Dilemma - what do we do!!!

[Darkness_Falls]

Ok so I was just going about life as normal and then BAM, my SO says something that has now turned our lives upside down. Although a final decision hasn't been made. Ok, so, me and my bf live together in a flat with our mutual friend. Our rent is pretty low so we are quite lucky. He has to travel an hour to work and an hour back each day. I get a bus which takes around 15 minutes. I work in a private school as an admin assistant and my wages aren't too bad and go up by 2% each year. My bf works at an IT company and has done for 6 years. He doesn't like it too much anymore because the people give him hassle and he doesn't find it as interesting nowadays.

 

Yesterday he said to me that it would be pretty cool to live where my parents live in a small village, and to work for them. They own a petrol station, shop and garage. The village is idyllic and friendly. My dad is looking to retire in the next few years so there is possibility of moving home and learning the ropes, then taking over the business together.

 

Right now we live in the city (Edinburgh) and are trying to start saving money for a house deposit. Edinburgh is notorious for being expensive to buy property in so not sure what we would be able to afford. He is quite happy to leave his job and he doesn't go out with friends much here. I don't mind my job, it's not too bad. I get paid quite a lot for sitting around and not doing all that much. But now this opportunity has arisen back home... we don't know what to do! It is 4 hours from Edinburgh, it's a tiny little village. We would live with my parents for a bit until we got our own place. The wages would be basically what we are getting at the moment but they wouldn't go up by much year by year. Once we took on the business though we would have all the money that it makes. It would be hard work. I would miss my friends in Edinburgh, although I only have 2 close friends here. I do have a few friends back in the village.

 

So we have no idea what to do, it feels completely split down the middle. What would you do in this situation? Being my own boss sounds really cool. I used to work in the shop when I was younger and I was put in charge of it often, especially when my parents went on holiday. In my job just now I'm basically at the bottom. My SO has never worked in retail so I hope he doesn't underestimate all the work that would need to be done.

 

Decisions!!!

 

By the way, I'm 24 and my SO is 22.

[HealingHandsWarmHeart]

I think you are both young enough to take a chance on the career change... and start something new.

 

If you were both at jobs that you absolutely loved.. living in an area where you both had active social lives... and loved where you lived..i would say ..eh.. i wouldn't take the chance..

 

but since you aren't attached to your lives now...i say take the chance you never know what might come your way.

[alli]

Ask your parents what they think. They might like the idea eventually, but you need to have a good idea of when they are going to retire or else you all will be splitting the income of the business.

 

Also, how far is this village from the place you currently work? What if you & your bf found a place midway between Edinburgh & the village.. would it be feasible for you to commute to your current job & your bf to commute to your parents' each day to learn the ropes? Or are they too far apart?

[DN]

The first thing to find out is if your parents would be enthusiastic about this - and I mean enthusiastic rather than feeling obligated to go along with the idea.

[Darkness_Falls]

Grrr I just typed a bit reply and lost it! Oh well, start again. Sorry I forgot to mention that we have talked about it with my parents and they are reacting positively to it although we all agree that a lot would have to be discussed and sorted out before it could happen. We would be looking to do it this year possibly, in May. The village is 130 miles from Edinburgh so it would be a big change. Me and SO are tired with the travelling we do each day, often my bus is late, up to 45 mins late sometimes. If we moved back home, the business would be accross the road from my mum and dads house. We would look to purchase a place hopefully within a year or 2 of being there.

 

I would miss the city because me and my SO are into the metal scene, although he doesn't go out so much. I used to go out to clubs a lot but not so much anymore. There isn't much of a rock/metal scene in the village or the town 8 miles from it but there are pubs. And I do have 2 close girl-friends who live in the town.

 

I feel it would be a great opportunity. Basically, we would learn the ropes for about 2-3 years and gradually take on the management of it. We would be paid salaries of similar to what we get at the moment but it probably wouldn't increase. After those few years we would look to take on the business ourselves. The thing is, it would be a big committment. My parents are looking for it to be taken on long term and not just given up within a few years. So we would be looking at possibly a permanent move. Which would be fine because me and SO love the village, there is a primary school there and a high school in the town. We plan to have kids in around 4-5 years. I miss my family like crazy because I don't get to see them often, it takes 4 hours on the train to see them, and it's often only for a weekend unless I take the time off work, which I do during easter and Christmas. SO doesn't see his family very much as it is so he feels he isn't sacrificing too much.

 

I'm split down the middle completely, its such a big change but could be so good!