shemo Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Hey everybody. I don't know how many of you are familiar with my story. I didn't join here too long ago. But anyways, my boyfriend broke up with me on NYE. It just wasn't working anymore. We were together for 2 years. We were once so happy together, hardly ever had any problems, just had a great relationship. But he broke my trust 4 months ago and things haven't been the same since. We always argued because I was feeling insecure and I felt that he wasn't putting effort into earning my trust back. This time is for sure, not one of those wishy washy going on a break kind of situations. He made up his mind that this is the end and there's no turning back. Everyone that knows me knows that I am very obssessive and I have a hard time finding closure. But I did something good for myself yesterday. We were on a family plan for our cell phones and I told him that I have to cut his phone line not for any malicious reasons, but for my own sake, I can not have his phone number because I will try to contact him and I will never heal. I said he needs to start a new line, new number - a new number that I will never know. He said he understood. All my friends were so proud of me.. they didn't think I would do that because they know I like to check the phone log to see what he's up to... but I know it's not healthy and even though I was regretting doing it even when I was on the phone with customer service... I did it. It's only been one day and I'm miserable... He's been my best friend for 2 years. I talked to him everyday and now I feel alone and scared. I just need people to talk to and keep my mind preoccupied. Thanks everyone. Link to comment
gr8tfriend Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 My heart goes out to you, you are not alone. Link to comment
gromalamaz Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Kudos to you -- that was a great step to take! I've found that writing helps me vent some of the feelings I'm experiencing. I was with my ex for over a year and he was the person I talked to every day -- it's difficult to transition from that (especially since we lived together and came home to eachother each night). Call your friends to share your day. It will get easier with time... Link to comment
franfran Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Hi shemo... I'm sorry for what you are going through. You are braving through the situation and taking control of things, which is incredibly admirable. You're not calling him at all hours of the night or sending him helpless emails, you're moving on, on your own. I think that is the hardest thing to do, to find closure and move on without the person you are so used to having in your life all the time... your best friend. I am so sorry. My best friend/boyfriend broke up with me in October and it has been a long, hard road, but NC has helped me heal. I've been able to look at the relationship in a different light. You will have the chance to do this too...until then, we are all here for you and encourage you to talk to us about what's going on Link to comment
and again Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 It is hard now on day 3 of nc, prob best if she didnt contact me, because she`s now run off twice, once because she cudnt get her head around how strong her feelings were, then got back together 3 wks ago and all she did was talk of future and how much she loved me, and was so sorry for hurting me last time, then after one slight diagrement, not even a row she said she couldnt do with the * * * * of a relationship. But she hadnt had any it was perfect, and if any one was having * * * * it was me, putting up with her being fed up with everyone around her, and talking her problems through. Which i was happy to do. I fell head over heels for her again and guess what ? She did it again. So im prob best trying to get through it with nc. Good luck to you. Link to comment
shemo Posted January 2, 2009 Author Share Posted January 2, 2009 It's just so hard because he was my first love. He meant more to me than anyone I've ever dated and the relationship got very serious. We almost moved into my parents' house together... thank god that didn't happen. I'm miserable because it's just so easy for him to turn off his feelings and pretend that none of this matters and he'll just go on with his day as if nothing happened. Whereas I'm a very emotional person that wears my heart on my sleeve. When I'm sad or stressed, it's visible and I can't focus on anything else but that. Link to comment
and again Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 yeah know what u mean, i were my heart on my sleave and what i say i mean. Only monday we were talking of having a little one, and how we would never split and would always talk stuff through, then one fall out and she`s like i cant be doing wth all this * * * * . Got to admit knocked me off my feet Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.