ideas ?

[jupiter32]

hey.

 

question for you all.

 

worked with my partner for many years.

she separated from her husband and six weeks later we started dating.

going well enough but worried about what she might be going through....

 

ideas ? suggestions ?

[nutbrownhare]

Depending on her relationship with her ex, she will have a certain amount of grieving to work through. If she had been 'winding down' from him for a while, and she initiated the split, this will be a lot less traumatic than if she were still in love with him, and he'd initiated it.

 

If everything's going well between you, don't worry, if she wants to talk about what she's going through - she will!

 

Are you worried about the effects of her split on the relationship you two have?

[jupiter32]

hey.

thanks for that.

yeah they were winding down for a year or two.

 

we have a good realtionship but sometimes we argue.

this argument stuff is new for me and her as we never really argued with previous partners....

[nutbrownhare]

hey.

thanks for that.

yeah they were winding down for a year or two.

 

we have a good realtionship but sometimes we argue.

this argument stuff is new for me and her as we never really argued with previous partners....

 

Depends on the arguments ... if you NEVER argue with a partner, chances are that one or other of you is sitting on their feelings and things never get resolved. Eventually this will kill the relationship.

 

If they're arguments where both of you feel free to voice your opinions without trying to hurt or punish the other, and they get resolved to the satisfaction of both, or workable compromises can be made - this is healthy and a part of a good relationship. Unless you find yourself arguing again and again about the same thing, which had previously seemed to be resolved.

 

If they're frequent arguments which go on and on, with no possibility for any resolution because they're actually about one person dominating the other, and leave both of you feeling drained and exhausted - only for exactly the same issue to arise again soon - this is toxic and you might want to look at the whole relationship.

 

You say 'sometimes we argue' - this sounds healthy to me!

 

Hope this helps!