Dezzy Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 My ex broke it up with me for the second time 5 months ago because he saaid he wasn't inlove with me anymore. Recently on myspace I went to my hotmail account to add friends I may not have added and to my surprise my ex is registered on it (even though he said he hated it) and its blank(like he hasn't decorated it or put any info on it or have no friends) under a different name and age and its been registered since a month after we broke up. I noticed he has been recently on, so I decided to watch his profile to see if he was stalking me. Sure enough as soon as he logged in my profile views went up. I don't really have a problem with it and I do miss him and we had NC since a month after the break up. So why is he stalking me if he doesn't love me anymore? Not to mention he did this before when we broke up the first time, except it was on the myspace account I made for him before we broke up. Should I surprise him and say something? Link to comment
Wolf_22 Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 A counselor I once had told me that when he dated a lady back in college, he thought that she was cheating on him. Sure enough, he found out by sitting outside her apartment in his truck at night. When he told me this, he then asked me, "How do you think I felt when I saw that?" I would say, "Hurt?" After nodding his head, he would then explain to me that this same principle relates to why I need to try and stop watching my ex's MySpace, Facebook, login times, e-mail notices, websites, profiles, etc., etc... So I guess my point is that you need to try and disassociate yourself from your ex because it will only bring pain in all the assumptions and whatever else you find yourself gathering from it all. Link to comment
Nkaleidoscopic Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 Ignore it. This is why I hate facebook, myspace, all that. It should be that if someone wants to contact you, they will. No guessing around. Someone looking at your myspace doesn't imply that they love you. It doesn't mean anything. If he loved you he would man up and call or email. Link to comment
chocolates Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 agree facebook and myspace are evil and dangerous to anyone who has broken up, infact Anyone at all. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 Who knows why he is doing it...maybe he does still care, maybe he is just curious, who knows. It doesn't matter what his reasons are..the only thing that matters is that he broke up with you and has made no solid effort to contact you and get back together. Even if he does still love you, checking out your online activity is irrelevant if he makes no solid attempts to contact you for real and initiate reconciliation. Link to comment
PJPaul Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 Ehh I hate those sites after a break up. I just delete them as friends, put my profile of private, change my password just in case she had it. Problem solved If you find that you want to look at theirs. then you go through and delete every comment, message, blog comment, etc. so that you wont see there page. Out of sight out of mind. Has worked perfectly for me Link to comment
flash83 Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 im not sure if stalking is the right word ... he may just be curious to see how you are doing. im not sure how myspace or whatever works for the view counts but did you guys have mutual friends? perhaps he was just looking at some pics of your friends on your profile .. i know on facebook i look at my friend's pictures that was posted by someone else and i dont even realize it. Link to comment
Dezzy Posted January 3, 2009 Author Share Posted January 3, 2009 im not sure if stalking is the right word ... he may just be curious to see how you are doing. im not sure how myspace or whatever works for the view counts but did you guys have mutual friends? perhaps he was just looking at some pics of your friends on your profile .. i know on facebook i look at my friend's pictures that was posted by someone else and i dont even realize it. nope we dont have any mutual friends.they onlyway he can get to me is if he searched for me and bookmarked me after he found me. when he did this our first break up he saw I had a new guy friend and started crying to my friend and his sister about how much he loved me and missed me, and THEY came and asked me if i would consider getting back together with him, (we're 25!). So sadly my ex was kinda a wuss and you have to kinda build a bridge for him before he made any kind of move. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted January 3, 2009 Share Posted January 3, 2009 nope we dont have any mutual friends.they onlyway he can get to me is if he searched for me and bookmarked me after he found me. when he did this our first break up he saw I had a new guy friend and started crying to my friend and his sister about how much he loved me and missed me, and THEY came and asked me if i would consider getting back together with him, (we're 25!). So sadly my ex was kinda a wuss and you have to kinda build a bridge for him before he made any kind of move. Well, at a certain age they have to stand on their own two feet...even if he is interested, if he doesn't have the b**ls to do anything and needs someone to walk him through it then what is the point. You can only spoon feed someone for so long...they have to stop being a coward and if they can't then relationship cowards do not make good long-term partners. Link to comment
Dezzy Posted January 5, 2009 Author Share Posted January 5, 2009 ok so I ran into him today and we asked how each other has been, but I didnt mention anything about the webpage viewing. When we first saw each other we kinda hid (he was accross the street and I was in my car, my quick reaction was to dunk but I got out and started to play it off and turned away as if I didnt see him, then he looked at me and when he saw I was looking he quickly turned away like he wasn't looking) so I decided to make the first move and wave and he came over and started talking. It was weird I just felt this warm feeling come over me once we were faced to face. So what do I do now? Do I break NC or continue it? Link to comment
Adge Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 Do you love him? Is there a chance you can perhaps reconnect? Why not try and talk to him? All this avoidance will get you nowhere! Link to comment
Dezzy Posted January 6, 2009 Author Share Posted January 6, 2009 Do you love him? Is there a chance you can perhaps reconnect? Why not try and talk to him? All this avoidance will get you nowhere! i'll admit I do love him, but I would like for him to show how much I mean to him too. I do it all the time, I'm always the one trying to stop the aurguements and make things work but he always pushes me away. I want to see for once my worth time without his ride getting in the way Link to comment
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