Moving out

[cichlid]

I got the job I wanted and I am moving away from home, finally! I will be living about an hour and a half away so I will be driving up to see my boyfriend when I can.

 

I am counting down the days that I drive to my new apartment and sign a lease. Freedom sounds so great right know. It's really sad but my mom is being a bit difficult lately. She yells about EVERYTHING! It's making this Monday a goal. I am going to the BSC National Championship Bowl and will be leaving that day. Then when I get back, I'm packing up and moving.

 

How do I keep the tension down between us for the last few days that I will be living here?

[catfeeder]

ConrAts on your new job! Best way I can think of to keep the tension down would be to sit with Mom for a minute, tell her you really do love her, and ask her, "What can I do to help make the next few days good between us?" Then do whatever-the-whatever she wants. What's a few days of generosity?

 

In your corner.

[onewithbooks]

Cichlid,

 

Just be patient with your mom. Remember just as much as you are excited to move out and your emotions are running high, yours are not the only ones. I imagine that your mom is feeling a lot of crazy emotions too. You are her child and you are moving a long way away, and she wont be there to watch your every move. While that sounds like a blessing to you, its scary for her. She just wants the best for you and to not have you be hurt or make mistakes.

 

Is she handling this the best way she can? Probably not. But that is something that you need to accept, you can't change her behavior or emotions. What you can do is accept them and empathize with her. Is it easy? Nope. But by doing so you may get a better response. The next time she snaps just say "Whoa Mom, now just a minute. Tell me again what you need/why you are mad. If you already know that answer, say, "Ok Mom, I see, you want me to do xyz. Let me finish this here and the minute I am done I will take care of it."

 

Having a little empathy might go a long way with her, and in turn will make for a smoother transition for when you go.

 

I know exactly where you are coming from. I will be in your shoes in a few months. My mom and I are close, and I dont know what I will do when I dont see her everyday and I am able to hug her. This does not mean there arent times I just want her to stop speaking because I cant take it anymore. You only have a few days left. You wont ever get these days back. Try and make the most of them.

[cichlid]

I've lived on my own since Thursday now. It feels good to have my own place to call home. My mom and I seem to be doing better. In fact, she seemed to calm down while I was in Florida. I call her almost everyday. Thank you everyone for your advice! I really appreciate all the comments.