yeawutever Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 To everyone on here, just wondering if you were to break up with your SO who would you tell or would you just shut down??? For me besides this online long time British guy friend of now almost 3 years and this ENO forum, I got nowhere to go. My parents, NO WAY, that will only make them hate him even MORE (besides them overly trashing him, I would get no real help at all). Real life friends, no I'm not very good verbally, sometimes I don't talk that much. Other family member, not really, I kinda like privacy, don't like the whole gossiping thing (''Oh me and him had this and this, how could him, blah, blah, no use for that''). Other than ENO, Loveshack forums and my online guy friend, I would just keep writing. I get the feeling I can write more than actually talk in real life. Link to comment
Seymore Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 I usually talk to my parents or friends. My friends are usually unbiased and so is my father, but they'll usually tell me if I was wrong or if my ex was wrong. My mother is emotional, so if I say negative things that have been going on, she'll usually hate my ex more, but she still stays polite. If I had a problem while I was with her, no matter how big, my friends and family were still always friendly to her because they all realize it's my own business. They always console me and offer good advice, though. I don't get it though - why would it matter if they hate your ex even more AFTER you broke up? If it's over, what does it matter? Link to comment
yeawutever Posted January 3, 2009 Author Share Posted January 3, 2009 I tell my parents and they help, they stay unbiased for the most part and help me see the reality of things. Good thing unlike their position of always being one sided, no matter who were to dump who, to them he'll always be the bad guy. Same BS, yet they don't know how their overly persistent disapproval and struggle with this is affecting me. I don't get it though - why would it matter if they hate your ex even more AFTER you broke up? If it's over, what does it matter? Yea, I don't get that part either. I guess for them I am their lovely princess, since I am the only girl child. The only sibling I have is my little brother. Plus other than him, I never had any experience whatsoever so for them to know I lost it to someone they don't like, well that expains it, esp. to a father that's protective of his so called ''little girl''. Link to comment
COtuner Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 That's why I joined ENA - there wasn't really anyone to talk to whom I felt would give a damn for the most part. My friends are guys - they just said, "I'm sorry. You'll find someone else, you're hot. He wasn't worth your time. Hey, did you see such and such won the game?" LOL Link to comment
heaven66 Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 To everyone on here, just wondering if you were to break up with your SO who would you tell or would you just shut down??? For me besides this online long time British guy friend of now almost 3 years and this ENO forum, I got nowhere to go. My parents, NO WAY, that will only make them hate him even MORE (besides them overly trashing him, I would get no real help at all). Real life friends, no I'm not very good verbally, sometimes I don't talk that much. Other family member, not really, I kinda like privacy, don't like the whole gossiping thing (''Oh me and him had this and this, how could him, blah, blah, no use for that''). Other than ENO, Loveshack forums and my online guy friend, I would just keep writing. I get the feeling I can write more than actually talk in real life. I would just tell my friend and you guys. Link to comment
hmdreamer7 Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 I tell my family, and I think no matter what they'll always show me support. But if I want to have a full on discussion about a breakup I actually feel more comfortable talking to close friends. Link to comment
tin_tin Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 That's why I joined ENA - there wasn't really anyone to talk to whom I felt would give a damn for the most part. My friends are guys - they just said, "I'm sorry. You'll find someone else, you're hot. He wasn't worth your time. Hey, did you see such and such won the game?" LOL hehe. Usually go to my female friends so i can talk it out properly. My sisters and mum. Link to comment
lana111 Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 well it differs from person to person. i wouldnt go out of my way to tell anyone but a few close friends. then i would let the rest find out with time. its sorta an odd thing to bring up ya know? but my ex... he told EVERYONE! when we broke up everyone he knew, knew that day and he told my friends/co workers when he randomly ran into them and even told my parents before i did. thats just me and that was just him... but i would def tell ENA! Link to comment
alli Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 I would probably wait a couple days, then tell my mom & no one else. Definitely not my sister & I don't have any close friends right now. Eventually I'd have to tell everyone else. Hopefully that will never happen! Link to comment
Joel Barish Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 I immediately told all my close female friends, and my dad. And most anyone else who would listen. But not my male friends... Link to comment
secretness87 Posted January 4, 2009 Share Posted January 4, 2009 To everyone on here, just wondering if you were to break up with your SO who would you tell or would you just shut down??? In terms of my most recent break up, the first person I told was one of my roommates, then I told another one of my roommates. They are also my closest friends. I also wrote down everything that happened in my journal... and then I proceeded on telling my parents the next day.. just a small snippet of it though, because I didn't want to tell them everything in detail. But yeah, mostly I just tell my most closest friends, my parents, and I write down everything in my journal. I really like writing in my journal though. One day when I'm happily married, I'm gonna look back on this and read it lol Link to comment
Hurting5050 Posted January 4, 2009 Share Posted January 4, 2009 I talked to my sister -- she is the only person in my life that I can be completely open with about everything. She never ever judges me -- she listens and also gives me tough love when needed -- and believe me, I needed it, lol. I also find that writing in my journal helps me to get all my feelings out -- it's very therapeutic. Link to comment
SighSob Posted January 4, 2009 Share Posted January 4, 2009 My friends, my parents and my sister have been helping me a lot... Link to comment
pumpkinmoon Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 If the person is anything like my ex, most people would already know before me. Link to comment
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