Empty. Low.

[sarey]

I feel so empty and hollow. So low. I see no point in the future. We die anyway. What's the point?!

 

I'm ill right now so that doesn't at all help. I'm full of worry, full of anxiety, in pain, hate this all so much.

 

*sigh*

[Jeen]

Hi sarey

 

Darling can you speak to your mom or any one at this stage, if you feel bad you should tell them. Why are you worrying, can you put your finger on it or is it life in general.

[sarey]

My close friend is in hospital, she overdosed, I'm so worried, she could die. shes not doing well at all...

I'm worried because I'm ill and no clue what's going on with my body

I'm worried because I don't know what to do anymore and what's happening and I feel so weird and distant and out of it

and my mum... no... she's got enough on her plate.

 

 

 

I see a doctor tomorrow regarding my physical health

I just feel so weird and odd and just empty. depressed. *shrug*

[Jeen]

Sarey

 

Can you lite a candle for your friend, and ask God to help her and her family in this time. Sarey have you ever heard of "holiday blues" or when you were really busy and every thing slow down and you find time to reflect on life, it sometimes has this effect on the mind where we get depressed, where we look back and find it hard to relate to the things that happen in the last few weeks and day's "We just feel empty" it is normal to feel this way and the only way to beat this feeling is to find something els to do.

 

Play a game read a book or fold something with a piece of paper. "Or surf the internet"

 

I hope everything go's well when you see the doctor tomorrow.

 

Big hugs

[sarey]

I spent my Xmas evening in hospital and the next few days too, I was ill over Xmas so I didn't really do much.

 

I don't think I have candles in the house, my mum hates them, an old friend of ours died because she left her candle lit and she took sleeping tablets that night & she died in a house fire. ;(

 

I am texting her and seeing how she is, her last one said

"Not good i fainted & my bp keeps dropping. my liver function is borderline abnormal, so i have to stay in & maybe have another 3 drips. I find out tomorow Love you x"

 

 

[IndigoEye]

Hi Sarey,

 

Was wondering, do you get heart palpitations when you have anxiety...when lying down to sleep? I get that and just figured out a remedy that's working really well.

 

I used to feel pretty bad myself. Not drastic, but bad enough. I was clueless in life. Then I got ill. Have been for ten years now. Best thing that ever happened to me. Extremely tough, but the quickest rout to where I needed to go. Have been very isolated the whole time but these have been the most productive years of my life. I've gained more knowledge, wisdom, understanding of life, and confidence in this time than ever before.

 

Jean is right. Find something to do. I used my talents to do what I really wanted to do in life even though I wasn't getting paid for it. Now, if I can get healthy, I have some interesting things to capitalize on. It helps people, I love doing it, and I'll make a living at it. It's perfect. What's you're idea of perfect for your time here? Set a goal and make a plan for it.

 

What are you good at? What do you like doing? Mix the two and do what little you can with it. It will grow. Point being, distract yourself from the pain by being constructive, if possible; but, when you're really ill, take care of that first. You can help someone while you're here and help yourself in the process. That's the point. I think that's why we're here, to answer your question.

 

Just my thoughts. Don't know what you worry about per se, so if this is off target maybe something here helps and you can tweak it to better fit your situation.

 

Hope your doc visit goes well.

[Jeen]

Owh! Sarey

 

Are there a way you can have a late Xmas by yourself, can you maybe make your room into your own little "Christmas den" for tonight. Can you find a way to try and forget the rest of the world for a few hours till you can fall asleep.

 

Sarey if she can still speak to you, it do not sound that bad, she may have permanent liver damage or end up with diabetes, but I do think she will survive.

[sarey]

My heart right now, the rate is quite slow and normal, which is odd. It has been very racey this past week though, it's finally calmed down and resting.

 

I really see no point in being alive

What's worse is I am so scared of dying

it's the unknown

but I don't want to be here.

 

*looks around* sort of stuck.

 

I have OCD and anxiety, so I worry about alot of things, both physical health and emotionally...

 

you're on the right track, don't worry. i appreicate your posting. both of you.

[sarey]

Owh! Sarey

 

Are there a way you can have a late Xmas by yourself, can you maybe make your room into your own little "Christmas den" for tonight. Can you find a way to try and forget the rest of the world for a few hours till you can fall asleep.

 

Sarey if she can still speak to you, it do not sound that bad, she may have permanent liver damage or end up with diabetes, but I do think she will survive.

 

the thing is, she has bulimia,severe bulimia, she abuses laxatives, 70 a day, purges 60 times a day, jjust... shes a mess. shes really going to die if she carires on. and she has taken 25 paracetamol,in her condiiton thats fatal

i just hope she is ok i love her so much she cant go..

 

meh im still quite ill i cant rely do much

i jsut want to ... well. i dont know,

[Jeen]

the thing is, she has bulimia,severe bulimia, she abuses laxatives, 70 a day, purges 60 times a day, jjust... shes a mess. shes really going to die if she carires on. and she has taken 25 paracetamol,in her condiiton thats fatal

i just hope she is ok i love her so much she cant go..

 

meh im still quite ill i cant rely do much

i jsut want to ... well. i dont know,

 

Why don't you take some time and write here a letter, telling her how you feel about her. Sometimes we need something to hold on to, when we are down in life, to give us that little hope it will all workout in the end and there is still someone who love and care what happen to us in life. A letter she can read when she feels down and alone, something she can use to draw power from.

[sarey]

I don't know the hospital address she's at, all I can do is text her... I know her home address though but she won't get it...

 

I will keep texting her but I'm so scared I'll lose her.

[Jeen]

I don't know the hospital address she's at, all I can do is text her... I know her home address though but she won't get it...

 

I will keep texting her but I'm so scared I'll lose her.

 

Sarey

 

What I'm talking about is not a letter for just now but something she can read every time she feel down in life, something she can hold when she is sad or want to end her life, something telling her why it would be a bad decision for her to go this way, something to let her know how special she is to you in life. Something to make her see there is more to live for.