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MAJORD23 WROTE:

 

 

What is No Contact?

 

While a seemingly simple question, there are variations of what ‘No Contact’ can mean.

 

1) You tell your ex that you won’t be contacting them and that they shouldn’t contact you.

2) You don’t tell your ex anything, and just drop off the face of the Earth.

3) You don’t tell your ex anything, you stop contacting them…but still allow them to contact you and you reply. (potentially damaging)

 

In my opinion, the most effective forms of NC are 1 and 2. They allow you to heal, as the ex isn’t given any way of providing you with hope (bait) or potentially emotionally damaging information (who wants to hear how great their life is without you?)

 

When starting NC, it is up to you what you want to say to your ex. Most people seem to say something along the lines of “Don’t call me unless you change your mind and want to give us another try”. It might also help to let them know that the window of opportunity to reconcile (from your perspective) will not be open forever.

 

You also may want to tell the ex why your cutting them out of your life – tell them it is so you can heal and move on. And in reality that IS why you’re doing it……

 

 

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How does this work with the LDR?? If you think one day it could possibly work??

Im doing the NC now, but if he does call/write/text, should I not respond if he does appologize?? Or even if he initiates 'small talk'??

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1) You tell your ex that you won’t be contacting them and that they shouldn’t contact you.

 

This is fine unless you contact them to tell them you won't contact them. That's just an excuse to contact them.

 

2) You don’t tell your ex anything, and just drop off the face of the Earth.

 

Bingo!

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