Need Advice Please

[thlocke]

Thanks to anyone who can help, here's the story.

 

I was assigned to a project for 7 days where a group of 4 us would be working 10 plus hours a day at the library. Well luckily this girl who I can't stop thinking about was assigned to my group. From the first day I knew there was something different about her and it was more than just being physically attractive to her, I never felt as happy as I did when I was with her.

 

It wasn't love at first sight. It happened slowly. Around the second or third day we began to connect and get along great, talking about all sorts of things and putting in extra hours together when we could have gone home. She began touching me a lot and hitting me when I made jokes about her and we would always make each other laugh.

 

I knew she was interested in me, at least I thought she was, when she offered to give me a ride home and began texting me at night after we worked together. It was great.

 

On the final night of the project I offered that we go get something to eat. She offered to drive and we went to a place and I payed. She drove me home and I said I would see her tomorrow. This is where things got interesting...

 

When she got back home she texted me again and I promised myself I wouldn't let her get away so I just told her I how I felt and that I couldn't stop thinking about her. She responded that she didn't want to talk about it and she is independent. She said her friend was rooting for me and we just had to take and slow and she wanted to see where it went.

 

I said that was fine and offered that we get something to eat before we both went back home for christmas. She said she was up for the idea and on the day of I suggested a place that I guess she thought was too much of a date place, because she said she wanted to go somewhere normal. I told her anywhere was fine for me. She then said she didn't have enough time because she had to take care of a few things and wanted to know if I just wanted to come and hang out there. I said sure. However, later she said she would be too busy and it would be better just to hang out after break.

 

So here I am now having to wait over 3 weeks to see her again. We have only texted a few times and it usually stops by her not responding. I really like this girl and I'm trying not to come on too strong, but I can't control how I feel about her.

 

So my question is, is it normal for a girl to want to be friends first and wait and see how it goes? Is she really interesting in me or is just trying to be nice to avoid hurting me? I'm so confused! I'll try to answer any of your questions and any help and advice would be great.

[Sn0man]

Hi thlocke, and welcome to ENA!

 

Maybe you're being too forward. A casual approach is always your best bet, no matter how much you like this person. Being too eager is usually a warning sign for women.

 

Just be casual. And go easy on the texting.

[Phaser]

You may have scared her a bit when you revealed all your feelings.

[Casey13]

Okay last thing you want is for her to feel a little too pushed or boxed in. Give her a little space and wait out the three weeks. Even if she is really interested in you but feels that you are being a little too pushy she might just cut the ties. Just relax a little and let it be and see how things play out.

[Ariel85]

You freaked her out.

 

Do NOT contact her again. If she's interested, she'll reach out.

 

In the future, know that an early declaration like that reeks of desperation, and is a huge turnoff for most people. Play a little hard to get!

[thlocke]

okay I took your advice and I won't contact her again.

 

Time to just wait and see.

[LonelyPast]

Man... I wouldn't know what to do either! As I was reading I was thinking you could have been spontaneously romantic and kissed her at the door to let her know you were interested instead of texting about your feelings afterwords. After reading the responses it became apparent that you'd probably just get slapped for that, lol. Apparently my head is filled with too many romantic notions and not enough experience!

 

I do know from experience that it's hard not to act desperate when you pretty much are. Waiting can be hard since it makes your mind run in circles. Be strong, and try to find things to do so you don't drive yourself insane by idly thinking about her all the time!

[thlocke]

Well I took your advice and didnt contact her for a few days. Last night she messaged me and wished me a happy new year.

 

I sent her a message back, but was kind of busy and a little drunk and didn't get a response until like 20min later. So either she was busy too or who knows. Like always though I left the last message after a few more responses so now once again I'm the one who is always left wondering. I hate text messages....

 

So what should I do now? Should I still wait for her to message me again? I don't want to be an ass and seem like im ignoring her but I also dont want to come on too strong again? Thanks for the help.