staircase Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 I feel so violated. My ex somehow found my enotalone account and has read all the posts I had on here, about him! He said it was a challenge once I mentioned to him that I had been writing in a forum when he asked what I was up to. I should never have said anything. I had kept it to myself for a whole year. I didn't even mention that it was a forum for relationships, or that I had been writing about him. Now I am furious, and feel like he has taken away the one place I felt I could come to. I now have to watch what I say on here, who knows if he's going to read this too? It's not the first time that he's done this sort of thing. I thought I had learnt my lessons, and I was so careful to make sure that I didn't make myself identifiable...how could he possibly find me just from me mentioning that I was on a forum? It's ridiculous. Sigh. I don't know what to do now...this is devastating. Link to comment
george237 Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 I wonder why he would search around online to find your forum, kind of childish. Any who, change your name to something he doesn't know and don't mention his names on your future threads. Link to comment
JadedStar Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 I am sure if he lives with you or is in your place alone enough it would not be hard to find if there was strong motivation. The thing is, it IS a violation of your privacy for him to look that hard. i'm sorry. Link to comment
Samedy Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 msg admin. Ask to change your screenname... He probably found your screen name through whatever email address you have associated with this site. Link to comment
staircase Posted January 14, 2009 Author Share Posted January 14, 2009 He's in a whole other country! He found out because he had a link to a forum of mine where I use the same handle, that I had just created. So, he went on the hunch that I might have another forum by the same username and then searched "by staircase." Apparently he read all my posts, didn't bother with the responses and then sheepishly admitted it to me about a week later. Link to comment
staircase Posted January 14, 2009 Author Share Posted January 14, 2009 msg admin. Ask to change your screenname... He probably found your screen name through whatever email address you have associated with this site. Yeah I am probably going to have to change my screen name and picture, and in other words completely change my identity. This SUCKS! Link to comment
dreamwarrior Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 Now why in the world would he even bother if you two are in another country and broke up???? Do you and him converse sometimes? I mean even trying to be civil to each other? Perhaps he still thinks of you. Link to comment
staircase Posted January 14, 2009 Author Share Posted January 14, 2009 Now why in the world would he even bother if you two are in another country and broke up???? Do you and him converse or perhaps remained friends? We converse...I have been thinking of all the reasons why, and am at a loss. This really is one of the worst feelings. He was so glib about it, too. Just eh, get over it, you would do it too if you knew I was on a forum, it was a challenge as soon as you mentioned it, blah blah. Link to comment
littlestar Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 I wonder why he'd be snooping! Link to comment
LBP Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 What a bum. Does he have any conception of respecting people's privacy? Link to comment
JadedStar Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 WAit, it just dawned on me this is your ex. For some reason i inferred it was your current partner and skipped over the ex part... Hon, it is your ex. He has no business reading your posts and if he does and finds things he doesn't like that is HIS problem. Don't do anytihng differently. If he wants to be an ass and invade your privacy let him go right ahead. Link to comment
staircase Posted January 14, 2009 Author Share Posted January 14, 2009 WAit, it just dawned on me this is your ex. For some reason i inferred it was your current partner and skipped over the ex part... Hon, it is your ex. He has no business reading your posts and if he does and finds things he doesn't like that is HIS problem. Don't do anytihng differently. If he wants to be an ass and invade your privacy let him go right ahead. It's the posts I have about him where I feel vulnerable and show a side of me that might want him back...that make me feel embarrassed and infuriated. Now he has all this info on me, and knows what I have been thinking, and I don't have the same. Lack of reciprocity or something. I know, it sounds childish. Link to comment
Samedy Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 Ask admin to put up a bunch of posts by you about your concerns about penis size.. have them make it look like you wrote them while going out with him... What? Might as well have some fun out of it. *Joke. They probably wouldn't do that. Or would they? Link to comment
staircase Posted January 14, 2009 Author Share Posted January 14, 2009 What a bum. Does he have any conception of respecting people's privacy? No he really doesn't. In the past, while we were together, he read my diary. I have kept a diary since I was a child, and was not going to stop just because he might get to it. Despite explaining how important it was for me to feel as though I had a free outlet, and to respect the fact that I had private thoughts, he read it anyway. It was the worst feeling. It's like I keep getting burnt by him, even when he is seas apart from me! What the heck! Link to comment
staircase Posted January 14, 2009 Author Share Posted January 14, 2009 Ask admin to put up a bunch of posts by you about your concerns about penis size.. have them make it look like you wrote them while going out with him... What? Might as well have some fun out of it. *Joke. They probably wouldn't do that. Or would they? Haha. I love it. Awww, thanks for making me at least smile Link to comment
dreamwarrior Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 Haha. I love it. Awww, thanks for making me at least smile hahahahaha....you beat me to it...I was going to say something similar along those lines...dang your good!!! hahahaha Sorry part of the OP quote from above was supposed to be in here...guess I am not the forum guru...hehe Link to comment
JadedStar Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 It's the posts I have about him where I feel vulnerable and show a side of me that might want him back...that make me feel embarrassed and infuriated. Now he has all this info on me, and knows what I have been thinking, and I don't have the same. Lack of reciprocity or something. I know, it sounds childish. What is childish is that he invaded your privacy. I know you feel embarrassed but realize his actions are actually far more childish and just call it a day. He's an ass. Link to comment
staircase Posted January 14, 2009 Author Share Posted January 14, 2009 What is childish is that he invaded your privacy. I know you feel embarrassed but realize his actions are actually far more childish and just call it a day. He's an ass. He certainly is an ass. I guess my question is, do I just make up a new name on here and continue on as though nothing ever happened? Link to comment
ButterflyWrists Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 make a new account, and just change who u are. I have done it on another forum. You can let your closer friends here know who you are if you wish. I am sure the admins would allow that. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 It's the posts I have about him where I feel vulnerable and show a side of me that might want him back...that make me feel embarrassed and infuriated. Now he has all this info on me, and knows what I have been thinking, and I don't have the same. Lack of reciprocity or something. I know, it sounds childish. Actually, when you think about it, there is indeed reciprocity in the sense that someone who is over you would not waste their time tracking you down on a forum and reading your posts...they would be too busy enjoying their life. So it doesn't sound to me like he is as over you as you thought. Link to comment
who not now Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 nothing you can do about it. Its on the internet he is allowed to see it jsut like everyone elseas long as he didnt use your acount Link to comment
JadedStar Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 make a new account, and just change who u are. I have done it on another forum. You can let your closer friends here know who you are if you wish. I am sure the admins would allow that. She should contact an admin or mod first. Dual accounts are not allowed here if they are not cleared and okay'd first. Staircase I recommend you contact a mod and discuss what a good option would be. Contact DN or avman. They have helped people thru things like this before... Link to comment
staircase Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 She should contact an admin or mod first. Dual accounts are not allowed here if they are not cleared and okay'd first. Staircase I recommend you contact a mod and discuss what a good option would be. Contact DN or avman. They have helped people thru things like this before... Will do, thanks for the tip. Link to comment
.thumb.jpg.2d93ce2472f26b01a1e185382ba0b64e.jpg)
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.