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I don't know if i still love her


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Alright

Well, im a 18 year old guy, who i never was social at all, really then i met this girl and she turned me into a social guy, gave me confidence. We went out for over a year and i fell in love with her so fast. She accepted me for me, understood me, then i felt as if i lost interest when all of a sudden i had all this other attention from other girls, i almost lost attractiveness of her, and even the thought that she cared about me. eventually we broke up i moved on the next day, not even thinking about it asecond time.

 

Now iv been going out with a new girl for about a month and a half, and just now i was talking to my ex for a bit, and i just thought of the stuff i put her through how she always stuck by my side, and how the last things she said was, None of the people i hang out with now, like me for who i am. None of love every bit of me, even before when i wasnt as social etc.

 

And i cryed for the first time since we broke up, and i just cant stop thinking of memories with her, me having fun with her. How close me and her became within days, the friendship i made with her in the short amount of time, i felt amazing. And now iv been going out a month and a half and im as close as i was with my ex, after a few days.

 

I don't know if i still love her. Im not nearly as physically attracted to her and i am with my current but just. I miss her so much. And i feel so bad, i just realised how much of an * * * * * * * i had turned into

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I would say you probably do love her, but you are not in-love with her. However, I must say that these types of feelings about someone (the loving her part) are often the kind that can last a lifetime. Physical attraction will diminish over time - I mean you are not going to be physically attracted to your wife when she is 80 and wrinkled up. You may be sexually attracted to her (ack) but that's only because of the deep emotional bond you will share after having been with each other for such a long time.

 

I think you should definitely keep this girl in your life, as long as it's not hurting her (which is going to be hard to figure out). I mean, you are young so you probably don't know yourself well enough yet to settle down with someone. But just put in the back of your mind that THAT is the type of person you should settle down with eventually. Someone who cares about you for who you are, and someone you feel deeply emotional about, not necessarily a chick that just gets your **** hard. Cause I promise you brother, there will always be a hotter girl out there!

 

I think it's great that you have found yourself socially, too. But don't be a * * * * * about it. It's never a good idea to lose who you really are, especially if who you were in the first place attracted someone like her.

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well, it sounds like you have to make a decision. And it sounds even more like you don't want to let go of the girl you're with. So, in reality, it sounds like you've made your decision, and you feel bad about the other girl. In other words, if you were to get back with her, I think it's possible that you would be doing it just because you feel like you owe it to her. And that's not a good reason to be in a relationship.

 

If you feel like you owe her something, remain friends with her and actually be a good friend. Like actually go out of your way to do cool stuff for her to make her feel good and let her know how grateful you are to her for what she gave you. Who knows, maybe you will develop deeper feelings for her than you have for your current girl, or maybe not. But at least you did some cool stuff for someone who helped you out before.

 

what goes around definitely comes around.

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