The final key of pick-up - direct game

[Imprecision]

Previously, I advocated indirect game, e.g. opinion openers. I would sit down with a girl at a coffee-shop, talk with her for half an hour, and then get her phone number.

 

David Deangelo said in one of his books that he could usually get a number in less than three minutes. At the time - based on my experience at the time - I thought that was unrealistic for daygame.

 

Lately, I began using direct openers. E.g. "Hey there! This might be a bit unusual for you. But I think your clothes are stylish. I felt compelled to compliment you."

 

Using direct openers, I have indeed been able to number close within three minutes regularly.

 

Once, I met a guy who worked with a local Vancouver pick-up company. He told me that, after merely three months with the company, he was having threesomes all the time. (Personally, I'm not into threesomes. I'm boring and traditional when it comes to sex. However, I respected his game.)

 

Biweekly threesomes within three months? I was incredulous at the time. I thought he was advertising for the company. Now, however, I think I know how they do it. They teach direct game from the get-go. This speeds up the learning curve.

 

I find that women often respond to direct openers better than indirect openers. They are surprised by your confidence.

 

With indirect openers, an inexperienced beginner sometimes comes off as creepy. This is because he necessarily prolongs an interaction without declaring his intention. Women don't know how to deal with that. When you declare your intention openly, women are comfortable.

 

Furthermore, approach anxiety is much lower using direct openers. This is because you don't have to think about what you have to say.

 

Despite the advantages of direct openers, indirect openers are still useful. This is because there are many situations where direct openers are inappropriate. At other times, you want to test the water with a situational opener.

 

The best part of the direct opener is seeing a girl from afar, e.g. accross the street, walking away from you. Stricken by her intense beauty, you run after her over several blocks to speak with her.

 

Another good part - previously, I had difficulty opening Mandarin-speaking women. They don't respond well to indirect openers - in my experience, at least (I have friends who use indirect openers with them). They are confused by it. Often, they don't understand English, anyway. However, they respond to direct openers well, because your intention is so clear.

 

Now, I feel that a beginner should try both approaches - indirect and direct. They complement each other in the learning process. Without direct game, however, a young man's education remains incomplete.

 

The direct-game process

 

You: "Hey there! This might be a bit unusual for you. But I think your clothes are stylish. I felt compelled to compliment you."

Girl: "Thanks!"

You: "You aren't from Vancouver, are you?"

Girl: "No, I'm from..."

 

And then you're a normal conversation. You can ask superficial details about school, work, etc. Ask her what she does for fun, too. When you leave, ask for email first, before the phone number.

 

Any views?

[laisla]

i would agree that direct openers work pretty well. on me at least. if i'm not interested i'll just laugh and say "no" then keep walking. no matter what, a girl has to be attracted in some way to give out her number.

[COtuner]

Well, I personally wouldn't give a guy my phone number who compliments me at random on the street. Nor would I share much personal information.

[hmdreamer7]

I'm all for directness and confidence. I've never been asked for my email out though, have you actually gotten someone's email instead of a phone number?

[Imprecision]

hmdreamer7

 

I'm all for directness and confidence. I've never been asked for my email out though, have you actually gotten someone's email instead of a phone number?

 

I used to get phone numbers instead of emails. However, I now prefer emails, because women respond to emails better. With phone numbers, you might call twice and receive the answering machine both times. With email, you will write something, and then she'll write something, and then you'll write something again, etc.

 

There's less pressure on women with emails, because they can take their time to write the best reply. Also, maybe they didn't want to reply at first, but then they change their mind later.

 

I find that a girl who's reluctant to give you her number is often willing to give you her email. The best way, I think, is to ask for the email first, and then the number immediately after the email.

 

And yes, I have gotten emails in absense of phone numbers before, and ended up on dates with these girls.

[hmdreamer7]

There's less pressure on women with emails, because they can take their time to write the best reply.

 

Totally agree with that. Guys in my area need to start askin' me for my email!!

[thejigsup]

I'm going to show my age here, but I think a guy has to EARN any personal info I give him. If a guy came up to me with your approach I would be either insulted or scared. Either way, he'd strike out. A guy gets my attention and phone number in a different way. He has to compliment me, show me his intelligence, and really get to know me before it goes beyond casual aquaintance. I met my bf through online dating and we emailed back and for the for quite a while before we actually talked over the phone. I screen gentlemen friends closely and seldom find a bad one. It happens, but much less often than it happens to impulsive people.

[nutbrownhare]

Like thejigsup, I wouldn't be giving out my personal information to someone who approached me in the way you describe. In fact, reading through your original post I was wondering if anyone actually fell for this ****! Evidently they do! Maybe it's because both she and I have been round the block a couple of times, and it's age and experience speaking here ...

[Imprecision]

Like thejigsup, I wouldn't be giving out my personal information to someone who approached me in the way you describe. In fact, reading through your original post I was wondering if anyone actually fell for this ****! Evidently they do! Maybe it's because both she and I have been round the block a couple of times, and it's age and experience speaking here ...

 

Lol...I do like older girls. Fortunately, anyone born in the 50s is too old for me.

[nutbrownhare]

Lol...I do like older girls. Fortunately, anyone born in the 50s is too old for me.

 

Even if they look much younger?

[heloladies21]

Well this is a really important issue for you yourself to push the envelope on. I've read your previous threads and I'd say one consistent stumbling block for you is being direct ie. escalating, giving an SOI (statement of interest for those who don't know),showing your true emotions even when they're negative (confrontation, jealousy). This is one of the reasons "jerks" get so many girls, it's because they're so ultra direct that it encompases her in the moment.

 

So keep being direct, even past the opener. You need to swing more towards that side.

[Imprecision]

Well this is a really important issue for you yourself to push the envelope on. I've read your previous threads and I'd say one consistent stumbling block for you is being direct ie. escalating, giving an SOI (statement of interest for those who don't know),showing your true emotions even when they're negative (confrontation, jealousy). This is one of the reasons "jerks" get so many girls, it's because they're so ultra direct that it encompases her in the moment.

 

So keep being direct, even past the opener. You need to swing more towards that side.

 

You're probably right. I feel that just by switching to direct openers, I've made tremendous progress in the past few days. I'll definitely take your advice and swing toward that side.

 

Btw, is it really possible to intuit about people that accurately over the internet? I'm kinda impressed.

[heloladies21]

Thanks for the compliment , I have been doing this for quite some time though. As I said before I enjoy our discussions and learn a lot from your posts as well. You're on your way to becoming a really good pick up artist.

 

You do some very excellent things, your persistence, always critically analyzing the feedback you get. This is all a recipe for success. But we talked before about that aggression I want to see come out of you more. I feel like as you do that you'll start to see the hurdles that have held you back will fold right quick.

[hmm1]

I find this whole "game" business to be kind of disgusting. I'm not trying to offend you personally or anything, but I just feel like it's pretty degrading to women. Evidently this doesn't score me any points with women since you're having threesomes and I'm a lonely virgin, but hey, I guess life sucks when you're given a moral upbringing.

[jenny_mcs]

I find this whole "game" business to be kind of disgusting. I'm not trying to offend you personally or anything, but I just feel like it's pretty degrading to women. Evidently this doesn't score me any points with women since you're having threesomes and I'm a lonely virgin, but hey, .

 

Well, I am a woman and I don't really see how trying to get a gal's number or ask her out on a date, etc., is degrading to women.

 

And by saying "I guess life sucks when you're given a moral upbringing"... you seem to be implying that the guys who are going out and trying to meet girls and discussing strategies, exchanging tips, etc. are "immoral"- which I don't think is true.

 

These so-called "pick up artist" techniques certainly won't all work for everyone (I find a lot of things they say/do kind of cheesy myself), but there's nothing morally wrong, imo, with them.

[rbr85]

I am by no means a dating guru, but what has always worked for me in the past is to drop the ridiculous lines, make fun of them a bit, be a little cocky, but be open and flirtatious with your body language. Make them feel like you're sizing them up while treating them as your equal.

[Nutz]

Direct is great for day-game, but I wouldn't hold it as the holy grail of pickup. Direct and Indirect are both great, but they both have their time & place.

[Nutz]

hmdreamer7

The best way, I think, is to ask for the email first, and then the number immediately after the email.

 

Classic "yes escalation" at work.

[Nutz]

I am by no means a dating guru, but what has always worked for me in the past is to drop the ridiculous lines, make fun of them a bit, be a little cocky, but be open and flirtatious with your body language. Make them feel like you're sizing them up while treating them as your equal.

 

In other words Cocky Funny and be a challenge, both of which are two highly regarded tenets of pickup.

[rbr85]

In other words Cocky Funny and be a challenge, both of which are two highly regarded tenets of pickup.

 

Cha-ching!

[Shudder]

getting a girl's number isnt a science people..