labelle69 Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 how old do you think is the right age to have a baby? Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 -When you can support yourself (and your child financially) -When you are in a healthy environment for raising a child (typically, this means you are in a loving relationship with a supportive partners but I know of women who adopt whie single in their later years) -When you have received an education (I would consider that after a bachelor's degree or special training such as nursing) adequate. However, everyone is different. I wouldn't want to have children until well after my masters. Why are you asking this at such a young age? EDIT: In conclusion, there is no "right" age. However, I think it is best that you make sure that the situation in which you are bringing a child in is as best as it can be. A child deserves nothing less. Link to comment
labelle69 Posted January 13, 2009 Author Share Posted January 13, 2009 oh i just want to know people's opinion thats all. Link to comment
coolgirl Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 my cousin's wife is 34 and she's having their first baby. I think thats a good age to start a family, thats when your finacially ready and wanting to have a family. Link to comment
JeckyllNHyde Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 I completely agree with debaser wold and was going to say something similar: when you're financially and emotionally ready. preferably when you're with the father (as it is easier with 2 parents, but childeren can turn out fine with one as well). to me the so called "right" age is over 21. Perhaps around 25 when you have savings and a good job. (Btw, I still have no clue how working moms hold down a full job AND raise a baby). Just my opinion. Link to comment
lady00 Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 Personally, I am partial to the late 20s, early 30s, but if it does not happen by then or if it's simply not the right time for me when I get to that age, I'd be happy to wait longer. But really, it's more a matter of where you are in life and if you are financially and emotionally read for a child, rather than your age. Link to comment
CAgirl Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 I wouldn't have a baby until I was with someone who would be a good father and husband to me, I was financially stable, I had the career I wanted, and when I was ready to do my best to put my child's needs before my own. But there really is no right age. I'd most likely wait until early 30's Link to comment
BellaDonna Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 how old do you think is the right age to have a baby? I can't speak for everyone- but I personally did not feel old enough or ready until I was 27, married for over 3 years to someone who would be an excellent father, done with my master's degree, owned a home, had a good job with a flexible family-friendly schedule, and known childcare arrangements. My husband and I really, REALLY thought long and hard about having a child before we started trying and had our son. Link to comment
Mythical_Suicide Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 It's not the number that makes it the right time it is the maturity and stability that makes it "right". I had my son at 17 and while it has been far from smooth sailing for us I really wouldn't change anything about it but also wouldn't advise other people my age to go out and have a baby. But if a 20 year old has a stable job, preferably a stable relationship and feels mentally ready I believe they can be just as great of a parent than a 30 year old. Link to comment
Hope75 Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 -When you can support yourself (and your child financially) -When you are in a healthy environment for raising a child (typically, this means you are in a loving relationship with a supportive partners but I know of women who adopt whie single in their later years) -When you have received an education (I would consider that after a bachelor's degree or special training such as nursing) adequate. However, everyone is different. I wouldn't want to have children until well after my masters. Why are you asking this at such a young age? EDIT: In conclusion, there is no "right" age. However, I think it is best that you make sure that the situation in which you are bringing a child in is as best as it can be. A child deserves nothing less. I agree with this (and FYI nursing is a degree program too- I am a nurse. I'm 33 and expecting my first child, and I don't think I would have been ready before. It's different for everyone. My criteria was being married to the right guy (and we've been together and living together for over 6 years and now married), having a college education and a stable job I actually like, owning our home, and being in a position where I felt we were experienced enough to be able to give a child the foundation we feel he or she needs.) If I had gotten pregnant at 20 I would have kept the child and probably been OK but it would have been very difficult. Link to comment
metrogirl Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 It's not the number that makes it the right time it is the maturity and stability that makes it "right". I had my son at 17 and while it has been far from smooth sailing for us I really wouldn't change anything about it but also wouldn't advise other people my age to go out and have a baby. But if a 20 year old has a stable job, preferably a stable relationship and feels mentally ready I believe they can be just as great of a parent than a 30 year old. I agree!....... Link to comment
labelle69 Posted January 13, 2009 Author Share Posted January 13, 2009 hmm i believe a woman cant have a child at 45. Link to comment
Mythical_Suicide Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 hmm i believe a woman cant have a child at 45. Yes, they can. Link to comment
EQD Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 physically a womans prime reproductive years are from 19-25 i think. ... i may have just made that up, but i'm thinking thats close... Link to comment
EQD Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 hmm i believe a woman cant have a child at 45. i know three mothers who had their last children at age 40-41 Link to comment
Hope75 Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 hmm i believe a woman cant have a child at 45. Some women can, not all. Link to comment
lady00 Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 My understanding is that up until a woman goes through menopause, she can have a child, but that it's more rare for women who are closer to the age of menopause...varies by woman, but it's around 50, give or take a few years. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 I agree with this (and FYI nursing is a degree program too- I am a nurse. I'm 33 and expecting my first child, and I don't think I would have been ready before. It's different for everyone. My criteria was being married to the right guy (and we've been together and living together for over 6 years and now married), having a college education and a stable job I actually like, owning our home, and being in a position where I felt we were experienced enough to be able to give a child the foundation we feel he or she needs.) If I had gotten pregnant at 20 I would have kept the child and probably been OK but it would have been very difficult. but aren't there nursing programs that don't require a degree? I was trying to say that either have a degree or a valuable skill that is certified (cosmetic, mechanic, computers) You don't neccessarily need a degree to get a great job if you have a certified skill. That is what I was trying to say. Link to comment
Hope75 Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 but aren't there nursing programs that don't require a degree? I was trying to say that either have a degree or a valuable skill that is certified (cosmetic, mechanic, computers) You don't neccessarily need a degree to get a great job if you have a certified skill. That is what I was trying to say. There used to be diploma programs for nursing but I think they are all but eliminated now. I know what you were saying, I just worked very hard for my nursing degree and felt I needed to clarify. Link to comment
Mythical_Suicide Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 but aren't there nursing programs that don't require a degree? I was trying to say that either have a degree or a valuable skill that is certified (cosmetic, mechanic, computers) You don't neccessarily need a degree to get a great job if you have a certified skill. That is what I was trying to say. Are you thinking about LPNs? I know that is a 1 year program but I think they are still a degree program. Or CNAs? they don't require a degree. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 Are you thinking about LPNs? I know that is a 1 year program but I think they are still a degree program. Or CNAs? they don't require a degree. Well, my mom was looking at an 18 months excellerated program. I have no idea what it is classified. Link to comment
shikashika Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 I'm 31, most of my friends who are having kids are having their first one now... and most are a little older than me. For me, I think 37 will be the perfect age... because i know there are about6 more years of things i want to do before i have kids. My mum and her sisters all had kids in their thirties and forties so i gues that's what i'm used to. I wouldn't want to be a mum who had no life experience for her children. Obviously there are responsible 20 year olds who want nothing more than to have babies, and if they can support them that's fine... i just think a woman should get herself an education, lived with flatmates, lived on her own before she has children. There are other things that are very important to me aside from a career and education, like traveling, living overseas which are soooooo important to me and I couldn't have done that if I had a child at a young age. Also, I think it's important to have relationship experience. I'm glad i've had my share of relationships, flings, times of being single, being dumped, bad times good times. I'm also glad that I had my time to experience people, places and things.. would never have been able to do that if i had a kid. Also, I don't buy the, "but I want to have energy to play with my kids, so i should have them when I am young" A friend of mine, his mum had him when she was 41, and when he was 19 they went off and treked the Anapurna circuit in Nepal( 25 day hike I believe) and my parents were a little older and we went on biking trips and they still compete in sports today. It's all up to the mpther if she feels like staying in shape. so yeah, I say early thirties and up.. mid thirties is a good time too! Link to comment
live.ur.life Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 When you are mentally mature and have the financial means to support a child AND yourself. Link to comment
Alezia Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 I originally wanted my kids in my late twenties to early thirties, but obviously that fell through. I am very blessed for the fact that our situation worked out nicely! I was one semester short of my VERY LONG Bachelor's Degree (took me like 5.5 years with the pregnancy's semester off and coop to complete). My partner was able to support me during that time (I had some money savings before), and although we were a bit short on spending money, we were able to make a trip to Europe, buy a mazda 3 and still have some savings. We have no debt, not even car payments and are working towards a home. Now we'll both be working and have a great income, but I know we are the exception income-wise rather than the norm at this age. It is a factor that is really important though, as I could see how we would fight a lot otherwise!! It's true that you need to modify your life a big deal. Wake up earlier, have less free time, but I believe it all comes down to parenting style. If you are hip attached to your baby and don't want to let him get babysat for his first year, then you will obviously suffer more in the free-time department. I accept that I will never be able to live a year abroad at the moment, but I will be able to get a paid sabbatical year a few years down the line. God knows what I will do then =) So while I wouldn't recommend it to most early 20's people, it can work out for some greatly =) Link to comment
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