any advice

[tinydancer81]

i'll explain a little, my so has been a little distant this week, i knew he was really busy with work and didn't think anything more, he mentioned he had lots to do still for christmas and couldn't get into it. It crossed my mind that this would be his first christmas without his father but i didn't want to bring it up unless he did. Well we had a long chat last night and he finally told me that he hasn't been himself and the reasons why, his first christmas without father, work has been manic and he lost a friend this week. He's in forces so its a OLR/LDR and I just wanted to know what i can do for him, i've told him im always here for him anytime he wants to talk, i'll just listen, i've offered my condolences, but i feel helpless.....i just want to wrap my arms around him and hold him.

 

Can anyone offer some good advice?I just want to help him.

 

We will be seeing each other very soon, so i can be more of a comfort then. Its just knowing what to do in the meantime.

[waveseer]

Let him know you understand what he's going through and you'll be there for him whenever he needs you.

[tinydancer81]

Thanks^^ i did let him know, guess thats all i can do.

[wtm78]

I just wanted to know what i can do for him, i've told him im always here for him anytime he wants to talk, i'll just listen, i've offered my condolences, but i feel helpless.....i just want to wrap my arms around him and hold him.

 

you had the best advice offered already... do exactly those.. wrap your arms around him and hold him... tell him you are there for him... that you will always be there anytime he wants to talk and you will just listen...

 

and the next step is more difficult and scary for you...

 

next you just have to give him time... even if the situation seems like nothing you did make a difference... know that it already did.... just give him time... and space when he need... constant hugs and affection will help him pull through...

[lost1607307474]

I'm going to have to agree with the other posts and say that all you can do is be there to hold him and support him through this tough time. Let him know you're there 100% - and understand his situation. Hope things get better for your SO.

[tinydancer81]

^^thats just it i can physically hold him just yet, we'll be together soon enough though. Im just desperate to be with him right now. Thanks everyone for your advice