Adolescent insecurities into adulthood?

[Lusif]

I'm looking for advice from anyone here, but those who are past adolescence are particularly welcome!

 

Think back to your insecurities as a teenager. Do they still exist now? Did you completely change that aspect of yourself, or did you simply grow out of the insecurity and accept yourself?

 

And have any of you experienced that something that genuinely changed you, majorly? What was it?

 

I'm 19 and sometimes I feel as if I'll be riddled with certain insecurities for all time, yet I still wait and hope for a day where I won't feel like this. Has anybody any advice about this? What would you go back and change, or what worked?

[waveseer]

If I could go back I would lose all of my perfectionist tendencies and realize just how hot I really was! I don't worry about it so much any more, nobody's perfect.

[wtm78]

insecurities are nothing to be ashame about.. in every stage of life there are different insecurities that will challenge..they are not here to crush you.. but they can destroy you if you let them.. they are here so you can learn how to overcome them to be stronger.. to be more confident.. having that confident resting on the shoulders of faith will you overcome such fears... it is ok to be afraid... but dont let fear grips you.. instead face your fears and insecurities and see that they are nothing but what that is self inflicted... that is a journey to self discovery.. good luck in your journey...

[nutbrownhare]

For me, adolescence was pure nightmare! Some of the horrors just faded away by themselves, and others were dissipated in therapy.

 

However, I do recall my shrink telling me that the strongest, most empathetic people tend to be those who, as he put it 'have been through the fire as teenagers'.

 

My advice to you would be just to experience everything that appeals to you, don't give yourself a hard time about things that don't work out - this is all valuable experience - and know that there will be good days and bad days. Both will pass.

 

(Mind you, I WOULD quite like to go back to looking the way I did then, but knowing what I know now! Youth is wasted on the young!)

[COtuner]

A couple of my insecurities are still around, although they have evolved with time and experience.

 

1. Not very good socializing with other women - leftover from always being the new girl at school and going through hell because of it. Little did I know then that it was because I was a threat to them, cute and smart and something different to the guys. I took it as "girls hate me, I'm not pretty enough". It has evolved into just being uncomfortable chatting with other women because I feel I lost out on the opportunity to share anything in common with them.

 

2. Self-confidence. My parents were perfectionists when it came to me - they turned me into a Type A perfectionist which is my hang up now. However, it evolved from a childhood feeling of never being good enough and simply losing interest. When I suddenly regained interest around the age of 22, it was gung ho be the best at everything, and I'm still stuck in that mode 16 years later.

 

So yeah, they can last. I think as long as you're aware of them and don't let them take control, you'll be ok. It's when you give them power over you by not facing up to them or working on them, that they can really become a lifelong issue (my opinion based on my own experience)

[Casey13]

I think most adolescent/ childhood insecurities fade over time but 19 is still a relatively young age, mine faded in mid-twenties or so. Give it some more time. As you mature through your twienties they should go.

[Lusif]

Interesting! So the general consensus is that they DO fade over time.

 

Any more opinions?