Self Help Book Questions

[twrtwn]

am really trying to work on some issues I find have caused problems in some of my relationships. If anyone knows of some good books on these subjects, please throw the titles to me. I surely have enough time on my hands now to maybe make some life changes if possible.

I know I have problems with loneliness. I don't know about all of you but no matter how busy I keep myself, I never feel my best unless I am in a good relationship. Alone I don't feel good. I have lots of friends (but most are married - so not available all that much). I spend plenty of alone time and can always keep myself busy and don't mind it unless I am really out of a relationship. Feels like I'm just going through the motions.

I also tend to overlook my needs in a relationship just to keep the peace or to prolong a bad relationship just so as not to be alone.

I attract the men who have committment issues. I usually find this out once I am too deep into it (my heart is invested - there's aren't). I ignore the red flags and warning signs - again, hoping for a permanent reltionship. Don't like being alone - so much so I stay in unhealthy relationships.

Anyone have any good reads on these subjects?

[Anusha]

Hi I would sugest you Women that Loves too much from Robin Norwood and How to break your addiction to a person from Howard Halpern.They will let you know why you tend to wants a relationship and stay in bad ones.I hope it helps and good look on your self improvement

[catfeeder]

You can google Dr. Joy Browne for some excellent podcasts of her radio show (caution--addicting) and she's written a ton of books.

 

Her approach is one of problem solving rather than therapies that amount to navel gazing. She's not about moralistic finger-wagging with 'shoulds' and 'should nots' but rather, she helps you pinpoint what, exactly, you want--beyond complaining. Then she helps you get there.

 

For instance, say your goal is to stay in a relationship that others would harshly judge as 'wrong' for you, she'll teach you how to ID problems or attitudes that could be dealbreakers--then how to negotiate solutions for those.

 

She also talks her listeners and readers out of self-pity, which sabotages every relationship and doesn't solve anything. I like that, because I left the victim thing behind years ago. If you're on board with that, you just might love her.

 

Hope this helps!

[twrtwn]

You can google Dr. Joy Browne for some excellent podcasts of her radio show (caution--addicting) and she's written a ton of books.

 

Her approach is one of problem solving rather than therapies that amount to navel gazing. She's not about moralistic finger-wagging with 'shoulds' and 'should nots' but rather, she helps you pinpoint what, exactly, you want--beyond complaining. Then she helps you get there.

 

For instance, say your goal is to stay in a relationship that others would harshly judge as 'wrong' for you, she'll teach you how to ID problems or attitudes that could be dealbreakers--then how to negotiate solutions for those.

 

She also talks her listeners and readers out of self-pity, which sabotages every relationship and doesn't solve anything. I like that, because I left the victim thing behind years ago. If you're on board with that, you just might love her.

 

Hope this helps!

 

Thanks. Sounds interesting. I'll check it out!