Sev Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 Ok, i need your opinions please..... the story goes, we were in love nothing wrong at all then suddenyl for the last 2 weeks of our relationship she becomes distant. I noticed this and couldnt get a answer out of her, in this time she was goign out with her friend to the pictures, from like 2pm to 10:15 etc, and came back smelling of wine and went straight to bed. We break up on 20/12 then a week later a new guy appears on the scene, who she apprently just got with...... I asked her she denies the fact that she was seeing him before. It just doesnt add up to me though. I dont know if i feel angry or upset or what anymore, my life is in tatters. Link to comment
Lionel Hutz Posted January 6, 2009 Share Posted January 6, 2009 Question: Does it matter? If you guys are through, what good would come of it if you found out? She could lie and say she didn't, and you wont believe her. She can tell you she did, and you'll be livid. I know it sounds blunt, but move on, she did. Link to comment
Gordon5k Posted January 6, 2009 Share Posted January 6, 2009 Never mind mate life is hard love is hell Whatever it is it's going to go away when you meet the right gal Link to comment
Sev Posted January 6, 2009 Author Share Posted January 6, 2009 I see what your saying, tbh i feel a little closure from it, i kinda see now that she didnt love me at all and those thoughts of wantin her back are kinda fading. But to be honest, from this it looks clear as day that she was, even if she denies it. Link to comment
wastedlove Posted January 6, 2009 Share Posted January 6, 2009 Im afraid you will never know the honest answer the that question but all arrows would point to say that yes she did cheat, but the fact remains that she left you and she is now with someone else, face this which for some reason wont hurt as much as you think. You dont know what you feel because you are hurting you need to let it out and start the healing process, i feel for you buddy, first thing you should do is start no contact and stick to it for at least 2 months, be well buddy! a lot of people have been where you are now you just have to ride the wave and try and get throught it. Link to comment
Lionel Hutz Posted January 6, 2009 Share Posted January 6, 2009 I see what your saying, tbh i feel a little closure from it, i kinda see now that she didnt love me at all and those thoughts of wantin her back are kinda fading. But to be honest, from this it looks clear as day that she was, even if she denies it. Well then why hash over something that is likely. Shes a loser, and you can see what a cheater is like for future reference. You win in my opinion, not that it was a game but...... Link to comment
Sev Posted January 6, 2009 Author Share Posted January 6, 2009 i really want no contact, i do, i keep trying, i went all today no worries, then i just had the sudden realisation of this and had to text her. she obviously denied it but i just dont know. But in a way i know my trust for her has gone now so i know i dont want her back, how could i? Trust is the foundation of anything to be honest. Im not beating myself up, i didnt do anything bad, i was a great guy, its her who has the problem. With NC though, unfortunately i know i have to see her to sort out the house and our stuff. Im going to try nc for a week then hopefuly get things sorted and just get rid of her out of my life. She wants to be friends, i told her after this, even if she didnt cheat, the timing of it all over xmas etc couldnt of hurt me more if she tried. I dont want her friendship, i wanted our relationship. I dont know this person who has done this to me and i dont want to know her! I just hope i survive this though its sending me insane! Link to comment
catfeeder Posted January 6, 2009 Share Posted January 6, 2009 Who knows--maybe she spent the two weeks flirting and setting him up before breaking up with you. She's not going to be honest with you if she did cheat, since cheaters aren't honest--so why dwell there? Get tested for STD's, and when you're found clean, see this as dodging a bullet and renew your focus on new chance at life. In your corner. Link to comment
Sev Posted February 17, 2009 Author Share Posted February 17, 2009 Man i was a mess when i made this thread, just going to bump this a little, if your new to the break up scene, im just under 2 months in, still plays on my mind a little but when i made this thread i was a irrational mess. It really does get better, just keep going forward, each day it gets a little better. You will have set backs and days you just dont want to face the world, but look through peoples posts. Everyone comes here and starts off as a wreck who will do anything then slowly but surely we all start to come round. MY advise would be no contact asap. Forget getting back together, you will always think they are the one 100%, its not until you see it in the cold light of day you realise how bad they treat you because to be honest, there long over you by the time they finnished it, otherwise why would they break it off? Its a harsh truth. This forum is great though, just try not to get too lost in the false hope. Sometimes it is genuine hope and it works out, but remember the odds are stacked against you. If i ever get in this situation again i garuntee nothing but cold hard no contact is what i will do! Until your emotions have settled down dont waste your time fighting. This is my humble opinion believe me when i say, i thought my relationship was different and mine was special and not like anyone elses and that i was going to get her back because its meant to be etc.. i believed it 150%! Good luck to anyone fresh into this. Its a very hard time. Peace Sev/c Link to comment
mikeni1225 Posted February 17, 2009 Share Posted February 17, 2009 i totally agree with you Link to comment
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