Met Ex in a gathering..confused about what he's thinking...

[ThisXmas]

I met with him during an outing with some Church friends and we had a really good time. For most of the hike I pretend nothing happened between us and just treated him as usual. I am always happy with friends hiking anyway and had fun with others as well. Just a couple moments I'd like to sit on the top of the mountain and think about him and be sad a little. I was also joking around with another guy who seems to be somewhat interested in me, who always teases me whenever there's a chance.

 

I don't know if it made any change when I teased back when we got to the top and on the way back I felt like my Ex started to just walk next to me. Either right in front of me or right after me, for almost most of the way down. We had a lot of fun hiding and scaring people.

 

After that we had a small party and there were a few gatherings, some were eating and some were watching TV. He was talking on phone for a long time possibly about business and as soon as he came back to the room he sit just accross/next to me. It just happened that he played throwing and catching a very soft ball with another man. I joined in and started to take revenge on the ball and hit him whenever possible. Part of me wanted him to know that although I hold myself perfectly fine in front of others and him, I still miss him and am angry with his decision of dumping me. He played with me for quite a while until I hit him quite a few times with ball and he obviously got my message. Somehow he picked up the ball and gave it to me and left the room. I think he was sad. And I thought maybe I did too much. Maybe I really hurt him? I guess it won't be too painful? Or he was scared others will find out there was something between us beyond friends?

 

Anyway, the longer he doesn't contact me, the less hope I have that he will contact me again. Now I went to the gathering after 1 week of NC and I'm afraid he is a LOT more relieved and thought that I will continue to be friends again. But my instinct tells me from what he did yesterday he still misses me. But I don't know if it's enough for him to go against his initial decision and come back. He broke up mainly based on the wrong timing and differences between us. I think I did a good job showing the good side of me yesterday, maybe except the part of abusing him with the small ball.

 

I guess I may go back to church gathering once a week and will see him there. I don't know where this will take me though. I feel like he is not changing his mind even if he still likes me or maybe he is not that type of guy? confused.

[Pandaman211]

Don't worry too much about "types". Types don't affect if someone is coming back or not. Types simply expedite or prolong the process of coming back for someone that genuinely wants to be with you and is still in love with you (or finds this out).

 

Yeah I'm not really sure why you abused him with the ball, lol. Pretty funny stuff. Don't look into him walking with you on the way down after you were somewaht flirting with the other guy, I dont want to burst your bubble, but us guys don't like other men messing with our women, if we dumped them. This could mean he still is somewhat not over you, or w/e, but something that we don't conclusively know.

 

Go to church based on how you feel/if you have a desire to, try not to put too much basis on your ex, but I know its pretty tough NOT to. You won't be able to tell whats on his mind until there has legitimately been time/space between you guys, and also maybe after a few interactions. The key is consistency, and we can't see any consistency in his behavior b/c this is your first interaction with him. If you do end up seeing him a few more times at church in the near future, then it'll be easier, obviously, to see if there are any for sure assumptions you can make.