littlestar Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 Nothing more to say i miss him so much and it hurts Link to comment
saltandvinegar Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 You broke up with him- is it more that he did not chase you for any length of time after the break up? That he moved on? Is it your ego that is bruised? You left him because of his addictions- which are very serious and valid reasons. Are you sure you are not just romanticising the time you had? Link to comment
hereagain Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 Posts like this always make me sad... knowing what it feels like, my heart breaks for others feeling the same. all you want is for them to want you again, remember what great times you had. The last thing you want to hear from people are those cliche lines and I know we have ALL heard them... There are plenty of fish in the sea, He wasn't good enough/didn't deserve you.. You are better off.. You need time to be angry, hurt, upset, miss your ex. Only time, with the added support of friends/counsellors, and a willingness to learn from the experience and then finally, reflection and realisation will get you back to where you need to be. Be well, xx Link to comment
stabbedintheback Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 Nothing more to say i miss him so much and it hurts You are not alone. There are many of us in the same boat. This site helps out tremendously! Link to comment
YZRiderF Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 I have been missing my ex alot lately too. I made the mistake of reading a letter I wrote for her but never sent. Link to comment
beejcee Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 tonight i stumbled upon my engagement rings and our wedding rings. i haven't looked at them since i took them off the day i filed for divorce. it made me miss what we shared then so much.... i saw a quote once that stated something like: you can divorce your spouse but you can't divorce your memories. i am sending good wishes to all of us that have these sad moments..... bless you! Link to comment
littlestar Posted January 5, 2009 Author Share Posted January 5, 2009 You broke up with him- is it more that he did not chase you for any length of time after the break up? That he moved on? Is it your ego that is bruised? You left him because of his addictions- which are very serious and valid reasons. Are you sure you are not just romanticising the time you had? Its far from that. It's that i still love him very much and i wish there was a way we could be together forever. Link to comment
stabbedintheback Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 I know in one of your other threads you mentioned something about maybe breaking NC. What did you decide? Do you think your ex has gotten help yet? Link to comment
coldplay. Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 Is it really him you want to be together with forever? Or a modified version of who he really is? If you broke up with him you must have thought it wasnt going to work. The best way in my mind to do them right, and do yourself right is to just move on. Youve just gotta be ready for a random day you get a call out of the blue. Btw if your really down, watching a good movie really helped me. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Link to comment
heaven66 Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 im sad too so you are not alone..i did something to piss mine off and we spoke Friday for the last time at 1:30 then he called my daughters phone and spoke to her about 3 times and the last time asked for me..he then spoke to me for 4 minutes..he was scolding me about what i did...the no more calls until today...called me 3 times and you can tell that he is getting over being mad...but i haven't seen him in 3 days and i miss him so much......I know it's nothing compared to what you guys are going through but still I feel your pain. Good Luck and I hope it gets easier. Link to comment
ryan2000 Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 I miss her too. 7 month on...........and i'm still the same old pathetic heartbroken fool i was when she told me 'No' to a second chance................ IDIOT! Sorry for you all! Link to comment
Seymore Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 Nothing more to say i miss him so much and it hurts I've been keeping up with your posts here and there, and I think I've said it before, but I'm in the same boat as you. You wish you could change a couple of things around in the world and that would be all your life needs to be perfect. It sucks that it doesn't work that way. I'm slowly coming to terms with the fact that what I miss were the good times, and those were coming further and further between near the end. I miss the idea of a life full of smiles and happiness with her, but I know the reality is far different. I feel for you. I really, really do. Link to comment
littlestar Posted January 5, 2009 Author Share Posted January 5, 2009 I know in one of your other threads you mentioned something about maybe breaking NC. What did you decide? Do you think your ex has gotten help yet? I havent broken NC yet. I am waiting for him to. He was always trying to before and now he has gone super quiet. This is telling me he has moved on from me (which i highly doubt), he is afraid of m rejecting him AGAIN, or he is actually getting help for himself and using this time effectively. For all i know he might even be in rehab. Link to comment
stabbedintheback Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 I havent broken NC yet. I am waiting for him to. He was always trying to before and now he has gone super quiet. This is telling me he has moved on from me (which i highly doubt), he is afraid of m rejecting him AGAIN, or he is actually getting help for himself and using this time effectively. For all i know he might even be in rehab. I envy you for being so good with NC. I am weak Right now, my ex and I seem to be playing games, which I hate. We text, we call, some times she texts right back and sometime it is 10 minutes to the "T". Crazy right. I am up and down, I can barely take it anymore. We spoke a month ago and I told her I wanted another chance. She told me she believes we are on the right track by talking, etc.... But with all the ups and downs I am getting confused. Not bringing up the relationship. Talked with her on the phone and almost brought it up, but I didn't. Liek you, part of me really wants to move on (which I think may be better) but part of me doesn't want the chance of rejection just like you are thinking about. We can all give you advice, but you are the only one who can make that decision. With whatever you decide, I hope it brings you great happiness. We are all here for one another. Link to comment
JadedStar Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 if this is an ex who continually did you wrong i would suggest focusing more on the bad things in the relationship and stop focusing on what you perceived was great, and stop romanticizing it. this is a big mistake most people make. Once you stop thinking about the good things and force your mind to remember why you left it helps stop the obsessive cycle of thinking of them constantly. Link to comment
heaven66 Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 if this is an ex who continually did you wrong i would suggest focusing more on the bad things in the relationship and stop focusing on what you perceived was great, and stop romanticizing it. this is a big mistake most people make. Once you stop thinking about the good things and force your mind to remember why you left it helps stop the obsessive cycle of thinking of them constantly. What Jade says is so true...I remember when I wanted to forget my ex i just started thinking about the bad things he did..and it took time but it really did help alot. Link to comment
bartender69 Posted January 12, 2009 Share Posted January 12, 2009 hey, same boat. very very lonely. and shes with someone else she claims to be in love with already right after we ended our relationship 8 months ago been eight months, was getting better till i broke NC yesterday. worst thing i ever did. i feel like im back to square one. Link to comment
Ashsun87 Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 I miss my ex too guys, so much. You really are not alone. Link to comment
julioiglesia Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 tonight i stumbled upon my engagement rings and our wedding rings. i haven't looked at them since i took them off the day i filed for divorce. it made me miss what we shared then so much.... i saw a quote once that stated something like: you can divorce your spouse but you can't divorce your memories. i am sending good wishes to all of us that have these sad moments..... bless you! That is a powerful quote beejcee. almost 8 months of NC and still nostalgic, I miss the companionship that I lost. Other things seem to be details. The companionship that you get to hear from the everyday, going to the grocery store and cooking a nice dinner for her and making a surprise. Buying her favorite wine. Locking eyes and looking at each other a blank stare. able to hold hands and walk into the park and just smile and hugging her so hard that our heart beats are nsync She said "I felt that there was no more growth in our relationship... ;( that everything that was supposed to be done it was done ;( " after 2 lifethreatening emergency room encounters from her (one from alcohol poisioning, and dui related car crash) I thought I was the world for her. I now know that if a bond that was so strong like that can come to an end, anything can be broken as well. Link to comment
LFG Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 All - What part of your ex are you missing? The part that gave you puppy love, that was romantic, nice, tender, considerate OR the part that rejected you, broke your heart, left you for whatever reason, didn't love you the way you deserve to be loved? Please answer. Which part are you missing? Let me tell you something - the two parts are the SAME person. Don't split your ex and focus only on the part that your heart wants to focus on. You cannot separate the two parts. You must have the whole package and, unfortunately, the whole package SUCKS simply because the whole package doesn't want to be with you. Sorry for the tough love, but I've come far along the process to know the tricks that our mind play to ourselves. LFG Link to comment
Ashsun87 Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 "Sorry for the tough love, but I've come far along the process to know the tricks that our mind play to ourselves." Yeah, and I know where that place is. I've been there before. I'm just not there yet after my newest relationship. I miss all the good times, sure, and obviously I don't miss the bad times. I know she's toxic for me yet I still miss her. It's really that simple... I don't want her back, I don't even want to talk to her, I just miss her. It feels good to say that for some reason. Link to comment
Nearwater Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 All - What part of your ex are you missing? The part that gave you puppy love, that was romantic, nice, tender, considerate OR the part that rejected you, broke your heart, left you for whatever reason, didn't love you the way you deserve to be loved? Please answer. Which part are you missing? Let me tell you something - the two parts are the SAME person. Don't split your ex and focus only on the part that your heart wants to focus on. You cannot separate the two parts. You must have the whole package and, unfortunately, the whole package SUCKS simply because the whole package doesn't want to be with you. Sorry for the tough love, but I've come far along the process to know the tricks that our mind play to ourselves. LFG Good post- I am guilty of missing the fake crap she handed me for the last 6 months of our relationship, before she ran off. It was all projecting our future plans and crap about how lucky/happy/satisfied she was. i miss the good and hate her for the rest. Link to comment
saltandvinegar Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 All - What part of your ex are you missing? The part that gave you puppy love, that was romantic, nice, tender, considerate OR the part that rejected you, broke your heart, left you for whatever reason, didn't love you the way you deserve to be loved? Please answer. Which part are you missing? Let me tell you something - the two parts are the SAME person. Don't split your ex and focus only on the part that your heart wants to focus on. You cannot separate the two parts. You must have the whole package and, unfortunately, the whole package SUCKS simply because the whole package doesn't want to be with you. Sorry for the tough love, but I've come far along the process to know the tricks that our mind play to ourselves. LFG Very interesting point, because after a break up the person IS those two parts Link to comment
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