What's a normal rate of dating in a relationship?

[Mantis]

Never dated, college age, etc. You know the story. Anyway, I'm wondering how often you're supposed to go on dates at the beginning of a relationship, and how far you're supposed to plan ahead.

 

So if I'm asking out a girl for the first time, how far away should the date be? A few day? A week? Now let's say the date happens and goes well. How long do I wait before I ask her out again? And is the time gap the same here between asking out and actually going out? Finally, at what point are we... I dunno, able to just hang out at each other's houses without all the formal dating stuff? And once we're at that point, should we continue formal dates? And how often?

 

I'm sure everyone is going to say it's different for every relationship, but even a ballpark figure would help.

[ghost69]

every situation is different. some people are busier than others. twice a week is a good start.

[xCOREx]

why are you worried about the normal? ppl seem to wait a while dating for like 2 years and then marry it seems. it also seems that most will get serious after 3-6 months. at college age most seem to move in when they get serious. i say most seem because its my perception but it may be skewed as i move way faster with my heart and i drop everything when i feel in love to give that relationship the best chance. I figure why wait if it is the one then thats all the more time you can experience it and if not then you waste less time. but then again i suppose its not really a waste you learn but lets say you then spend less time without the one. also i say couple times a week seems normal and half way in between the both of ya. i like to keep things 50/50 always. plus it can be fun exploring places you both dont go often makes you both a lil vunerable.

[laisla]

Mantis, there are no rules. just do what you and your partner are comfortable with.

[confused25]

If you are asking a girl out for a date, I'd say plan to have it setup within a week. If you drag it out too long they might lose interest.

 

If the first date goes well, at the end of the date ask her what she thinks about having a 2nd date. Otherwise, I'd send her a text the next day letting her know that you had a great time and if she would like to go on a 2nd date with you. Either one of those methods is fine.

[Mantis]

I realize there are no set rules, but I'm worried that if I'm too far outside social norms girls might be put off. Anyway, a few days to a week and asking for another date the next day sounds good. Thanks.

[COtuner]

In my day (God I sound old) it was usually asking out early in the week for a Friday night, and by Wed for a Sat night until you'd been out 2 or 3 times, in which case calling up with a day's notice or less was usually the "norm"

 

As for how often, I'd say it falls between "not so often it keeps her from getting her homework done" and "every other week"