I'm scarred of getting hurt, but I really like him?

[juliet5969]

My name is Juliet. I have been in a releationship with a man who is amazing in many ways. We've been seeing eachother over 2 mos now. He is very uncomfortable expressing his feeling or emotions & does not like it when I do. He never complements me by saying im beautiful or I look nice. However, I know he thinks I'm beautiful. I knoe he carres for me & really like me too. In a video store this weekend he pointed to the cover of a movie with a beautiful woman with vertually no make up & sd "that's you with no make up" it was flattering & I guess his way of telling me. The chemestry we have is undenyable him a scorpio myself a taurus & All the emotions & feelings he wont express verbally he expresses intamately. He is very touchy feely & cuddley when were alone. Today we were around a lot of our friends & I got the impression he didn't want to b close to me & in the end when he left never even said goodbye. Also all the good morning & good night texts & sweet sayings from time to time have stopped. After seeing him I usually wont hear from him for about 2 days then hell come over to my house to hang out. We had a conversation a couple weeks ago where I told him I don't think hes ready for what I want. (I told him 2nd date I'm not looking for a boytoy but my future husband) When I told him maybe we should just break it off before him or myself get hurt. He sd no we have too much in common lets just keep taking it slow. But at this point it feels too slow & I'm afraid im gonna get hurt.

 

I've decided to be unavailable for about a week or so & then when we see eachother next I'm going to try to have a conversation with him. I'm just not sure how to go about it. He dosen't like expressing feeling or emotions. The bottom line for me is that if we can't have healthey communication & I cant get him to show me more feeling or at least that he really wants me in public not just in the bedroom , then maybe hes just not the one.

 

What should I do? Why does he act this way when I know he really carres about me? How do I start the conversation so he will be open to me? Please help!!!

[coolgirl]

Hi Juliet,

 

I had the same thing going on myself about 2 months ago. With a guy that has a hard time opening up his emotions and really expressing how he feels. I wasn't asking him to freely open up to me opening up as to being comfortable with me to communicate with me. I know in some form it can be frustrating because your trying to communicate with him and he's not helping and your at your last straw on what to do. My best advice is you have to do is what is right for you. If your scared of getting hurt maybe it time to move on to the next one, as hard as it sounds trust me but i'm sure you also want to end up with someone that can show some kind of emotion. For me it was like talking to a wall. lol. I didnt want to waste my time and effort in doing all the work when he's a zombie. LOL. hope this helps.

[cruzer]

I think u need to be honest with him, but not in a rude way, try to be nice.

 

Tell him exactly what u are missing from him, what u want from him, what u want him to try and work on to help the relationship.

 

If he cares about u, he will listen and change. If he does not care for u, like u think he does, nothing will change and that will be your sign.

 

Maybe im wrong, but i know if i cared about a girl enough and she wanted me to work on something that did not change who i am, i would do it in a heartbeat.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Don't play games with him and be "unavailable". If he has to be rude to you in public and only shows his "feelings" to you in the bedroom then maybe it is time to end this. Are you two exclusive...are you officially boyfriend/girlfriend?