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What does it mean...

Jess2006

By Jess2006
in Dating Advice

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Jess2006 Contributor

Jess2006

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If you have known a guy for a few weeks, and are getting to know each other, what does it mean when he says that he thinks we would have fun together if we start hanging out? And that he is just being laid back about things and "whatever happens, happens." Take into account that no sexual activity at all has taken place. I'm just curious. A couple of friends said that it probably meant FWB, but I'm not convinced...

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ghost69 Mentor

ghost69

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why don't you ask what he means by hanging out? sometimes i say hang out as in you can come over, watch some movies, play pool, go out to eat. could be anything. just a loose term i use. i really never use the word date unless the girl asks. oh, i might say 'take you out'. why not hang out with him and see what he means. get some better ideas.

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Jess2006 Contributor

Jess2006

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why don't you ask what he means by hanging out? sometimes i say hang out as in you can come over, watch some movies, play pool, go out to eat. could be anything. just a loose term i use. i really never use the word date unless the girl asks. oh, i might say 'take you out'. why not hang out with him and see what he means. get some better ideas.

 

Yeah, I didn't think of asking at the time because when he said "we should start hanging out" I thought it was pretty innocent and he just meant going out and being social. But then I mentioned it to some girls and they tried to demoralized me a little and said that it meant wanting to get laid, "ahving fun with our clothes off," etc. Which I don't necessarely agree with because I know that many guys don't like to use the word "date" as it sounds too formal.

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ghost69 Mentor

ghost69

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Yeah, I didn't think of asking at the time because when he said "we should start hanging out" I thought it was pretty innocent and he just meant going out and being social. But then I mentioned it to some girls and they tried to demoralized me a little and said that it meant wanting to get laid, "ahving fun with our clothes off," etc. Which I don't necessarely agree with because I know that many guys don't like to use the word "date" as it sounds too formal.

 

i say hang out all the time. i take a girl out, be social, meet my friends, see how she interacts with my crew, etc. it could just be going out for drinks and droppin her off later. even though that doesn't really ever happen. hehe. but, my intentions are not sex.

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Nutz Rookie

Nutz

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If you have known a guy for a few weeks, and are getting to know each other, what does it mean when he says that he thinks we would have fun together if we start hanging out? And that he is just being laid back about things and "whatever happens, happens." Take into account that no sexual activity at all has taken place. I'm just curious. A couple of friends said that it probably meant FWB, but I'm not convinced...

 

He wants to have sex with you. He's playing the nice guy game of hiding his intentions and making you think you two should be pals first. He's just a wuss and is afraid to come right out and say it.

 

On the other hand if you're not very attractive, but you have hot friends, he may be making nice with you in order to get with one them.

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ghost69 Mentor

ghost69

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He wants to have sex with you. He's playing the nice guy game of hiding his intentions and making you think you two should be pals first. He's just a wuss and is afraid to come right out and say it.

 

On the other hand if you're not very attractive, but you have hot friends, he may be making nice with you in order to get with one them.

 

amazing you got all of that out of one little piece of information.

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Batya33 Grand Master

Batya33

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I agree that you should ask him what he means or, if he suggests hanging out to have fun, agree to hang out in public places and do activities that are fun for the two of you. If he clarifies that he means to hang out at one of your homes alone, then you can explain that that is ok, but that you are not ready to have sex with him. (although I wouldn't be alone with a man unless i knew him fairly well, we'd been out at least a few times and I'd been clear about my boundaries).

 

"Whatever happens happens" would mean to me that for now he wants to keep things casual. Sounds normal/reasonable to me.

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Jess2006 Contributor

Jess2006

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He wants to have sex with you. He's playing the nice guy game of hiding his intentions and making you think you two should be pals first. He's just a wuss and is afraid to come right out and say it.

 

On the other hand if you're not very attractive, but you have hot friends, he may be making nice with you in order to get with one them.

 

It seems like you were able to get a lot from those few words, lol. We haven't kissed on the lips yet so I'm not sure that all he is looking for is sex. Plus he has said more than once that he wants to get to know me. And he has apologized for not being more forward, but that he got out of a relationship resently so he is trying to take things slow... I spoke with him yesterday and, in the context that we were talking, it seemed to me that he was using the words "hanging out" to go out and have a drink. And he hasn't met my friends yet so I don't think the second scenerio applies, lol.

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