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girlfriend doesnt call on vacation

jlove89

By jlove89
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jlove89 Apprentice

jlove89

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my girlfriend went to another country to visit family for christmas she will be gone for 11 days......she never called me when she got there just sent me a short email 10 hours later saying shes safe and she got there and wishing me a merry christmas.....so i emailed her back and was just telling her i love her and miss her and things ......and the next day i get another short email just saying its raining here and ill cya soon!.

 

is it me or is she being cold cuz she doesnt say she misses me or anything and doesnt even call??? im a little disappointed but i dont know if im overreacting...

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franfran Explorer

franfran

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Yeah, don't worry about it. She's on vaca with her family and they probably wouldn't appreciate her racking up the long distance phone bill, which might be why she didn't call. I didn't call my ex when I went to another country because I wouldn't have been able to afford the phone bill and he understood. No worries!!

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h.long Newbie

h.long

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You sound very dependent on her. Did you have anything to do for the holidays? Did you spend the dayz with your family? It seems like you're more worried about her well-being than yours.

 

Why not enjoy yourself while she is gone for these 11 days. Just chill out and relax. She'll be home soon enough.

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ghost69 Mentor

ghost69

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whoever is telling you that needs to chill out. she's on vacation. it's what you do. relax and enjoy whoever you are with...friends, family, etc. whenever i have a gf and she goes on vacation i don't bug her. shoot, gives me more time with the boys. get out and have fun while she's gone too.

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mr_iwi Newbie

mr_iwi

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I've never emailed whilst on holiday, let alone phoning people. It's a time to relax, and just for a very short time to put aside your obligations and responsibilities and do things purely for yourself. Whilst she's away, why not use the extra time you have to visit friends you don't see that much, or perhaps family of your own if possible?

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Nutz Rookie

Nutz

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Yeah, she's on vacation. Don't hold it against her. She's getting away from it all.

 

Or getting away with having "fun" with the guys back home. No way to know for sure based on what was written. I will say that experience tells me that women cheat like crazy when they're on vacation.

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jengh Experienced

jengh

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Or getting away with having "fun" with the guys back home. No way to know for sure based on what was written. I will say that experience tells me that women cheat like crazy when they're on vacation.

 

Wow, not true!!!!! I never cheated while on vacation!

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lady00 Grand Master

lady00

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I will say that experience tells me that women cheat like crazy when they're on vacation.

 

Geez. More gender stereotypes? Not helpful.

 

I'm sure some women do cheat while on vacation. Just as some men do. When the cat's away, the mouse will play, if their values justify cheating. It's not a gender thing though, and it's no big revelation that some people cheat when away from their partners. People also cheat when they are in the same city or town as their partners.

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Nutz Rookie

Nutz

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Geez. More gender stereotypes? Not helpful.

 

I'm sure some women do cheat while on vacation. Just as some men do. When the cat's away, the mouse will play, if their values justify cheating. It's not a gender thing though, and it's no big revelation that some people cheat when away from their partners. People also cheat when they are in the same city or town as their partners.

 

That has nothing to do with stereotypes. It's my life experience that they often cheat on vacation. And it's actually not just me. In fact there's a community name for it: "tourist mentality".

 

link removed

 

The idea behind tourist mentality is that you convey the fact tonite may be the last time you see each other, and that whatever happens this night doesnt "actually count". This makes her more willing/accepting that she can exhibit "bad girl" actions and yet not be held accountable for it.

 

More:

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lady00 Grand Master

lady00

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If a person is going to cheat, it is because their values justify it. They don't need to pay money and travel to do it. Tourist mentality is a convenient explanation but I just like to think it's far more simple than that: some people think cheating is OK. So they cheat. They meet their cheating partners on vacation, at the office, at the mall, at a bar. Wherever. And stereotyping by gender is not helpful to the OP. These same explanations apply equally to men.

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jlove89 Apprentice

jlove89

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i guess i made this thread cuz i felt like if she really cared about me she would find 5 mins to make a call just to say hi....if i were in another country i would call my girlfriend no matter what it cost even if its only for 2 mins just to say hi......but i guess everyone is different

 

i guess in a way im concerned cuz i know she has a few ex bfs there and i know she told me one of them she really liked but they couldnt be together because they were in different countries...and i feel like she may get together with him while shes there

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Nutz Rookie

Nutz

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i guess i made this thread cuz i felt like if she really cared about me she would find 5 mins to make a call just to say hi....if i were in another country i would call my girlfriend no matter what it cost even if its only for 2 mins just to say hi......but i guess everyone is different

 

i guess in a way im concerned cuz i know she has a few ex bfs there and i know she told me one of them she really liked but they couldnt be together because they were in different countries...and i feel like she may get together with him while shes there

 

Hahaha.... I knew the truth would come out. I suspect she's eating up the attention right now. What's funny is she probably talked about all the guys she was friends with back home and very well may even had a list of people she wanted to get in touch with when she was back. She considers them friends of course, but you and I know that guys are usually friends with a chick if they have a secret hope of hooking up with her. If you'd gone back with her and they knew she was with someone, most of the guys would probably not even reply to her requests to hang out. But with her going back alone those guys will all be more than happy to hang out again. There's a really good Tom Leykis episode on this very subject. I'll see if I can find it for you.

 

If I had to guess, I'd say you and your gf have only been dating for a few weeks to maybe a couple of months, but no more than 4 or 5 months. Am I right?

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jlove89 Apprentice

jlove89

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she only told me about 2 ex bfs from there....one she hates and the other she liked but said they couldnt be together cuz they were in different countries....the one she liked moved to africa to work but im guessing hell be home for christmas....i asked her if hed be there and she said she didnt know.....when i made a comment about her getting together with him she got mad at me and said well ull be in ny with all ur ex girlfriends....and yes weve been together 4 months

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Mutley Contributor

Mutley

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it could be worse.....I dated a girl who phoned and texted me the first two days she went to Mexico for a friend's wedding. Then she stopped and I thought no big deal---I found out later she slept with one of the groomsmen. Never even got an email when she got home

 

Boy, ain't relationships and dating fun???

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