pboy Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 im just curious on everyones opinion on promiscuity. i know a single guy/girl is gonna play, and i guess thats normal these days(?). i dont know if there any average statistics or anything on the number of partners someone has had, but i got into a conversation with a friend over the difference of a "sl*t" and someone who is 'promiscuous'. i guess it all depends on the person? but is 4-7 partners in a year something normal these days? i guess my outlook might be outdated since im not very sexually active. i have both guy/girlfriends who would sleep with just about anyone. i have some that get to know "a friend" for a little before sleeping with them. Link to comment
savignon Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 Everyone is very different and labels don't serve much purpose. If you're turned off by someone who's had a lot of partners, it doesn't matter what you call them....they're just not for you. I do think sex is much more casual these days and that (to me) is all the more reason to be extra careful, extra safe, extra cautious about who you're with, etc. etc.... Link to comment
Supa_gurl Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 I personally think that many is a little much. I wonder what ever happened to loving someone first? Link to comment
bmwm3 Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 yeah its tuff, i love sex.. but i am turned off with a women that has had many partners.... Link to comment
pboy Posted January 7, 2009 Author Share Posted January 7, 2009 so whats too many partners, in your opinion? Link to comment
midnightrambler Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 so whats too many partners, in your opinion? one more than me Link to comment
bmwm3 Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 so whats too many partners, in your opinion? probally get flamed for this, but lets say i meet a 26yr, and we could have a long term rel... for a 26 yr anything more then 6-8 is too much for me... thats why i never ask or wanna know, because i will be in for a disapointment Link to comment
Mutley Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 so whats too many partners, in your opinion? I don't care. Although the more experience the better. IHMHO. But really, it's none of anybodies business concerning anybody's sexual history. Link to comment
savignon Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 Guys seem to have such a double standard on the issue. I mean do the math....if you and all your friends are sleeping around....you're sleeping around with girls who are doing the same thing! If girls behaved the way men wanted them to, they'd have nobody to have sex with!! It wouldn't work! Originally Posted by pboy so whats too many partners, in your opinion? one more than me Hypocryte!!! I'm really saying this all in good fun. Sex can be casual and fun and sex can be meaningful and loving...we all know the difference and because someone has done both, doesn't mean they don't know the difference or have no self respect. You can decide that you're not interested in a girl b/c their "number" turns you off, but you don't need to go name calling. There was a woman last week who posted on this site as a 30-something virgin and she got SLAMMED...guys telling her they wouldn't date a 30 year old virgin, accused of her lying, accused her of being manipulative.....I mean, you just can't win!!! Anyways, if a guy every shamed me about my past, I wouldn't be interested in them either, so I guess it all works out. Link to comment
Pressfit Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 The whole thing about the actual number is pointless anyway, particularly at the onset. How would you really know for sure at first since people will say whatever they feel depending on the circumstances they're in. This is simply a matter of using your best judgement based on what behavior you observe of someone instead of trying to rely on stuff you are told. Only after long periods of getting to know someone, as in a relationship, does all this become (truly) evident. Even then, so do you call it all off once you spent a year, or two, or three when these figures don't coencide with you personal limitations. Link to comment
blue69 Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 Seriously would make very little difference to me. People's sexual behaviors are totally up to them. But I think when we look for partners in life we try to find people who have similar beliefs to us. If we are conservative with sex and they are free spirited it might indicate a clash of beliefs. Something that needs to be addressed and considered for long term potential. If one can't change their behaviors (especially with sexuality) to match their partners it might result in a lot of frustration and future misunderstandings. I say be true to yourself. If you enjoy casual sex, then go ahead. Be knowledgeable and understand the risks involved but make the decision that fits you best. Link to comment
Binoo Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 I think it depends on your opinions on what exactly sex is. Some people see it as an emotional act and some see it as a mechanical one. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 as long as they are careful about it, no big deal. i like very sexual women. i really don't wan them telling me they just did it with a guy 2 days ago though. rather not hear that. but 4-7 a year? that's fine if you think about it. 365 days / 7 = 52 days in between if evenly spaced out. not bad at all. Link to comment
amtjrtcet Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 im just curious on everyones opinion on promiscuity. i know a single guy/girl is gonna play, and i guess thats normal these days(?). i dont know if there any average statistics or anything on the number of partners someone has had, but i got into a conversation with a friend over the difference of a "sl*t" and someone who is 'promiscuous'. i guess it all depends on the person? but is 4-7 partners in a year something normal these days? i guess my outlook might be outdated since im not very sexually active. i have both guy/girlfriends who would sleep with just about anyone. i have some that get to know "a friend" for a little before sleeping with them. Age usually plays a part here....I haven't had sex in a long time...3 yrs ago I'd of called up a old friend by now to take care of business....I was 'promiscuous' when I was younger....now I'm just a older version whos wiser to all the risks involved with 'promiscuity'.....doesn't mean I don't still want to do it.... Link to comment
TBE_1989 Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 I know how the OP feels. I'm ten times more inclined to be attracted to someone who values sex as an emotional as well as a physical experience and who believes that sex is best between two people in love. In an ideal world, my perfect partner wouldn't have had a ginormous number of sexual partners. However, you can't change someone's past! I know a lot of people, guys particularly, who have slept around and been promiscuous in the past, but are now in faithful, committed relationships where sex is really valued. Furthermore, I know a lot of people who used to behave promiscuously but do not anymore - even though they are still single, they simply had a change of heart about their behaviour. Link to comment
pboy Posted January 7, 2009 Author Share Posted January 7, 2009 im not in for name calling, or whatever. i just wanted to hear everyone elses opinions and such. my guy friends sleep around a lot, but thats them. sex is just sex to them. maybe because i havent had a lot of experience, sex still means 'something' to me? i really like this girl because of who she is, but she's also very promiscuous...and it just bothers the living crap out of me. its like with every guy friend she has. but i still want her for her....its a big personal issue battle Link to comment
Sparkly Eyes Posted January 8, 2009 Share Posted January 8, 2009 im not in for name calling, or whatever. i just wanted to hear everyone elses opinions and such. my guy friends sleep around a lot, but thats them. sex is just sex to them. maybe because i havent had a lot of experience, sex still means 'something' to me? i really like this girl because of who she is, but she's also very promiscuous...and it just bothers the living crap out of me. its like with every guy friend she has. but i still want her for her....its a big personal issue battle nothing wrong with that really! a guy that sleeps around would be a total turn off and I dont want to go for them no matter how much I like other aspects of their personality, I can be their friends but that's about it! Link to comment
kuiks8 Posted January 8, 2009 Share Posted January 8, 2009 im not in for name calling, or whatever. i just wanted to hear everyone elses opinions and such. my guy friends sleep around a lot, but thats them. sex is just sex to them. maybe because i havent had a lot of experience, sex still means 'something' to me? i really like this girl because of who she is, but she's also very promiscuous...and it just bothers the living crap out of me. its like with every guy friend she has. but i still want her for her....its a big personal issue battle well do her a favour and just be her friend...i would think there would be nothing worse than being with someone who would be unwilling to look beyond your past and see you as the person you are today. I can't believe people have a # that would mean they would write off a person...there are sooo many factors that go in to sexual pasts and the choices people make. By all means look out for your own safety, require that they get tested but to write someone off b/c they have had more partners than you, especially without knowing their reasons or backgrounds is astounding to me... Link to comment
Sparkly Eyes Posted January 8, 2009 Share Posted January 8, 2009 well do her a favour and just be her friend...i would think there would be nothing worse than being with someone who would be unwilling to look beyond your past and see you as the person you are today. I can't believe people have a # that would mean they would write off a person...there are sooo many factors that go in to sexual pasts and the choices people make. By all means look out for your own safety, require that they get tested but to write someone off b/c they have had more partners than you, especially without knowing their reasons or backgrounds is astounding to me... sometimes it is their past, sometimes it is in their lifestyle! I don't like when a person's mindset is when I am single I have a different partner every weekend. It is not the number that is turn off, it is the way they decided about their sexual life. But if someone was promiscuous in the past and does not want to be anymore, I would not have problem with it and try to overlook his past. Link to comment
laisla Posted January 8, 2009 Share Posted January 8, 2009 it's somewhat like the difference between a street hooker and an escort. it's only reputation-based, not much difference with the numbers. Link to comment
midnightrambler Posted January 8, 2009 Share Posted January 8, 2009 sometimes it is their past, sometimes it is in their lifestyle! I don't like when a person's mindset is when I am single I have a different partner every weekend. It is not the number that is turn off, it is the way they decided about their sexual life. QUOTE] well said Link to comment
Day_Walker Posted January 8, 2009 Share Posted January 8, 2009 First of all promiscuity is nothing new, it has been going on since the beginning of time. Defining a promiscuous person and a " * * * * " is something that is going to be extremely subjective and will have a lot to deal with how a person views sex and sexual activity. I think that you have to set up standards that you think are acceptable regardless of them being "normal" compared to the people that you hang out with. Link to comment
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