going through hell at the moment too. I have sent an email to my ex and she hasn't responded. It feels like my heart is being ripped out again! I have no clue how she feels at the moment and it really hurts. You have to try and be strong. You want something to happen right away. Unfortunately it won't so just try and be patient. He may still yet reply!! Link to comment
browneyedgirl36 Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 orangetemple, I know the feeling of being almost desperate to see or talk to the person, but you have to get some perspective here. I read the conversation you posted between you and him awhile back (I think you deleted it, though, because I can't find it now), but you asked him several times if you could come see him, and he repeatedly said no, and whatever his reasons (his kids, having screwed-up stuff going on in his life right now, etc.) he has specifically told you he can't/won't/doesn't want to be in a relationship with you right now. He also said he was getting rid of his phone (which, to me, is a bit questionable, but anyway...) and that you could talk every once in awhile (or something to that effect) via e-mail, which indicates to me that he really was serious about not continuing things with you right now. I know it's painful, and I know the need to want to DO something, ANYTHING to change or fix it, but the fact is, you can't. You have to try to accept it. Part of that is sitting down with yourself and asking yourself why this relationship/FWB was so important to you that you don't feel you can let go. Don't you deserve something more and better? If you think you don't, why not? If you think you DO, then you have to realize that this situation, at least at this point, wasn't good for you. I haven't been in the same situation, but I have been in situations where I had a LOT of trouble letting go of someone who really wasn't all that good for me, and in every one of those cases, my difficulty in letting go had a lot more to do with ME than it did with the guy. It wasn't that the guy was so special and so amazing that I had to hang on -- I was hanging on out of fear, or neediness, or loneliness, or poor self-esteem, etc. Really, seriously, sit down and ask yourself what you are afraid will happen if you give up on this guy -- if you just let go of him and try to move forward. It's really important that you find things to do to keep you busy right now. Obviously, keeping busy isn't going to cure this, but it will cause you to have to focus on other things -- anything, even cleaning, vacuuming, doing laundry -- to keep you from sitting and dwelling on him and to keep you from continuing to e-mail him. Link to comment
orangetemple Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 everything you say is correct. I dont know why it is that i cant or wont let go. what will happen? maybe that i wont find anyone else? Maybe that might be a small fear? i wont email or contact him again Link to comment
.thumb.jpg.78735a344a3340a866dda54f465baebb.jpg)
.thumb.jpg.707652b1f845175b2f35e03ba7f1673e.jpg)
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.